Vaagmi
0
A forward I have received from a friend of me:
LIVING HAPPILY AFTER RETIREMENT
I am thankful to the Chembur Senior Citizens’ Association for
offering me a chance to be with all of you this evening. I regret
that I shall begin with a funeral reference. Since death is but part
of Life I shall recount this charming story.
In a tiny village in Kerala, a devout Christian breathed his last
and the local priest being out of station, a priest from an adjoining
village was called upon to deliver the funeral oration. “Ladies and
Gentlemen”, began the venerable pastor with the dead body in a
coffin before him, “Here lies dead before me a rare human being
of this village with outstanding qualities. He was a gentleman, a
scholar, sweet of tongue, gentle of temper and very catholic in
outlook. He was generous to a fault and ever smiling”. The widow
of the deceased stood up at the end of the Hall and screamed,
“O ! God ! They are burying the wrong man. ”
A similar doubt can reasonably arise in my wife’s mind about
the qualities of my head and heart eloquently praised by the
previous speaker.
Now, I will revert to the subject allotted to me, “Living Happily
After Retirement”. Retirement is a problem peculiar to our
generation. In the times of our fathers and grandfathers,
retirement was not much of a problem.
There are three reasons for this.
First, Life Expectancy.
Fifty years ago, the life expectancy at the age of retirement
fixed at 55--was 60. A study of Government records revealed
that very few people enjoyed pension for more than five years
at that time. Most people died before sixty and consequently
spending five years after retirement did not pose any major
problem.
Today Life Expectancy at retirement at 58 or 60-- is 75 years
which means half of your working life is still left after retirement.
To give you an example two Senior Officers of RBI died at 93
years—35 years after retirement.
The second reason is the change in the family structure.
Half a century ago most people were in a joint family. The day you
laid down office, you still had a large family around you. Surely, in
a large family there was always something you could do that was
meaningful and made you feel you were contributing to the family.
Today the family has become nuclear—husband, wife, children. By
the time one retires, the children have gone away. In good old
times, daughters used to get married and promptly go away.
Nowadays sons get married and shift on and for First Night itself !
What is left is the old couple—You for Me and Me for you. This is
not particularly easy to accept and adjust to after retirement.
The third reason is the problem of “Roots.”
In halcyon days, people used to have a “native place” and
an “ancestral home”. They looked forward to going there and
settling down after retirement. Today except for Leave Fare
Concession purposes, there is nothing left in terms of native
place. People often are confused as to where to settle.
These three problems make retirement planning a crucial item.
If you have planned for retirement you can anticipate and tackle
these problems. People are not accustomed to the idea of staying
by themselves. If one asks an audience of prospective retirees
and their wives “How many of you expect to stay after retirement
with your children, hardly one hand goes up. If some husband
raises his hand, his wife immediately slaps it down saying,
“I’ll be damned if I am going to stay with my daughter-in-law!”
So it is a tough problem to think about old people staying—just
the two of them. This makes planning all the more significant.
The most difficult problem that we face after
retirement is the psychological one.
When an executive retires, he is at the peak of his career—his
status, prestige and financial acumen. The moment he lays down
office, all these desert him. He discovers that “Everything becomes
Less and Less”. The first thing he notices is the way his status and
prestige are affected. Even at home, the retired person is no longer
the important person. If he demands of his wife an early breakfast,
she will promptly admonish him, “You are retired now. So take it
easy. Let those employed go first !”. He is no longer “Numero Uno”.
A friend of mine who was a Senior Executive in RBI was getting
500 Greeting Cards and Diaries for the New Year. After one year of
retirement it dwindled to fifty and this year he got ten. Greeting
cards and diaries are surely an indicator of the respect you are
held in.
The most immediate problem on retirement is
time-arrangement.
We all have twenty four hours at our disposal, whether we
like it or not. When you are a Senior Executive you work for
ten, twelve or even fifteen hours and you feel “Suppose I had
two hours more how nice it would be!. Life would be easier.”
After retirement we have twenty four hours and nothing to do!
Result – misery and this is one thing one likes to spread! No man
wants to be miserable alone. He will make as many people
miserable as he can. A man who has nothing to do will harass
people around him. Turning on head the Benthamite principle of
maximization of welfare—maximisation of ill-fare!.
There are two solutions to this problem.
One is to continue to do the same work one was doing at
the time of retirement.
The first option is very convenient but where is such an opportunity
for the majority? There is the temptation to wangle out an extension
but this does lead to compromising principles which many succumb
to regrettably. I have seen Senior Officers accepting jobs as liaison
officers and standing outside the cabin of their subordinates and seek
favours from them. But how long-lasting is the solution. Extension
merely postpones the problem. It crops up again quite swiftly.
The second option is to do something different, i.e., option to
get another job.
An executive can get another job provided he is willing to sacrifice
self-respect. Generally jobs are given by the previous employer’s
suppliers. Cases are legion where army, navy, air force officers are
caught for espionage in such employment. In commercial
organizations Officers are employed to get orders and collect bills
speedily from their erstwhile Employers. So you will agree that this
is no solution.
All of you are aware that the Bard of Avon-- William Shakespeare
wrote of the “Seven Stages of Man”. Modern psychologists have
abridged it to four and these are thus.
Before finding a girl—Spiderman
After engagement------Superman
10 years after marriage-Watchman
20 years after marriage - Doberman
After this lighter side I revert to post-retired life. The retired
official is likely to fall into four dysfunctional time options.
The first is “Withdrawal”.
Many retired people, the day they retire from Office withdraw
from Life and within a few months they just pass away. When
you ask a Doctor he will tell you I can give a Medical term but
this is case of “simple lack of will to live”.
The second time management option is “ritual”.
A person can create a ritual for himself. He gets up at a specific
time, does different activities at a specific time and this invariably
results in misery for others if that specific time frame is not
adhered to. While he has in essence nothing to do, he is trying to
make his activities meaningful. This leads to a meaningless ritual.
The third option is Pastime.
Many people get together and embark on a combined ritual
which is called pastime. This too does not add to the meaningfulness
of life.
The last option turns out to be even mischievous. It is
playing games—
not physical ones like badminton, tennis but psychological ones
where you try to manipulate people, get into their problems,
complicate them and generally enlarge the tension around you.
Many a respectable person indulges in this and creates problems
where none existed.
The alternative to these are Functional options.
The first is become a Consultant.
Lurking inside every executive is a Consultant. But for this
considerable expertise is required. All are not Consultants.
The second option is to start your own Business or industry.
But this calls for entrepreneurial qualities which an executive may
lack. Many are the cases where lakhs of rupees have turned into
thousands!.
The third option is to involve oneself in professional
activities.
For this one must build up one’s position even before retirement.
Many cliques operate to prevent outsiders from encroachment.
The fourth is to get into spiritual activities.
While nobody is required between you and God, nowadays, we
find more and more godmen, swamijis, pseudo Gurus some
even US returned. There is a temptation to follow some Swamiji or
even become one yourself. This is a very slippery slope.
Beware –there are more hoaxes in the religious field than
anywhere else!.
The last and most meaningful option is to cultivate a Hobby.
Use your creative abilities and do something that you enjoy
doing. You should start this even while in service.
contd.....
LIVING HAPPILY AFTER RETIREMENT
I am thankful to the Chembur Senior Citizens’ Association for
offering me a chance to be with all of you this evening. I regret
that I shall begin with a funeral reference. Since death is but part
of Life I shall recount this charming story.
In a tiny village in Kerala, a devout Christian breathed his last
and the local priest being out of station, a priest from an adjoining
village was called upon to deliver the funeral oration. “Ladies and
Gentlemen”, began the venerable pastor with the dead body in a
coffin before him, “Here lies dead before me a rare human being
of this village with outstanding qualities. He was a gentleman, a
scholar, sweet of tongue, gentle of temper and very catholic in
outlook. He was generous to a fault and ever smiling”. The widow
of the deceased stood up at the end of the Hall and screamed,
“O ! God ! They are burying the wrong man. ”
A similar doubt can reasonably arise in my wife’s mind about
the qualities of my head and heart eloquently praised by the
previous speaker.
Now, I will revert to the subject allotted to me, “Living Happily
After Retirement”. Retirement is a problem peculiar to our
generation. In the times of our fathers and grandfathers,
retirement was not much of a problem.
There are three reasons for this.
First, Life Expectancy.
Fifty years ago, the life expectancy at the age of retirement
fixed at 55--was 60. A study of Government records revealed
that very few people enjoyed pension for more than five years
at that time. Most people died before sixty and consequently
spending five years after retirement did not pose any major
problem.
Today Life Expectancy at retirement at 58 or 60-- is 75 years
which means half of your working life is still left after retirement.
To give you an example two Senior Officers of RBI died at 93
years—35 years after retirement.
The second reason is the change in the family structure.
Half a century ago most people were in a joint family. The day you
laid down office, you still had a large family around you. Surely, in
a large family there was always something you could do that was
meaningful and made you feel you were contributing to the family.
Today the family has become nuclear—husband, wife, children. By
the time one retires, the children have gone away. In good old
times, daughters used to get married and promptly go away.
Nowadays sons get married and shift on and for First Night itself !
What is left is the old couple—You for Me and Me for you. This is
not particularly easy to accept and adjust to after retirement.
The third reason is the problem of “Roots.”
In halcyon days, people used to have a “native place” and
an “ancestral home”. They looked forward to going there and
settling down after retirement. Today except for Leave Fare
Concession purposes, there is nothing left in terms of native
place. People often are confused as to where to settle.
These three problems make retirement planning a crucial item.
If you have planned for retirement you can anticipate and tackle
these problems. People are not accustomed to the idea of staying
by themselves. If one asks an audience of prospective retirees
and their wives “How many of you expect to stay after retirement
with your children, hardly one hand goes up. If some husband
raises his hand, his wife immediately slaps it down saying,
“I’ll be damned if I am going to stay with my daughter-in-law!”
So it is a tough problem to think about old people staying—just
the two of them. This makes planning all the more significant.
The most difficult problem that we face after
retirement is the psychological one.
When an executive retires, he is at the peak of his career—his
status, prestige and financial acumen. The moment he lays down
office, all these desert him. He discovers that “Everything becomes
Less and Less”. The first thing he notices is the way his status and
prestige are affected. Even at home, the retired person is no longer
the important person. If he demands of his wife an early breakfast,
she will promptly admonish him, “You are retired now. So take it
easy. Let those employed go first !”. He is no longer “Numero Uno”.
A friend of mine who was a Senior Executive in RBI was getting
500 Greeting Cards and Diaries for the New Year. After one year of
retirement it dwindled to fifty and this year he got ten. Greeting
cards and diaries are surely an indicator of the respect you are
held in.
The most immediate problem on retirement is
time-arrangement.
We all have twenty four hours at our disposal, whether we
like it or not. When you are a Senior Executive you work for
ten, twelve or even fifteen hours and you feel “Suppose I had
two hours more how nice it would be!. Life would be easier.”
After retirement we have twenty four hours and nothing to do!
Result – misery and this is one thing one likes to spread! No man
wants to be miserable alone. He will make as many people
miserable as he can. A man who has nothing to do will harass
people around him. Turning on head the Benthamite principle of
maximization of welfare—maximisation of ill-fare!.
There are two solutions to this problem.
One is to continue to do the same work one was doing at
the time of retirement.
The first option is very convenient but where is such an opportunity
for the majority? There is the temptation to wangle out an extension
but this does lead to compromising principles which many succumb
to regrettably. I have seen Senior Officers accepting jobs as liaison
officers and standing outside the cabin of their subordinates and seek
favours from them. But how long-lasting is the solution. Extension
merely postpones the problem. It crops up again quite swiftly.
The second option is to do something different, i.e., option to
get another job.
An executive can get another job provided he is willing to sacrifice
self-respect. Generally jobs are given by the previous employer’s
suppliers. Cases are legion where army, navy, air force officers are
caught for espionage in such employment. In commercial
organizations Officers are employed to get orders and collect bills
speedily from their erstwhile Employers. So you will agree that this
is no solution.
All of you are aware that the Bard of Avon-- William Shakespeare
wrote of the “Seven Stages of Man”. Modern psychologists have
abridged it to four and these are thus.
Before finding a girl—Spiderman
After engagement------Superman
10 years after marriage-Watchman
20 years after marriage - Doberman
After this lighter side I revert to post-retired life. The retired
official is likely to fall into four dysfunctional time options.
The first is “Withdrawal”.
Many retired people, the day they retire from Office withdraw
from Life and within a few months they just pass away. When
you ask a Doctor he will tell you I can give a Medical term but
this is case of “simple lack of will to live”.
The second time management option is “ritual”.
A person can create a ritual for himself. He gets up at a specific
time, does different activities at a specific time and this invariably
results in misery for others if that specific time frame is not
adhered to. While he has in essence nothing to do, he is trying to
make his activities meaningful. This leads to a meaningless ritual.
The third option is Pastime.
Many people get together and embark on a combined ritual
which is called pastime. This too does not add to the meaningfulness
of life.
The last option turns out to be even mischievous. It is
playing games—
not physical ones like badminton, tennis but psychological ones
where you try to manipulate people, get into their problems,
complicate them and generally enlarge the tension around you.
Many a respectable person indulges in this and creates problems
where none existed.
The alternative to these are Functional options.
The first is become a Consultant.
Lurking inside every executive is a Consultant. But for this
considerable expertise is required. All are not Consultants.
The second option is to start your own Business or industry.
But this calls for entrepreneurial qualities which an executive may
lack. Many are the cases where lakhs of rupees have turned into
thousands!.
The third option is to involve oneself in professional
activities.
For this one must build up one’s position even before retirement.
Many cliques operate to prevent outsiders from encroachment.
The fourth is to get into spiritual activities.
While nobody is required between you and God, nowadays, we
find more and more godmen, swamijis, pseudo Gurus some
even US returned. There is a temptation to follow some Swamiji or
even become one yourself. This is a very slippery slope.
Beware –there are more hoaxes in the religious field than
anywhere else!.
The last and most meaningful option is to cultivate a Hobby.
Use your creative abilities and do something that you enjoy
doing. You should start this even while in service.
contd.....
