Can Vishwabrahmin boy marry a Brahmin Iyer girle

[cmkonline]

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I am a Vishwa brahmin (gold smith, suparnarishi gothra) boy and i follow pure vegetarianism, suppose to wear punool (punool kalyanam not yet done. would be done before marriage), recite siva puranam every monday & saturday, follow oru pozhudu on every mondays, thursdays & saturday , follow fasting on siva rathiri and ekadesi..follow most of the brahma karmas.

I do like a brahmin iyer girl and i want to marry her. But people say I cannot marry because of different caste and she also believes it cannot happen because of caste.

The old vedic reference states that vishwa brahmin too are the descendants of brahmins and some point they have been demoted.

Vishwa brahmins does daily poojas, recite mantras etc.

I am true to God and holy. I am going to loose someone worth of my life for reasons of caste, eventhough I am more like them..( I feeling like the kid in A.I)

I want your views anywhich way it is. Please comment...!

 

[prasad1]

You are human being, and so is the girl, where is the problem?
If she or you are raising excuses not to get married, means your resolve is not strong enough, and should not get married.

You want excuses you can use any one of the following:
Caste, language, race, color, state, language, country, religion, family, village, etc

 

[sarang]

In principle YES if there is a general agreement between the parties and objections are sorted out. The difficulties in the conduct of rituals (what to follow and what to compromise) are to be discussed and cleared by the families.

 

[Jaykay767]

Look if you both love each other, what is the issue?. just go ahead & get married, what has caste/subsect have anything to do with it - all differnces can be sorted out mutually.

However if the girl is saying no for whatever reason, then the question is does she really love you??. If no, then u are better of looking for some one else !

Listen, this is the not the end all or be all of everything. Just go for another person & get on with life !. Please dont waste your life chasing someone who has issues on caste etc..

All the best !

 

[sarma-61]

I am a Vishwa brahmin (gold smith, suparnarishi gothra) boy and i follow pure vegetarianism, suppose to wear punool (punool kalyanam not yet done. would be done before marriage), recite siva puranam every monday & saturday, follow oru pozhudu on every mondays, thursdays & saturday , follow fasting on siva rathiri and ekadesi..follow most of the brahma karmas.

I do like a brahmin iyer girl and i want to marry her. But people say I cannot marry because of different caste and she also believes it cannot happen because of caste.

The old vedic reference states that vishwa brahmin too are the descendants of brahmins and some point they have been demoted.

Vishwa brahmins does daily poojas, recite mantras etc.

I am true to God and holy. I am going to loose someone worth of my life for reasons of caste, eventhough I am more like them..( I feeling like the kid in A.I)

I want your views anywhich way it is. Please comment...!

Shri cmk,

In today's atmosphere, you will get only opinions favourable to you and that too in a public website like this. But that is because most of the self-proclaiming brahmins who write here, have gone very much far away from living the life of a "brahmana", and many of these people may be shades worse than you in leading a well-disciplined life. Hence, if the girl and her family are also one of these "pseudo-brahmin" people, then there may be no harm in your marrying that girl.

But if the girl belongs to a really brahmana family, with the father doing sandhyaavandanam regularly, and the family observing the other rules, customs, restrictions, etc., prescribed for a 'brahmanan', and since you say the girl "also believes it cannot happen because of caste", I am of the firm view that you should forget about that girl and should not try to possess her forcibly, like what Ravana tried in Ramayana. That will be the correct advice to follow, though there may be many so-called brahmins here to advice you to the contrary and even to find fault with me.

 

[Jaykay767]

Shri cmk,

In today's atmosphere, you will get only opinions favourable to you and that too in a public website like this. But that is because most of the self-proclaiming brahmins who write here, have gone very much far away from living the life of a "brahmana", and many of these people may be shades worse than you in leading a well-disciplined life. Hence, if the girl and her family are also one of these "pseudo-brahmin" people, then there may be no harm in your marrying that girl.

But if the girl belongs to a really brahmana family, with the father doing sandhyaavandanam regularly, and the family observing the other rules, customs, restrictions, etc., prescribed for a 'brahmanan', and since you say the girl "also believes it cannot happen because of caste", I am of the firm view that you should forget about that girl and should not try to possess her forcibly, like what Ravana tried in Ramayana. That will be the correct advice to follow, though there may be many so-called brahmins here to advice you to the contrary and even to find fault with me.

Dear Sir,

with absolute respect to you, I will have to completely disagree with you on the relevance of this in today's times.

yes, we have followed this for generations & centuries downwards, isnt it high time for us TB's/Iyers to change & embrace our fellow dravidians !!

Posted by a Tamil Brahmin/Iyer !!.

 

[ozone]

Dear Sir,
with absolute respect to you, I will have to completely disagree with you on the relevance of this in today's times.
yes, we have followed this for generations & centuries downwards, isnt it high time for us TB's/Iyers to change & embrace our fellow dravidians !!

1 Should this be decided by the individuals concerned or thrust on some one by a few individuals
2 Is marriage the only means to embrace others?
3 Should you create discord in another family just to create love for yourself?

Posted by a Tamil Brahmin/Iyer !!.

The correct wording should be: Posted for a non Tamil Brahmin/Iyer !!.
The OP author says:

I am going to loose someone worth of my life for reasons of caste, eventhough I am more like them.

What so, especially if the Girl is not serious about it.
What is the OP author really looking for? When he says the Girl herself thinks this is not good, what is he upto?
He wants to take selective replies from here and convince her and her family?
There are so many reasons why people dont get what they consider worthy of their life. This is just one. Move on man, there are many other options out there.

 

[Jaykay767]

1 Should this be decided by the individuals concerned or thrust on some one by a few individuals
2 Is marriage the only means to embrace others?
3 Should you create discord in another family just to create love for yourself?

The correct wording should be: Posted for a non Tamil Brahmin/Iyer !!.
The OP author says:

What so, especially if the Girl is not serious about it.
What is the OP author really looking for? When he says the Girl herself thinks this is not good, what is he upto?
He wants to take selective replies from here and convince her and her family?
There are so many reasons why people dont get what they consider worthy of their life. This is just one. Move on man, there are many other options out there.

Dear Ozone,

wow, you are astonishing !!. Did I say go ahead forcibly ??. pl read my earlier post, I said if both of them love each other, then go ahead. if not, move on & not to waste time with people who are caste consicous.

& my question is that should this issue of caste be even relavant today !! should we not all make an effort to change this !!

PS: Specifically posted by a Tamil Brahmin/Iyer to ALL OTHER TAMIL BRAHMINS/IYERS HERE !!

Cheers,
JK

 

[ozone]

Dear Ozone,

wow, you are astonishing !!. Did I say go ahead forcibly ??. pl read my earlier post, I said if both of them love each other, then go ahead. if not, move on & not to waste time with people who are caste consicous.

& my question is that should this issue of caste be even relavant today !! should we not all make an effort to change this !!

PS: Specifically posted by a Tamil Brahmin/Iyer to ALL OTHER TAMIL BRAHMINS/IYERS HERE !!

Cheers,
JK

my comment is based on what you said

 

[C RAVI]

I am a Vishwa brahmin (gold smith, suparnarishi gothra) boy and i follow pure vegetarianism, suppose to wear punool (punool kalyanam not yet done. would be done before marriage), recite siva puranam every monday & saturday, follow oru pozhudu on every mondays, thursdays & saturday , follow fasting on siva rathiri and ekadesi..follow most of the brahma karmas.

I do like a brahmin iyer girl and i want to marry her. But people say I cannot marry because of different caste and she also believes it cannot happen because of caste.

The old vedic reference states that vishwa brahmin too are the descendants of brahmins and some point they have been demoted.

Vishwa brahmins does daily poojas, recite mantras etc.

I am true to God and holy. I am going to loose someone worth of my life for reasons of caste, eventhough I am more like them..( I feeling like the kid in A.I)

I want your views anywhich way it is. Please comment...!

Love and live with a girl who truly loves you for who you are. A girl who can join with your determinations of marrying each other, what may come, out of mutual trust and true love between each other.

If the girl can not take your decisions and determinations for granted and be courageous to hold your hands, then, it is either her lack of love towards you or she is too meek to step out to step in your life for ever.

Brother, don't listen to her excuses. Just get to know if she truly loves you and want you for her life. This is very important and sensible for you to see if your LOVE story is meaningful. Else don't break your head for any reasons for which the girl is hesitant.

Asking people's views here not gonna help you in any ways. It's only in the hands of the girl who is prepared to hang back in the name of Caste.

 

[Jaykay767]

my comment is based on what you said

well, it is really really sad that members are suggesting not to marry because of caste differences.

Nobody is saying marry forcibly, but if these 2 people love each other, then they should just go ahead. for godsake, Caste should not/must not/cannot become an issue in this age !!

 

[ozone]

well, it is really really sad that members are suggesting not to marry because of caste differences.

thats your conclusion. and that is what is really really really sad

 

[renuka]

All such questions should have been thought before falling in love..and not after falling in love.
If from the begining there was mutual attraction despite the odds..then why is there a problem now?

I feel if this question has cropped up may be one need to reconsider the decision for marriage.

Love isnt as blind as many think.

 

[C RAVI]

Love isnt as blind as many think.

Concealing the strong sense of wanting, many consider love is blind.
Concealing the motive of escaping for the better, many consider love is not blind.

The former reveals one's liking (for whatever reason, better known to self) and the determination to love a single person.

The later reveals one's stong rational brain and the determination to get the best deal.



The important thing is - "A true love between the two should never be foiled"
The rarest thing is - "A true love between the two"

 

[prasad1]

Let us be frank, and call a spade a spade. If the girl is falling in love before narriage she is not 20th century "Kanya". She is modern lady, why are we burdening her with 20th century values. Not knowing the level of commitment these two have, my post#2, Renuka, ravi, JK comes from the point of Love. It does involve sacrifices.
On the other hand Ozone come from traditionalist or may even be a pragmatist's position. That involves sacrificing Love,

If the parents are putting this kind of pressure, then they will loose their child.

 

[ozone]

Let us be frank, and call a spade a spade. If the girl is falling in love before narriage she is not 20th century "Kanya". She is modern lady, why are we burdening her with 20th century values. Not knowing the level of commitment these two have, my post#2, Renuka, ravi, JK comes from the point of Love. It does involve sacrifices.
On the other hand Ozone come from traditionalist or may even be a pragmatist's position. That involves sacrificing Love,

If the parents are putting this kind of pressure, then they will loose their child.

Please dont judge. Care to seek clarifications if you are in doubt. My point is coming purely from a point of not turning a non serious love (where both are interested) into a caste issue.

 

[prasad1]

Please dont judge. Care to seek clarifications if you are in doubt. My point is coming purely from a point of not turning a non serious love (where both are interested) into a caste issue.

Mr. Ozone I was not judging at all. Your position is very practical, and may be my position is more bollywood.
No worries brother I have no argument with you.