Meanigful punchlines-

[usaiyer]

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1.I am a nobody,nobody is perfect and therefore I 'am perfect.
2.I have got to sit down and work out where I stand.
3.If I save time ,when do I get it back.?
4.Where there is a will,I want to be in it.
5.I am free of all prejudices ,I hate every one equally.
6.Take my advice.I don't use it anyway.

 

[usaiyer]

7.The statement below is true,
The statement above is false.
8.As I said before .I never repeat myself.
9.Sometimes I need what only you can provide:
your absence.
10 I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence.
There is a knob called brightness,but it doesn't work.
11.Conscience does not prevent sin,It only prevents you from enjoying it.
12.If at first you don't succeed,skydiving is not for you.

 

[usaiyer]

13.War doesn't determine who is right.War determines who is left.
14.Best way to prevent hangover is to stay drunk.
15,Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?
16. If your father is a poor man .it is your fate,but if your father-in-law is a poor man,it is your stupidity.
17.I was born intelligent-education ruined me.
18 A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where train stops.On my desk .I have a work station.....what more can I say?
19, I f it is true that we are here to help others.then what exactly are the others here for.?

 

[prasad1]

1.I am a nobody,nobody is perfect and therefore I 'am perfect.
2.I have got to sit down and work out where I stand.
3.If I save time ,when do I get it back.?
4.Where there is a will,I want to be in it.
5.I am free of all prejudices ,I hate every one equally.
6.Take my advice.I don't use it anyway.

That was funny and just so right.

 

[usaiyer]

Thank you,you found the crux.
They are funny and also right.
I don't know if you have noticed punch dialogues in Tamil movies.
"Nan oru daram sonna nooru daram sonna madiri"
Though these are not so funny ,they are the movie goers' delight.

 

[Lotusinsanskrit]

Nan oru daram sonna nooru daram sonna madiri

Oru Vaati Mudivu Panta, Yen Pecha Naane Kekka Maaten
Is also another famous punch line of vijay's.

 

[usaiyer]

20.Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright,until you hear them speak.
21.How come 'abbreviated' is such a long word.
22.Don't frown.you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
23.The best of proverbs: should women have children after 35? No,35 children are enough.
24.Living on earth may be expensive.....but it includes an annual free trip around the Sun.
25.Your future depends on your dreams,so go to sleep!
26.Alcohol kills slowly,so what? Who's in a hurry?
27.Whom are you working for?Same people,my wife and kids.
28.A drunk was hauled into court.Mister,The Judge began,you have been brought here for drinking........
Great,the drunk exclaimed.When do we get started?
29.Can you do anything that other people can't? Sure,I can read my handwriting.

 

[A N V Ramani]

	MATCH THE FOLLOWING
	Kerala		Tamil	Explanation
1​	Kashnam	a	Chattai	Normally shirt
2​	Pani	b	Vellam	Jaggery
3​	Panjasarai	c	Kuzhambu	E.g. sambar
4​	Sharkarai	d	Mejai	Table
5​	Kootan	e	Veshti	Dhoti
6​	Kasailai	f	Marudhaani
7​	Kappalandi	g	Chutney	Normally coconut jelly
8​	Mundu	h	Juram	Fever
9​	Meashai	i	Chakkarai	Sugar
10​	Kuppayam	j	Naarkali	Chair
11​	Mylanji	k	Verkadalai	Ground nut
12​	Chammandhi	l	Thaan	Vegetables in sambar

 

[A N V Ramani]

Tamil Maami- Engathu Maama Engineer. Ungaathu Maama?
Kerala Maami- Engathu Maama Oditar (Auditor)
Tamil Maami- Ayio Paavame
Kerala Maami-???

 

[A N V Ramani]

	MATCH THE FOLLOWING
	Kerala		Tamil	Explanation
1​	Kashnam	a	Chattai	Normally shirt
2​	Pani	b	Vellam	Jaggery
3​	Panjasarai	c	Kuzhambu	E.g. sambar
4​	Sharkarai	d	Mejai	Table
5​	Kootan	e	Veshti	Dhoti
6​	Kasailai	f	Marudhaani
7​	Kappalandi	g	Chutney	Normally coconut jelly
8​	Mundu	h	Juram	Fever
9​	Meashai	i	Chakkarai	Sugar
10​	Kuppayam	j	Naarkali	Chair
11​	Mylanji	k	Verkadalai	Ground nut
12​	Chammandhi	l	Thaan	Vegetables in sambar

Ans.1-L, 2-H, 3I, 4-B, 5-C, 6-J, 7-K, 8-E, 9-D, 10-A, 11-F, 12-G