Dosha Horoscopes - do people reveal them in Matrimonials?

[a-TB]

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Talked to the parent of a TB girl who lives in UK (but born in USA). They are friends of our family for a long time.

They are trying to look for alliance via Tamil matrimonial sites without telling the girl. They think that if they find someone suitable they can then introduce to her but the girl may not like the idea of advertising her profile.

Before putting an ad they talked to someone who is not an expert in astrology but scared them by saying the girl has a sinister issue called 'reverse Kala Sarpa Dosha of some kind (sheshnag? or some word like that) by looking at some computer generated chart for just 2 minutes.

Should they post the profile of this girl and that too with the horoscope?

I told them not to without consulting the girl. Not sure if it is wise to put the astrological chart online in any case.

I assume there are experts in the forum (like Mr Sangom Sir) because I searched and found a closed thread some years ago on this topic.

Any advice to this family? Post without astrological details? do nothing?

 

[krish44]

If someone is born in US and living in UK , not many expect her/her family to have faith in horoscopes.

while advertising in tamil sites, one can always indicate that horoscope is optional.

Instead of generating horoscope on site ,one can give only birth date,time and place of birth [longitude/latitude] and leave it to the boys side to cast or compare if they

are interested.

If they girl is well educated,in decent job abroad, most would not care for horoscope match.

It is very easy to find matches for girls since they are in short supply. Parents should care the least about horoscopes and pick and choose the boy they want based on other

requirements they might have.

 

[sangom]

If someone is born in US and living in UK , not many expect her/her family to have faith in horoscopes.

while advertising in tamil sites, one can always indicate that horoscope is optional.

Instead of generating horoscope on site ,one can give only birth date,time and place of birth [longitude/latitude] and leave it to the boys side to cast or compare if they

are interested.

If they girl is well educated,in decent job abroad, most would not care for horoscope match.

It is very easy to find matches for girls since they are in short supply. Parents should care the least about horoscopes and pick and choose the boy they want based on other

requirements they might have.

I fully agree with Shri krishji. For a girl born in US and living in UK, what the parents are attempting to do (viz.,alliance via Tamil matrimonial sites, without telling the girl) is the greatest harm they can do to her, I feel. The parents should allow her to find a life partner for herself and leave her free to choose how she does that.

Kalasarpa dosha and reverse kalasarpa dosha can, in some conditions, cause death of spouse and life as a widow or widower, but, in the modern age these are not great obstacles or tragedies to the woman's life itself.

 

[Vaagmi]

1. The parents can give the girl's horoscope in the site where they are advertising.

2. Those parents of the boys who give a lot of importance to horoscope matching and astrology will easily understand that there is kala sarpa dosha in the girl's horoscope and will avoid moving further. Kala sarpa dosha is easy to recognize in a horoscope. It does not require deep knowledge of astrology.

3. My understanding of Kala sarpa dosha is that it is a debilitating dosha which makes the person suffer for everything in life before achieving any success. It does not affect the spouse in any way.

4. So the answer to the specific question is that the parents of the girl need not mention that the girl is having that dosha. Those who bother about horoscopes will know it on taking the first look at the horoscope of the girl. Those who do not bother about horoscope matching will take other factors into account and may go for the marriage.

 

[a-TB]

My sincere thanks to everyone for all your thoughtful responses!
I passed on the information to the family. They plan to talk to girl before posting an ad (without revealing personal details like picture etc.) and state upfront that they do not want horoscope based discussions.

After doing some online research they found that this Dosha is assigned to anyone born within a 10 or 12 day period for example in year 1988. That will be millions around the world and hence it seems a meaningless Dosha!

Let me share some additional details in response to some questions that came up as part of your advice as to why parents are trying to help.

1) The girl is nice, highly educated (top engineering and then later one of the best business schools in USA), and works for a top consulting company that requires her to make presentations to Chairmen of Fortune 100 companies. Therefore she works over 60-70 hours a week going from one type of engagement worldwide to another. Her early lessons in BharathaNatyam, arangetram may be helping with disciplined approach to work according to her parents.
2) She is a vegetarian and does not have any habits like drinking etc.
3)Such people are not compatible to green card seeking bridegrooms from India living in USA.
4) She prefers someone who has similar background like her - raised in USA

Such profiles are not uncommon, I understand there are large number of Indian (and TB) boys and girls immersed in their career and not getting married till mid 30s.

Matrimonial systems do not exist help such people - American born, Hindu way of life, career focused ..
They want introductions but not upfront arranged marriage in a blind way.

Personally I am baffled by this Dosha to learn that it is assigned to such a large population in most of the year. I never had faith in Astrology and this reinforces this thinking. Some even say at age 30 or 33 it stops its influence .. come on!!

 

[tbs]

hi

for an american born ppl can have matrimonial ads....especially INDIA ABROAD like local magazines have bride/bridegroom

wanted columns...but generally i saw mainly ads from gujarati/north indian families living in USA/CANADA....not much abt

south indians.....community wise gujaratis/punjabis mainly dominated in USA....so they have vast choice.....generally

typical tamil brahmins follow WORD OF MOUTH/through relatives/friends.....now a days ..many jatakams having

KALA SARPA DOSHA...i heard from many families....its very common dosha ....

 

[sangom]

AFAIK, Kala Sarpa Dosha (KSD) arises if all the nine planets are situated in the Ketu-to-Rahu arc of 7 houses. If all the planets are located in the Rahu-to-Ketu arc, then also a less severe kind of KSD arises. Moon will be within this emi-circle for 15 days approx. and so this KSD will be found in millions of horoscopes during some periods. There are other combinations which will outweigh the KSD but this will depend on individual horoscopes.
Nehru had KSD in his horoscope. Though the other powerful yogas made him very rich, educated and even a world-known statesman, he lost his wife to disease, had no male issues to continue his lineage and died heart-broken and in some kind of disgrace. That is what KSD can do sometimes.

 

[krish44]

The status of indian americans is that of trisangku.

The older generation wants to retain their indian roots and would want boys liking the indian lifestyle of vegetarianism, observing brahmin rituals, non drinking ,non smoking

types who believe in sanctity of marriage.Yet they do not want those born and brought up in india as matches as they may not understand the american way of living.

Also these children born and brought up there may not be to able to understand and cope with the types from India, If they can find some who are locally born and

brought up and at the same time act like indian boys with right mix of american education ,high flying job and indian satvik way of living it could be excellent.

The requirements are contradictory and would be difficult to find such matches.Best is to forget indian roots and let the next generation make its own choices.

They would find it easier to bond with the local types wherever they are than the odd indian -american mixes who are dysfunctional mostly.

even in india, tamils in north or west india find it difficult to cope with mates from south india. They often choose local mates as they are easier to find and adjusting

to them is far easier as they are exposed to similar things