Complexity of living in flats of group housing societies

[krish44]

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I happened to have a flat in group housing society in chennai

I have been trying to come to terms with the office bearers who are incharge of running the day to day affairs and take care of security , utilities

and such issues

since I am an absentee landlord , my tenants keep into trouble with the society office bearers since I lease my flats only to singles prefarably

from north india


the society is intrusive and harasses these singles because they are north indians .

if the tenants are men , their lifestyle [read late nights and their boozing and music they turn on late evening when they party on weekends]

turns off the office bearers

if they are girl tenants, their boy friends visits raise eyebrows

these tenants it appears have no rights to privacy as they are closely watched as they are singles.

some girl l tenants I had were harassed and their image tarnished as they had some boy friends

I can understand if they create a nuisance they should be taken to task

the girls were told to not meet their boyfriends even at the gates of the society with threats of police complaint

the girls were forced to quit their flat

chennai society may be tradition bound . but to dictate how youngsters from other states should live and engage in moral policing

is going too far

now the society is insisting I should not give flats to singles

I think the society is going too far in spying on residents and deciding how they should live their lives

what do you think?

 

[fire]

We are not a liberal society and we may face such kind of problems in flats. Owners ,tenants may need to understand rules. We cannot change majority but need to adjust. Sometimes tenants also cross the line,say late night musics and disturbing others.

One of the major drawback on flat system is this. Any decision you cannot take on our own. We need to depend on others.

 

[tbs]

hi

i have a group housing society flat in delhi and chennai too....delhi ppl are more liberal....chennai are more conservative...

i had both problems.....

 

[vgane]

Krishji,

So long as they do not create nuisance to others and do not disturb peace, it should be OK..There are restrictions placed on bachelors even in North..Recently in one of the housing colonies in Ghaziabad (UP) there was exchange of fire between 2 groups of students and now the society has put restriction to bachelors being given flats

What is gun fire in Delhi is late night parties in Chennai..Both are taboos, but the severity is different in both the cases

 

[krish44]

Krishji,

So long as they do not create nuisance to others and do not disturb peace, it should be OK..There are restrictions placed on bachelors even in North..Recently in one of the housing colonies in Ghaziabad (UP) there was exchange of fire between 2 groups of students and now the society has put restriction to bachelors being given flats

What is gun fire in Delhi is late night parties in Chennai..Both are taboos, but the severity is different in both the cases

well chennai wants to attract top MNCs . those working would like to live in good flats with a decent life style .the girls who were there were from a top college and they were not in chennai by choice. they would have preferred bangalore. they were from decent families

to tarnish reputation of girls like this by lumpen outdated people who are a century behind in thinking disgusts me. chennai will fast cease to attract professionals
To intrude on privacy of strangers that too ladies and coercing and misbehaving with them sends bad signals to working community.

as a TB I felt very ashamed at this type of foolish behaviour of tamils .

now I have decided to dispose off this property and buy in bangalore instead. I would not like to live with neighbours like this anytime in life

It might be an over reaction but I am unable to come to terms with it

you know TB girls from outside tamilnadu shun alliiances from that state . in matrimoney sites they prefer bangalore ,mumbai , delhi NCR, pune etc

 

[kk4646]

well chennai wants to attract top MNCs . those working would like to live in good flats with a decent life style .the girls who were there were from a top college and they were not in chennai by choice. they would have preferred bangalore. they were from decent families

to tarnish reputation of girls like this by lumpen outdated people who are a century behind in thinking disgusts me. chennai will fast cease to attract professionals
To intrude on privacy of strangers that too ladies and coercing and misbehaving with them sends bad signals to working community.

as a TB I felt very ashamed at this type of foolish behaviour of tamils .

now I have decided to dispose off this property and buy in bangalore instead. I would not like to live with neighbours like this anytime in life

It might be an over reaction but I am unable to come to terms with it

you know TB girls from outside tamilnadu shun alliiances from that state . in matrimoney sites they prefer bangalore ,mumbai , delhi NCR, pune etc

"as a TB I felt very ashamed at this type of foolish behaviour of tamils ."


Dear Sir, This kind of remark from a TB member is unwelcome..I am living in a gated comunity in chennai and we too had problems with these kind of occupants who have taken rented accomadation... the owners have been informed and ocupants were asked to vacate.. Pl. let me know ..what is your defnition of decent life style..? is it running a drinking party on every Friday/ saturday night and dancing & singing with loud unbearable voices till midnight and beyond that..?..Is it your yardstick to define professionals..?..Yes..nobody can tolerate such behaviour from anybody if they wants to live in apartments whether it is Chennai or anyother place..
At present I am staying in Bangalore & that too in a multi storied complex with security arrangements.. I never find anyone creating nuicence to others and the association is very strict in dealing wth this kind of misbehaviours..So your contention that your occupants can have a way of life as YOU desires will not materialise in Bangalore too..

TVK

 

[vgane]

well chennai wants to attract top MNCs . those working would like to live in good flats with a decent life style .the girls who were there were from a top college and they were not in chennai by choice. they would have preferred bangalore. they were from decent families

to tarnish reputation of girls like this by lumpen outdated people who are a century behind in thinking disgusts me. chennai will fast cease to attract professionals
To intrude on privacy of strangers that too ladies and coercing and misbehaving with them sends bad signals to working community.

as a TB I felt very ashamed at this type of foolish behaviour of tamils .

now I have decided to dispose off this property and buy in bangalore instead. I would not like to live with neighbours like this anytime in life

It might be an over reaction but I am unable to come to terms with it

you know TB girls from outside tamilnadu shun alliiances from that state . in matrimoney sites they prefer bangalore ,mumbai , delhi NCR, pune etc

In the North, why is it easy for a South Indian to get a house..That is because we are well behaved, do not disturb others in the condominium by creating lot of noise in the form of late night parties, do not get into friction with others and also maintain the house well

Now since you have decided to give your flat only to Northies in Chennai, my suggestion is that you could have given the Do's & Don'ts to the tenants before giving your flat on lease..As informed by TVK, such tenants may be unwelcome in Bengaluru too!

 

[krish44]

dea sri TVK

I am only articulating the desires and aspirations of gennext.

if tamils cannot fulfill their needs good talent will fly away to better places which will meet their requirements substantially.

these professionals are highly paid and are employed after a rigorous testing and interviewing process .

these require avenues for rest and entertainment after a hard week of work. in places like bangalore with a decent night life they go to pubs which are

open past midnight. they can also get decent places for dinner and other entertainment. they have no language problems . the city is fairly safe.

there are areas like koramangala which are heavan for singles. they also enjoy a fair degree of privacy and freedom.local people are far more

tolerant . these fellows are big spenders. they require spending avenues which are lacking in chennai.

I have significant presence in bangalore. I can choose a place which suits me best . it is still a free country.
o
I live in a decent apartment block in delhi .I have no problem of nosey neighbours dictating my lifestyle

thanks for pointing out that I cannot have my way in bangalore.

I shall make my choice of place of stay keeping this in view

KRISH44

 

[[email protected]]

The bad experiences of few occupants create this havoc. I live in Delhi (cooperative group housing flat) and I was the elected President for 3 years till recently. It is my experience facing such issues on a regular basis - I was under constant pressure from residents to pass resolution to prohibit giving out flats by owners to bachelors/ single tenants. I was dead against such practice but made it a rule for the owners to come and meet with the office bearers (either President or Secretary) along with prospective tenants for a chat. This rule against was applicable to all (families or bachelors). Mostly, educated class in metro cities understand and are accomodative. The only strict rule which was followed is not to allow flats to be given as guest houses/ service apartments. In all the issue is, making certain rules which will weed out unwanted elements. This is a common problem with renting but one can find a middle ground

 

[sarang]

Tenants who create problems are unwelcome in any housing society, unless it is for young noisy lot only. Then they will fight among themselves. Many societies in pune too, do not want bachelors of either sex who can become a problem, unless they come with good references. With the new bomb culture, landlords and society board members are partly responsible for the behaviour of tenants, and have to store copies of passport, lease agreement etc. in the society office. This attitude, my tenant will lead a life as he chooses, but the permanent residents have to put up with all the nuisance, is sheer lunacy and will not be tolerated.

What is the need to bring TB in this discussion, when even the basic TB values are made fun of by the self proclaimed pseudo brahmins. Any landlord who lets his flat to a lousy tenant can be censured by the housing society members. There are societies here with sizable occupancy by foreigners, students and well employed singles, and the police has to visit them at all hours of the day, as the minority owner occupiers have a terrible time.

If single male and female tenants do hanky panky, parents with young children do object and want the offending tenants to vacate. Happened in our society, with one MNC employed couple shouting - we don't want brothels here.

Normal peace loving quiet mind your business type youngsters do not face problems from neighbours and the society management.

 

[krish44]

society is changing fast.
those with outdated ideas and beliefs that all singles are problems and create scare stories associating educated youngsters with bomb culture besides suspecting all ladies as potential prostitutes reflects a mind set which is not reflective of actual ground situation

a new order where such elements will be swept away to old age homes is fast developing in south india .it is a matter of time

their own children fed up with them will get rid of them. many TBs among tamils not in tune with the times are facing this harsh reality

 

[prasad1]

The op in my opinion was not about TB. It was pointing out the different lifestyles of North Indians in Tamil Nadu. The intrusive nature of TN group hosing societies.
He was frustrated by the cultural differences. It is a comment about the cultural practice. It is an honest observation, so why attack the poster?

 

[Raji Ram]

It is always better to be a Roman in Rome. People will never appreciate late night parties with loud music anywhere in Chennai!

Many of us have appreciated the scene in the movie 'enthiran', where the robot goes and breaks the music system of the guys
making loud noise. :drum:

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Krish Sir,

You seem to curse the tambram oldies to land in old age homes! In fact, the age for entering a 'home' is now

only 55 in many places! So, the younger oldies [ ] enjoy their 'freedom' as much as the youngsters enjoy!!

P.S: One lady member of our forum had posted a few videos of one of their jolly trips from such a 'home'! :dance:

 

[sarang]

Ha! Ha! The couple who objected to the partying crowd are neither Tamil nor brahmins.

society is changing fast.
those with outdated ideas and beliefs that all singles are problems and create scare stories associating educated youngsters with bomb culture besides suspecting all ladies as potential prostitutes reflects a mind set which is not reflective of actual ground situation

a new order where such elements will be swept away to old age homes is fast developing in south india .it is a matter of time

their own children fed up with them will get rid of them. many TBs among tamils not in tune with the times are facing this harsh reality

 

[krish44]

Dear Krish Sir,

You seem to curse the tambram oldies to land in old age homes! In fact, the age for entering a 'home' is now

only 55 in many places! So, the younger oldies [ ] enjoy their 'freedom' as much as the youngsters enjoy!!

P.S: One lady member of our forum had posted a few videos of one of their jolly trips from such a 'home'! :dance:

you know RRJi

I promptly took it up with the lady and she was kind enough to book room for me there for a short stay of couple of days

unfortunately I fell sick and could not make it

however she kept in touch with me during her visit to bangalore.

I am naturally attracted if someone says one could enjoy freedom in an old age home in india.

this was done more out of curiousity.

I would have liked to have an experience of it

simiilarly made a trip to shirdhi and nasik very recently . I am not much of a believer though. again to see what make

people opt for such a course of action

As regards the chennai flat tenants I felt really bad that some highly educated girls starting their life as working girls in a good MNC and trying to be self

sufficient in a flat without knowing the local lingo were victimised by the society for meeting a boy knowing hindi and

tamil trying to help them. in fact the society wanted the girls to lodge a complaint against the boy falsely with the police

to book him which they rightly refused. then they started threatening and tarnishing their name.They finallyl moved out

unable to take it anymore. it was sheer goondaism against helpless girls. in north the office bearers would have been

thrashed.it is intolerance in all extremity. they were neither partying or playing loud music.










since society office bearers wanted to settle some personal score with the boy for something else which happened in

the past tried sucking in the innocent girls into their fight. . it is the girls version and

could be wrong. character assassination of girls is not tamil culture in any case. if their parents had got involved it would

have been a bigger mess.It is difficult to be a single working girl in chennai


.

 

[tbs]

hi

chennai is chennai...dilli is dilli... a lot of changes are happening...still chennai is culturally very different from other metros...

still many are very conservative....not so liberal...

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Krish Sir,

The episode you have written above should be because of the boy who was in bad records of the office bearers. There are

many hostels for working women and also some girls take apartments for rent. I don't think this happens to all the girls from

the North. The Chennai-ites respect women folk and I think women are more safe in this metro.

 

[krish44]

in a few years chennai will become another west bengal.

industries will be war of setting up anything there .

there will be flight of technical talent for better pastures elsewhere

there is only the migration of poor labour from ,mostly jharkand ,west bengal ,north east into security , hospitality and

construction fields displacing the locals a friction point for the future.

still a good edu. hub for northerners and a poor work place dueto issues relating to place of stay and local lingo.

 

[tbs]

in a few years chennai will become another west bengal.

industries will be war of setting up anything there .

there will be flight of technical talent for better pastures elsewhere

there is only the migration of poor labour from ,mostly jharkand ,west bengal ,north east into security , hospitality and

construction fields displacing the locals a friction point for the future.

still a good edu. hub for northerners and a poor work place dueto issues relating to place of stay and local lingo.

hi

many private engg collages are filled with andhraites/northerners.....cheap and best quality...when compare to north...

many collage hostels are filled with north indian rich students...holli festival is celebrating in all hostels....many single

north indian gals are working in IT companies....we can see a lot of north indian guys/ gals on the beaches of chennai

on sundays....

 

[[email protected]]

Sir this is a common problem with societies (and gated colonies). I live in Delhi in a cooperative group housing society with 165 flats. I was an elected President of the Society till recently and took a break after two terms as office bearer (it is taxing, no doubt). We too encounter such problems but a blanket ban on giving flats to singles/ bachelors is something which I was against and we never practiced it. Of course, there was phenomenal pressure from residents on this issue. The only rule kept for owners who want to rent out their flats is : NO SERVICE APARTMENT/ NO GUEST HOUSE.. We devised a good practice and mechanism and it worked and is working. But yes, once in a while, there could be genuine problems with some occupants..

 

[rishikesan]

Dear friends, I have just read the full comments & varied opinions/ comments mostly South / Tamil ians Vs Bangaloreans/ North Indians Etc. All irksome problems have come up in all gated community flats, & this cannot be arrested. Let us become broad- minded & realise the culture difference , even the way of behaviour of our own tamil , working girls in places like bangalore Delhi Etc. In these days week-end parties are common depending on the groups getting formed in the work places, meaning that Tamil Boys/ Girls would also be a part of that groups & the modern life style has changed & no one can grouse. Our own grand children also in the groups & doing things which the parents would not like , but not only tolerate but keep a watch , to ensure that everything is in limits.
Major reason for we, T.B do not like basically any other language speaking Guys, because we know not Hindi to speak . For those who can speak hindi , this type of irritants mentioned will not only vanish & we can be friendlt with ALL . This is also coming up fast. Ihope a few of you written negative points can analyse my write-up & offer useful Suggestions , keeping in view the Intolerence of T. B, in nt mixing with others in the Society.
Rishikesan