• This forum contains old posts that have been closed. New threads and replies may not be made here. Please navigate to the relevant forum to create a new thread or post a reply.
  • Welcome to Tamil Brahmins forums.

    You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our Free Brahmin Community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

    If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact contact us.

High Price of Success?

Status
Not open for further replies.

kunjuppu

Active member
Something that is familiar to all of us, I think.

Of late, I have thought about this a lot. How I was pushed to always come first in the class throughout school, with unfavourable consequences otherwise. Most of my NB friends had fun and appear to have a more stress free life, growing up in Madras of the 1950s and 60s.

I left home at 18, to stay in hostels and then left India. My behaviour was not unlike the boys mentioned in this Jeyamohan article. I also vowed that my children will not have the regimented life that I did, and to be sure, they had a great and fun filled school and university life. All thanks to the Canadian education system.

Which makes me wonder, if us tambrams, literally chase our children away from us, through our pushing them extremely. And as a consequence suffer the loneliness and 'away from them' life during our declining years.

Right now I do not have anyone in India younger than 55, but a lot of cousins older than that, and many of them missing their children living in USA or Australia. Sad state of affairs.

Here is JMo's article and I have quoted some choice paras for those impatient to read the whole thing.

நாளைக்காக மட்டும் வாழமுடியுமா?

சமீபத்தில் ஒரு மின்னஞ்சல் வந்தது. வழக்கம்போல வாசகர் எழுதியதல்ல, வாசகரின் தந்தை எழுதியது. தன்னை அறிமுகம் செய்துகொண்டார் அவர். மத்திய அரசில் ஆரம்பநிலை அதிகாரியாக இருந்தவர். இரண்டாம்நிலை அதிகாரியாக ஓய்வு பெற்றார்.

இரு பிள்ளைகள். இருவருமே நன்றாகப்படித்து அமெரிக்காவிலும் ஆஸ்திரேலியாவிலுமாக வேலைபார்க்கிறார்கள். இவர் திருச்சியில் மனைவியுடன் வாழ்கிறார்.

அவரது பிரச்சினை தனிமைதான்.

மனைவிக்கு கடுமையான கீல்வாதம். ஆகவே குளிர்நாடுகளில் சென்று வாழமுடியாது. அவருக்கு ஆஸ்துமாபிரச்சினை உண்டு. பிள்ளைகள் வெளிநாடுகளில் குடும்பத்துடன் வாழ்கிறார்கள். அவர்கள் இரண்டு ஆண்டுகளுக்கு ஒருமுறைகூட ஊருக்கு வருவதில்லை என்பதே அவரது மனக்குறை.

வந்தால் அதிகபட்சம் ஐந்துநாட்கள். உடனே கிளம்பிவிடுகிறார்கள். அந்த ஐந்து நாட்களிலும் மொத்தமாக ஐந்துமணிநேரம் பெற்றோரிடம் செலவழித்தால் அதிகம்

‘உங்கள் நூல்களை இங்கே வரும்போது என் இரண்டாவது மகன் கட்டுக்கட்டாக வாங்கிச்செல்கிறான். நீங்கள் ஏன் இதை அவனிடம் பேசக்கூடாது? நீங்கள் பேசினால் அவன் கேட்பான்’ என்றார் அவர்.

இம்மாதிரி குடும்ப விஷயங்களில் தலையிடக்கூடாதென்பது என் கொள்கை. ஆனால் அவர் மீண்டும் ஒரு மின்னஞ்சல் அனுப்பியபோது அதை அவரது மகனுக்கு அப்படியே திருப்பி விட்டேன்.

அவர் மகன் ஒருவாரம் கழித்து மிகநீளமான ஒரு மின்னஞ்சல் அனுப்பியிருந்தார். என்னை பலகோணங்களில் சிந்திக்கவைத்த கடிதம் அது

‘நான் திருச்சியில் இருபத்திரண்டு வருடம் வாழ்ந்திருக்கிறேன். ஆனால் திருச்சியுடன் எனக்கு மானசீகமாக எந்த உறவும் இல்லை. இருபத்திரண்டு வருடம் அப்பா அம்மாவுடன் வாழ்ந்தேன். ஆனால் அவர்களைப்பற்றி ஒரு நல்ல நினைவுகூட இல்லை’ என்றார் அவரது மகன். அவரது தந்தை அவரை ஒரு பொறியியலாளராக ஆக்கவேண்டும் என்பதைப்பற்றி மட்டும்தான் சிந்தனை செய்தார். அதுவும் அவர் எல்.கெ.ஜியில் சேர்வதற்கு முன்னதாகவே......

‘என் பெற்றோர் மீது எனக்கு மரியாதையும் நன்றியும் உண்டு. அவர்களை நான் புரிந்துகொள்கிறேன். ஆனால் அவர்களுடன் அரைமணிநேரம் என்னால் பேசிக்கொண்டிருக்க முடியாது. இருபத்திரண்டுவருடம் படி படி என்று மட்டுமே சொன்ன இரண்டு வயோதிகர்கள் அவர்கள்.

அவ்வளவுதான். அவர்களை நான் நேசிக்கவேண்டும் என்றால் அவர்களை எனக்கு தெரிந்திருக்கவேண்டும். அவர்களின் மனம் எனக்குப்புரிந்திருக்கவேண்டும். எனக்கு அவர்கள் அன்னியர்கள்போல தெரிகிறார்கள்’.......

அந்தக்கடிதத்தை அப்படியே அவரது தந்தைக்கு அனுப்பினேன். ’இதைவிட தெளிவாக எதையும் நான் சொல்லிவிடமுடியாது’ என்றேன். அவர் புரிந்துகொள்ளாமல் ‘நன்றிகெட்டதனம். பொறுப்பற்றத்தனம்’ என்று மகனை வசைபாடி ஒரு கடிதம் அனுப்பி எனக்கும் பிரதி அனுப்பியிருந்தார்.

மேலும் ஒருமாதம் கழித்து ‘இந்த தீபாவளிக்கு அவனை வரச்சொல்லமுடியுமா?’ என்று கேட்டு ஒரு மின்னஞ்சல் எனக்கு அனுப்பினார்


‘தீபாவளி என்பது இளமையில் கொண்டாடவேண்டிய ஒரு பண்டிகை. அன்றுதான் அந்த உற்சாகம் இருக்கும். வளர்ந்தபின் அந்த நினைவுகளைத்தான் கொண்டாடிக்கொண்டிருப்போம்.

உங்கள் மகனுக்கு நினைவுகளே இல்லை என்கிறார். நீங்கள் அவருக்கு உரிமைப்பட்ட பண்டிகைக்கொண்டாட்டங்கள் அனைத்தையும் பறித்துக்கொண்டுவிட்டீர்கள் என்கிறார்’ என நான் பதில் எழுதினேன்.

வாழ்க்கை என்பது எதிர்காலத்துக்கான போராட்டம் அல்ல. வாழும் தருணங்களை உயிர்ப்புடன் வைத்துக்கொள்வதுதான். அதற்காகவே பண்டிகைகளும் கொண்டாட்டங்களும் திருவிழாக்களும் நம் முன்னோரால் உருவாக்கப்பட்டுள்ளன. நாளை முக்கியம்தான், இன்று அதைவிட முக்கியம்.
.


The ones that did not do so well in school, went to ordinary colleges, had a degree, a job... did not do so badly in India either. But all these were not tambrams. They still live in the old neighbourhoods, and still have bonds with their families.. albeit smaller in size than the previous generation.

Did we lose out in the long run? I don't know. But I wonder!!

PS: After nearly 35 years, recently I met one of my childhood friends. He introduced me to his children thus, 'This guy used to be with books all the time. Always reading. Have to drag him to come to play. Always with books'.... I liked books but also because my parents wished me to be with books, than friends. Other than the prescribed 2 hours or such in the evenings after school. The others used to laze around and chat till 730 or so, but I was home at 6. To be with... what else, my school books.
 
Last edited:
Dear Kunjs,

I am surprised to read that you were pushed to be 1st in class.

I was never pushed to be 1st even though I used to be rank among the top of the class..sometimes 1st and sometimes 2nd or 3rd.

Parents never pushed me to be 1st..in fact they used to tell me "stop studying and go to sleep!" cos I used to study many hours a day.

Out here students are encouraged to take part in sports and its compulsory to be active in either games or athletics..for me it was athletics.. .real serious training..state level competition.

So life as a teen was busy..studying and juggling athletic training.


I remember trying to get some studying done in the stadium while waiting for my event cos my exam was just 1 week after the state level athletic meet.

Generally most other top students shy away from sports cos they were hopeless in sports!

If you ask me as a teen I loved to study cos I love knowledge and at the same time I love athletics...when I was free I also went for music classes(Piano) and kept myself busy learning to sing bhajans over the weekends.

I have no regrets being a book worm and also an active sportsperson..that made me what I am today..today I love to keep reading and gaining any knowledge and my past background in sports has made me a person who still takes fitness seriously in the gym and my passion for music is still going on strong.


Even in college before any dance party ..I used to make sure I had done all studies before I head for the dance party.

Studies should always come 1st before anything else..once we let the mind be idle..we tend to slack in mental capacity but at the same time all study and no play make Jack/Jill a dull person.

So children should know to study to be mentally active and to play to be physically active.

Our ancient study system did not emphasize on text book study alone..the students used to do Yoga..tend to plants/cows..plant vegetables etc in the ashram..they were never books worms but all rounders..in fact ancient Gurus used to have practical hands on approach too by sending students to face certain situations alone..so it was a balanced IQ and EQ method.

Only now everyone focuses on studying non stop and nothing else.
The take home point is to learn to strike a balance..one should have a healthy dose of studies and a healthy dose of some form of relaxation in form of sports/game and a hobby of some music/arts/craft.

Enjoyment in life does not mean not studying etc..studying is a good habit to make sure the mind is active.


Have you noticed that those who do not have the reading habit usually waste away their old age?

They just sit there watching some TV serial or just find fault with others at home and then get some dementia.

These days I think parents have a different worry..that is how to get their kids to stop being addicted to the internet!LOL
 
Dear Kunjuppu,

I was demanded to get the 1st rank too. But that was way beyond me.I was always rank 6 or 7. Finished school ranking 8 from all classes. I could not enjoy my young days without feeling guilt.

I was quite ignorant in those days. Imagine, I was so ignorant, I thought I could prepare myself for IIT entrance by studying some B grade P.U.C text books! When it was 3 days to IIT entrance exam, this father of mine brought some tattered old IIT entrance exam guides and told me to prepare. Then only I realised the enormity of the test!

When I went to the exams I felt like facing four large hungry lions with my bare hands. Leave alone not able to answer the questions, I did not even understand most of the Questions! :p

My in-laws never understood me. I really wanted to help them as a son. But my FIL nursed his anger for my seducing his innocent daughter until after I moved out to Australia. He did realise after many years, but it was way too late.

My dear parents? Bless them! They couldn't spare a nice word leave alone to myself, not even to my son only because he is my son! Amirtha was/is treated badly as of today only because she is my wife ( before our marriage she was treated very well because she was her father's daughter!).

Oh well! That's life, I suppose. But I enjoyed every moment just on my own.

You are right. Most of the TB children submit their fun and pleasure in pursuit of that 1st rank. Most of them do not know any different, anyway.

Cheers!
 
hi
becoz older generation TB's always education priority.....survival is the fittest....insecurity among relatives....comparison/

judgemental are basic instinct genetical qualities of any TB.......now days are a changed a lot......dignity in the community...

regimented in day to day life.....above all VARATTU GAURAVAM.......IS IT BLESSING/PUNISHMENT TO COMMUNITY....i heard

the same some first generation immigrant TBs of USA.....the same character after landing in a different continent....

they never change.....but kids are changing.......a lot.....
 
Last edited:
There is too much emphasis for achievement in formal education. A student has to spend all of his time on studies to stay on top of the class. I think aiming for that 1st rank is really not worth in the long run. One would do better to settle for a lesser goal but make sure that one understands the subjects very well. Also parents need to prepare their kids to face the world right from their childhood and not keep them protected from the outside world since one's personality is largely shaped by one's childhood experiences.
 
Coming to myself I was never pushed...I myself was very studious..I liked to read a lot..Was not interested in sports as a student..Was however interested in music..My parents asked me to study to the best of my ability..No pushing at all..

I feel that Tambrahm boys were pushed hard especially in TN...Following is my analysis:

1. Intense competition in higher education...Unless you get high marks in PUC or + 2 you cannot get a good professional education..This was before start of the private colleges for Engineering and medicine..So the boys were pushed hard to come on top till SSLC & PUC so that admission is not an issue

2. Girls during the 60's & 70's were not pushed hard..They were trained in household activities..May be typrwriting, shorthand etc so that they can join Government job

3. Come 80's & 90"s with smaller families both girls & boys are equally forced to study...But parents are less intruding now...May be they want restriction on Internet /TV and Video Games..Also there is much more focus on extra curricular activities now.. Most of the Tambrahms are learning a 3rd language so that their employability improves

4. With more private colleges & higher availability of seats the pressure on academics have reduced a lot..Now parents understand that development of holistic personality is more important..I know a tambrahm boy whose father is a top notch professional..But the boy is not studying Engg or Medical..But he is studying Liberal arts in US..Now opportunities are galore and professional education is no more the sine qua non

5. But when it comes to being socially conscious we are more arm chair advisors/Lecturers..We are not aggressive as a community...
 
Kunjuppu,

The letter from a parent only indicates the problem with their son. The son would have been like this even if he is a total failure. The parents have done only what any normal parents would do. Twenty years in Tiruchi and he has no attachment to Trichy. Did the city of Trichy do anything wrong?


This article is one of the thousands of articles written to propagate a point of View. That is that parents should stay with the children preferably sons. This has been repeated so often even in this forum.

The key words in this article are

இரு பிள்ளைகள். இருவருமே நன்றாகப்படித்து அமெரிக்காவிலும் ஆஸ்திரேலியாவிலுமாக வேலைபார்க்கிறார்கள். இவர் திருச்சியில் மனைவியுடன் வாழ்கிறார்.

அவரது பிரச்சினை தனிமைதான்.

My Parents stayed in my village alone till my father was 80. We had to force the parents to move out. I do not know much about Trichy. But I had a cousin who was staying in L.I.C. Colony. Nice place and good neighborhood.

Even when the parents stays with the sons, the sons do not talk often to the father. Some times for days together there is no inter-action between the son and the father.

This depends upon the character of the son. I have not seen my younger son for more than two years. He is India. Whereas my niece who is in U.S visits her parents almost every year. There are sons who live in Chennai and have not visited their parents in Kanchipuram for years.


It depends on the character of the son and not whether he is a success or not.
 
Kunjuppu,

The letter from a parent only indicates the problem with their son. The son would have been like this even if he is a total failure. The parents have done only what any normal parents would do. Twenty years in Tiruchi and he has no attachment to Trichy. Did the city of Trichy do anything wrong?


This article is one of the thousands of articles written to propagate a point of View. That is that parents should stay with the children preferably sons. This has been repeated so often even in this forum.

The key words in this article are

இரு பிள்ளைகள். இருவருமே நன்றாகப்படித்து அமெரிக்காவிலும் ஆஸ்திரேலியாவிலுமாக வேலைபார்க்கிறார்கள். இவர் திருச்சியில் மனைவியுடன் வாழ்கிறார்.

அவரது பிரச்சினை தனிமைதான்.

My Parents stayed in my village alone till my father was 80. We had to force the parents to move out. I do not know much about Trichy. But I had a cousin who was staying in L.I.C. Colony. Nice place and good neighborhood.

Even when the parents stays with the sons, the sons do not talk often to the father. Some times for days together there is no inter-action between the son and the father.

This depends upon the character of the son. I have not seen my younger son for more than two years. He is India. Whereas my niece who is in U.S visits her parents almost every year. There are sons who live in Chennai and have not visited their parents in Kanchipuram for years.


It depends on the character of the son and not whether he is a success or not.

Yes, Character, Attitude, Intentions of the children matters. It all depends on how they value relationship as much as they value their profession and professional success. There is always some crucial moments when a person has to be capable enough to weigh many things and keep balancing their personal & professional life. It all depends on what their perspectives of life are and what they carry in their heart? It all depends on how much they think from their brain, reckoning their intellectual, rational & practical intelligence and how much from their heart, reckoning their tender emotional feelings that are deeply engrossed within with feelings of love, care and compassion?

It all depends on how are they balancing such thought process while retaining importance to compassionate human relationships?
 
I totally disagree with the op. If children are not motivated, and parents become their 'friends', for the most part that child is going to fail. Very few people are born self motivated. If parents abdicate their role then the child has very little chance of success.

For parents of young children, the goal should be to appropriately support the development of motivation so that there is a proper foundation for optimal educational growth. Parents should be very cautions about the use of many extrinsic rewards, as this can severely interfere with the child's motivational development. Praise for an accomplishment is appropriate, but be sure that your child is doing a task because she is interested, not because she thinks it will bring praise from you.

The world through a child's eyes is an awesome place. Allow children to explore and discover their world. Around every corner is an experience just waiting to surprise and excite young growing minds; all they need is a small amount of direction and a large amount of freedom. It is not necessary to praise and reward children for their own actions as they attempt to control their environment. The feelings of accomplishment they gain from results of those actions will be reward enough. Providing excessive praise and rewards is unnecessary and can actually be harmful to children's motivation and desire to learn. Remember, the habits and attitudes toward learning that are formed in these early years set the mood for all future learning.

The current depiction of tiger parenting is decidedly negative. Kim Wong Keltner's book on "Tiger Babies Strike Back" and Su Yeong Kim's report "Does Tiger Parenting Exist? Parenting Profiles of Chinese Americans and Adolescent Developmental Outcomes" suggest that strict Asian-style parenting produces an army of disengaged or emotionally stunted robots.

According to Grace Liu:

While I can't speak for everyone, my own experience suggests that such upbringing also gives us the smarts to recognize our emotional and social deficiencies and to address them.My parents are immigrants from Taiwan. I was an only child, and I was expected to excel academically and extracurricularly. So, I delivered. I got straight A's. I played violin for hours. I did extra math, chemistry and physics problem sets under the eagle-eyed gaze of my mother.
Through it all, I cried and screamed. A lot. My mom yelled back. A lot. I told her I hated my life, my teachers, my school and all my activities. She yelled that I just had to get through it. Quitting was not an option. And of course she was right.


I owe everything I am and have accomplished to my parents. My family expected a lot from me only because they believed in me and wanted the best for me. They pushed me to excel because they valued me as an individual.

Opinion: Why tiger moms are great - CNN.com

I salute the strict parents of this world who's children are achievers, without those parents we will have a generation of morons.

When a child is born it does not come with an instruction manual, we all have to struggle and find the best solution for our children. The best solution may be different for different child. So there is no universal solution.

Students of Asian birth or heritage in the US excel academically vis a vis their peers. Why? It is not their teachers. They are sitting in the same classrooms in America as non-Asians. They excel because of their parents.

If you spend some time with Chinese parents, Japanese parents, definitely Korean parents, Indian parents, Pakistani parents, and I could go on...you will quickly see that their children’s education is second perhaps only to their health. What is every other word out of the mouths of these parents--especially the mothers?
"Study!" By the way, the word that alternates with "study" is... "Eat!" ... :)
http://askville.amazon.com/Asian-ch...es-Teachers/AnswerViewer.do?requestId=9182683
 
Last edited:
thanks folks. nice to see all these well thought out responses.

i think, the trick is to find the via media - where the parent succeeds in motivating the kid, and still manages a level of relaxation/informality. driven hard to success, may eventually get the appreciation of the child, when the child is at a post middle age.

there is a lot missed in between, i think. a filipino colleague of mine, with 3 boys, used to say the best time of the day was the dinner. it was the rule that the family ate together, and it dragged on for more than an hour. it was the time to catch up and exchange ideas experiences and problems. all these are avenues for bonding.

yes the word is 'bond'. there is no set formula to bond. except at the end of the day, we know, either we have bonded with our children/parent or not. to grow old without bonds, and only with sense of duty, is akin to flying in singapore airlines - all efficiency and no heart. give me heart anyday.
 
Yes bonding is important.
While growing up all the men folk in my parents house used to eat together, and then ladies will eat.
In my house the dinner was the main meal and we used to eat together, and my daughter was commenting how she used to look forward to that.
I agree that sometimes you have to use tough love, sometime carrots to get the best out of children. My daughter is successful independent person due to her own effort and her Karmas, may be we as parents contributed to her success.

I also have seen children fail, when parents are scared to discipline and set limits for their children.
There is show on Nat geo called "Dog whisperer", the host of the show Cesar Millan has an approach which every parent should watch. Please do not conclude that I am suggesting that our children should be treated as dogs, but there is a lot to understanding behavior.

Millan's work focuses on handling a dog with what he calls "calm-assertive energy", which ought to transfer from the owner to the dog. He approaches dog behavior by teaching dog owners to understand the natural needs and responses of a dog, to understand that dogs are pack animals, to assist owners in establishing their role as calm-assertive pack leaders.


Millan prioritizes fulfilling and balancing a dog's primary needs: exercise, discipline and affection—in that order. In other words, it is the owner's responsibility to fulfill the dog's energy level through challenging exercise; to provide clearly communicated rules, boundaries and limitations for the dog's behavior; and to give the dog affection at the right time. Millan encourages owners to give affection, but to give affection when the dog is in a balanced state of mind, not when the dog is fearful, anxious, avoidant or excited — when the affection itself can reinforce imbalance. According to Millan, a common pitfall for dog owners is to give a great deal of affection with very little discipline and even less exercise.



Cesar Millan - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
 
Last edited:
Kunjuppu,

The letter from a parent only indicates the problem with their son. The son would have been like this even if he is a total failure. The parents have done only what any normal parents would do. Twenty years in Tiruchi and he has no attachment to Trichy. Did the city of Trichy do anything wrong?


This article is one of the thousands of articles written to propagate a point of View. That is that parents should stay with the children preferably sons. This has been repeated so often even in this forum.

The key words in this article are

இரு பிள்ளைகள். இருவருமே நன்றாகப்படித்து அமெரிக்காவிலும் ஆஸ்திரேலியாவிலுமாக வேலைபார்க்கிறார்கள். இவர் திருச்சியில் மனைவியுடன் வாழ்கிறார்.

அவரது பிரச்சினை தனிமைதான்.

My Parents stayed in my village alone till my father was 80. We had to force the parents to move out. I do not know much about Trichy. But I had a cousin who was staying in L.I.C. Colony. Nice place and good neighborhood.

Even when the parents stays with the sons, the sons do not talk often to the father. Some times for days together there is no inter-action between the son and the father.

This depends upon the character of the son. I have not seen my younger son for more than two years. He is India. Whereas my niece who is in U.S visits her parents almost every year. There are sons who live in Chennai and have not visited their parents in Kanchipuram for years.


It depends on the character of the son and not whether he is a success or not.
hi nachi sir,

just info.....i visit my age old mother in chennai from USA every year without fail............i visit regularly more than 15 yrs every


year....my own cousin living in chennai visiting his own parents living coimbatore once in 3 yrs or more...sometimes once in 5 yrs...

yes ..its character of the individual and bond with realation.....i talk to my mom every day from USA....all seven days....

atleast 15 mins without fail....its my daily duty/routine.....
 
There is show on Nat geo called "Dog whisperer", the host of the show Cesar Millan has an approach which every parent should watch. Please do not conclude that I am suggesting that our children should be treated as dogs, but there is a lot to understanding behavior.

Prasad Ji,

You think just like me!LOL

That is what I told my husband long back that parents should watch Dog Whisperer for better parenting.

Dogs are very much like little kids and the pick up parental anxiety very easily and react badly in the form of fear or aggression.

I love that show..it makes you understand even our own faults better.
 
" Good Parenting", i.e., bringing up one's children in such a way that they (the children) are at least reasonably successful and also carry a life-long impression that their parents were loving, affectionate, caring, etc., is a near-impossible task, according to me. There can be no permanent (or even long-term) guidelines of a general nature because the world goes on changing and no two couples (parents) are even similarly placed in regard to parenting.

Just as life's course varies from one individual to another, and even siblings can have widely different lives, the attitude of one's children towards father/mother also can show wide variations. I feel that the best that a parent can (and should) do, is to be 100% sincere to the future welfare of one's children; this, again, will depend upon the parent concerned. Having brought up one's children to the best of one's ability, it is better to leave the children to follow their lives according to their lights and develop a detached attitude bearing in mind the famous Sloka of the Bhagavad Geeta :कर्मण्येवाधिकारस्ते मा फलेषु कदाच न (karmaṇyevādhikāraste mā phaleṣu kadāca na).

Children will usually have a tendency to blame their parents for all that does not go well in their life; but if and when they beget children and start bringing up their kids, they will realize the intricacies and some of them, at least, will repent having blamed their parents for their own inadequacies.

But, today, we in India are undergoing a great social change and slowly but surely the conditions in the developed world are being increasingly adopted in our communities too. As and when this social transformation gets complete, we will face all the difficulties, separations, estrangements, etc., which are currently experienced by parents there, I feel.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Latest posts

Latest ads

Back
Top