Dosha in Horoscope Meaning, significance and implications- Query

[kunjuppu]

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... In the Tamil I speak we are generally very respectful (I was told it is Brahmin Tamil), I am not used to hearing Anda, andi, poda, podi etc. even in intimate circle.

...

dear ada and adi...can be used as a term of endearment, but only in very intimate circle - spouse, siblings or close friends. i said 'can be' only because it is a mutual thing, and the other person too does the same.

re brahmin tamil, within the community we are ok, but are known for disrespect right from our servants to everyone else. even mrs K, i have to tell her, to address maids and auto rickshaw drivers as neenga vaanga ponga..and not nee vaa po.

p.s. krishnan, has noted in iyengar families of tamil nadu (and iyers too i would imagine) an eight year old, will address the servant by first name - amavasai! kuppai!..and such. it took periyar to dispel this habit, among this generation, and provide dignity of address.

we had a handy boy...we always addressed him as 'gundu paiyyan'. i never knew his real name. i always have feelers raised, when someone claims some particular caste dialect is 'respectful'...especially ours.

as a rule, i have seen NBs in madras, address servants as anney or akka...as a rule that is. we would never address our maids as akka. even now.

 

[கால பைரவன்]

"Hey" is not disrespectful. It is just a slight modification of "Hi", a friendly way of addressing people, quite commonly used in US. Americans come up with all kinds of slangs - for example "yeah" or "yup" for yes. The word used is nothing when compared to what normally goes on in this forum. Therefore, it is very amusing to see some reactions here.

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Prasad Sir,

My dad was the eldest of four brothers and only in our family, appA and ammA are addressed with respect - 'neenga'.

Others say that it shows some distance if we address with respect! Dad never addressed mom / any of us girls with

'di' added. He called all of us 'mA' only. In Ram's family only Ram and his younger brother call the spouse with added

'mA' while all others add 'di'!!

I used to think the word 'Orpadi' was coined to add disrespect to the co-sister! (co-sisters are women whose spouses

are brothers) where as 'nAththanAr' sounds respecful (nAththanAr is husband's sister)!!

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Kunjuppu Sir,

In many tambrams and KLBs families, calling 'vAdA', 'vAdi' etc is very common. Some add many words like 'saniyan',

'paNdAram', 'theevetti dhadiyan', 'gundan', 'brahmahaththi' etc effortlessly! One thAthA used to call his grandson as

'kArkOdagA' and that four year old used to say, 'ThAththA enna kAkOgadA cholluvA', with a big grin on his face!

Many NBs in Sing Chennai also talk like this but with different special words like, 'BemAni', 'kasumAlam', 'savu kerAkki'!! :dizzy:

 

[prasad1]

Thanks for sharing Rajiji.
When we(from NI) used to visit Chennai and listen to the ricksawallah, or sabjiwali talking in that derogatory tone we used to feel offended. It never used to bother my cousins from chennai. I think you get used to that tone and culture if you stay in chennai long enough.

Even doing business in North India is different than in chennai. The sari shop will go out of their way to show you sari's, they will even drape on show the materials, even if you say I am not buying. There usual comment will be bhanji deke lo, kharidna jaroori nahi hai. In Nalli you walk in the first thing they will say how much are you willing to spend. It is different.

 

[kunjuppu]

dear raji,

among immediate family i think, nee naan vaada poda has a level of intimacy not experienced with vaango pongo. i used to address my parents with vaango pongo. same with my sis.

whereas, my mom, used to address her parents nee vaa po.

i know a 8 year old girl who used to address a couple, in their 70s, in service of their family for long time, by name, kesava and munimma. and nee vaa po. my suggestions for honorofic addresses were ignored by the girl, and the parents apparently agreed with their daughter.

 

[sangom]

dear raji,

among immediate family i think, nee naan vaada poda has a level of intimacy not experienced with vaango pongo. i used to address my parents with vaango pongo. same with my sis.

whereas, my mom, used to address her parents nee vaa po.

i know a 8 year old girl who used to address a couple, in their 70s, in service of their family for long time, by name, kesava and munimma. and nee vaa po. my suggestions for honorofic addresses were ignored by the girl, and the parents apparently agreed with their daughter.

Honorific addressing reflects, in a way, the better upbringing of a person. When I first went to Kanpur I found the brahmins addressing their children like āo, jāo, etc., but some others of a financially higher level landlords addressing their grandchildren as āiye, jāiye. I was surprised but then one old man, who was my colleague, told me that when children grow up hearing such polished talk even from their elders in the house, they won't need special instructions for being equally polite and well-behaved with strangers, class mates, etc. That appealed to me. However, it was not possible to use the same rule in our house and tell our sons vAngO, pOngO, etc., but we (myself and my wife) used to avoid the direct vA, vADA, pODA, etc., and use vAyEn etc., as far as possible.

 

[Raji Ram]

My nephew when he was three years old, once got upset with his father and shouted at him 'pOdA' in anger.

His mom immediately told him that he should respect his father and say 'ingO' and the kid shouted, 'pOdAngO'!

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Prasad Sir,

The Sing. Chennai cloth shops ask for our budget / type of material, only to show the stuff from relevant shelves.

But there is the 'bONi' business which will drive us mad! Once I entered a famous cloth shop in T'nagar very early

to avoid the mad crowd. I happened to be the first customer and so all the staff, a dozen in number stared at me,

making me nervous! Soon one guy told me in a rough tone, 'ammA! neenga kattAyam oru pudavai vAngaNum!
neengathAn muthal bONi!'. I really got :scared: !!

 

[zebra16]

In Marathi language you miss that notion of respect..

How?

It has three degrees of address like "tu" - for children and juniors; "tumhi" for equals or friends etc. and "apaN" for elders and other respectful persons.

 

[zebra16]

Hey sangom,

The easiest thing Sri Einsteintutor could have done would be to replicate Sri Sangom's method and replied without any salutation.

The ideal thing would have been to observe how Sri Praveen and Sri KRS (the owner and super moderator respectively) addressed the members posts even while responding to antagonistic posts and provocative posts and to emulate it.

 

[sarang]

Old tamil movie dialogue:
appa: veeta vittu veliya poda naye.
pillai: veetai kaththu kidada naye.

My nephew when he was three years old, once got upset with his father and shouted at him 'pOdA' in anger.

His mom immediately told him that he should respect his father and say 'ingO' and the kid shouted, 'pOdAngO'!

 

[prasad1]

"tumh" in hindi is not respectful. In Northern India, you address strangers and elders as "aapp" and "tumh" is only addressed towards some one you want to feel it.