Taking on husband's last name

[guidedmissiledad]

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If this topic has been discussed already, please ignore the thread - my apologies in advance.

How common is it these days for women to take on their husband's last name. I know it would be de rigeur in very traditional families but given the extent of social change, i would expect some departure from this norm in the bigger cities?

 

[vgane]

I guess it is very popular...It gives a safety net to the marred woman!!

 

[krish44]

There is a lot of nuisance involved in name change.

It is wise to continue with same surname instead of adding husbands surname dropping /without dropping existing surname for women.

All records then require revision.

Only one person I have heard has added wifes surname- swaminathan iyer ankesaria..

No sense losing ones born identity and diluting oneself.

Sometimes adding husbands name makes husband a laughing stock in female circles.

Where is gender equality with such abhorrent practices.

 

[Raji Ram]

Those who get married after taking their passport, have their father's name as surname, to avoid confusion for the U S of A officials!

I have seen many girls in the U S of A, having such names.

 

[GANESH65]

Changing Surname is a tradition normally practice all over the world. One member of this forum told me that you can't change surname after marriage in Malaysia as their local rules does not permit it! Now days it has become a practice to have two surnames since surname also carries lot of goodwill I suppose.

 

[Raji Ram]

There was a funny incident at the Boston airport. The officer did not know which is a male name and which is a female name! :der:

He took my passport and referred to Ram's ticket. He compared the spelling of Ramachandran in both and asked us, 'Is there any

proof that RAJE has surname as Gopalan? If not, you will not be allowed to board the flight!' We were shocked for a second but found

out immediately that he was checking the ticket of Ram with my passport! Since both have Ramachandran, the officer was confused!

Then he checked the spellings in the passports and tickets carefully and said, 'Have a nice trip!', with a smile!

 

[krish44]

Many women feel that revealing their first name to anyone makes it an invasion of privacy. They would prefer to give prefix Mrs with husbands surname to make it

impersonal.Most would like their anonymity for safety reasons in professional circles. Also adding Mrs is to indicate to men that they are untouchables.

 

[Raji Ram]

.......Most would like their anonymity for safety reasons in professional circles. Also adding Mrs is to indicate to men that they are untouchables.

The problem arises because they don't were kumkum on the 'vagidu'!!! :lol:

 

[vgane]

It is similar to Thali charadu in Tamil Nadu

I have seen in the North when a TB male marries a Non TB woman, the woman combines both her surname with that of husband..Like Shalini Srivastava Rajan!

 

[renuka]

Out here none of us change our names officially cos we all have an Identity card with a microchip having all details and name has to match our birth certificates and ID card.

Legally any transaction has to use our name in ID cos even bank uses the ID card when the microchip is scanned so we cant have a different name.

Professionally too all names have to match ID..so you can never find anyone using husbands name officially.

BTW this adding husband's name is a western phenomenon..its not Indian at all.

Indians just add Shrimati as a prefix to a married woman's name and she goes about life as usual.

So if some female is known as Leela ..before marriage she is Kumari Leela and after marriage she is Shrimati Leela.

Just like among Muslims...if a persons name is Aminah she would be Aminah Begum before marriage and becomes Begum Aminah after marriage.

This adding husband's surname name behind name is a western culture.

Being a conservative female I have not added husband's first name behind my name!LOL

 

[krish44]

conservative women hide behind husbands name in india

 

[renuka]

I only use Mrs So and So when I want to escape some situations!LOL

Like recently I got a call from a company offering some new plan for TV channels and I said I have to discuss with husband..I gave my name as Mrs So and So and not my maiden name and then the person on the phone said but I am sure you can decide on your own...I said No..I wont...cos I am conservative and need to discuss with husband and then will call you back if I need the offer ..if I dont call you back in 2 days time that means I did not get consent from husband.

The person on the phone was getting pissed with me and said Ok Ok Ok!

Ha ha ha...so there are times when being wife of someone helps!LOL

Even when people come for donations to my work place I say the same time...need to ask husband before I donate otherwise it is not considered Halal to donate.

People give me the stares when I act all bloody conservative!LOL

 

[krish44]

Not only that you have to act coy .and not take husband name before outsiders and refer to him as "woh". Having sindhur in hair also helps as RRji says.lol

Trying to imagine renukaji that way

 

[Raji Ram]

Hiding behind husband's name? Not always, Krish Sir! :nono:

There were many debates to have Ms instead of Miss or Mrs, by women's liberation movement! :thumb:

 

[auh]

Is there any logic in women taking on husband's last name other than the usual male chauvinism and tendency to trample on female ego?

 

[krish44]

There is a lot of wisdom in hiding behind someone.

Many husbands also do that.

Wifes shoulders are convenient as most wives are shorter than husband and their shoulder height is best for mounting rifle and shooting from behind.

 

[Raji Ram]

Is there any logic in women taking on husband's last name other than the usual male chauvinism and tendency to trample on female ego?

Not always, Auh Ji! Our Gods have shown a different perception too!
Hence the male names Seetharaman, Seethapathi, Lakshminarayanan, Lakshmipathi, Umashankar, Umapathi, Radhakrishnan and so on..... :bump2:

And, there were / are male writers like Sujatha, Indira Parthasarathy and Pushpa Thangadurai. :thumb: