Status of the Children living with their parents vs in Residential Schools

[Sundarananda]

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Dear Friends,
One my friend wanted to put his son in the Residential school in Hydradbad and he lives in Bangalore. He quotes the reason that it is good for the child to focus, concentrate, Study and thereby he is disciplined and will get Very good Marks in his SSLC exams and in Degree etc. So that he is sure to be successful in his life.

Friends, which is good children living their parents or grow in the Residential School from their very young age.

It remembers me about the Gurukula in ancient days, where children live with their Gurus, study, do seva and learn. In comparable to todays conditions, how far the children learn the discipline. Are they not missing the parent Love, Care.

In my opinion the Residential School can be looked at for the children, where their parents has misunderstanding, everyday quarrels / Don't have time for their children, Divorced, living with second husband or second wife.
The parents who can provide time and care to their children, inject values, should not send their children to Residential Schools.

Leaving it to Forum to come up with more insights.

PS: My Friend can give his time to his child and no emotional problems at home. He is well off and his main ambition is that his child should get MORE MARKS and disciplined.

Warm Regards,
Sundarananda

 

[C RAVI]

If parents make periodical visits, say every weekend and spend good time with the kid, I believe, boarding schools would not be a bad option at all, as far as shaping the kid is concerend, to make him/her highly competent and be focused right from schooling till his/her journey of professional practices continues, dwelling high.

At the same time, the charm of living with the family in a safe/secured and peaceful home environment can never be ruled out.

Both the options may have some pros and cons. The end result should be that, the kids should have a joyful, peaceful and secured environment through out the learning and growing process and should not end up blaming parents for something that they feel they have been deprived of.

As far as the case study in the OP is concerned, I believe the father (& probably the mother too) who can spare time for his son and ensure peaceful and happy home environment, can well avoid placing his son in residential school. A kid can be trained well and expected to score Hight Marks and be desciplined even by growing up in a desciplined home environment.

 

[renuka]

Dear Friends,
One my friend wanted to put his son in the Residential school in Hydradbad and he lives in Bangalore. He quotes the reason that it is good for the child to focus, concentrate, Study and thereby he is disciplined and will get Very good Marks in his SSLC exams and in Degree etc. So that he is sure to be successful in his life.

Friends, which is good children living their parents or grow in the Residential School from their very young age.

It remembers me about the Gurukula in ancient days, where children live with their Gurus, study, do seva and learn. In comparable to todays conditions, how far the children learn the discipline. Are they not missing the parent Love, Care.

In my opinion the Residential School can be looked at for the children, where their parents has misunderstanding, everyday quarrels / Don't have time for their children, Divorced, living with second husband or second wife.
The parents who can provide time and care to their children, inject values, should not send their children to Residential Schools.

Leaving it to Forum to come up with more insights.

PS: My Friend can give his time to his child and no emotional problems at home. He is well off and his main ambition is that his child should get MORE MARKS and disciplined.

Warm Regards,
Sundarananda

Its mainly an Indian phenomenon.Out here is Malaysia no one sends children to residential schools as there are hardly any too.

I dont know why but it is not something I would consider for my son cos I would want him to have parental love and emotional support and freedom too.

Residential schools are too strict I feel and at times too much emphasis of academic excellence but not really instilling human values as much.

I feel too rigid curriculum at an early age at times does curb creativity and we have more of a click,copy and paste type of individuals.
Dont know how good is that in the long run.

 

[kunjuppu]

ananda,

that is indeed a nice mugshot of yours!

back to the subject. i dont know why we have to invoke the distant past of gurukulam. it is irrelevant in today's world.

i look upon my children as gifts from God. each one is a treasure, and if i consider myself rich, it is only because i look upon each child as a treasure.

why would i want to leave him/her to the care of strangers, whose influences, God knows what, will prevail on their lives.

i would like my children, long after i am gone, if they come across issues, atleast refer to my comments and advices, as opposed to looking up in a book or recalling something from their hostel masters.

the growing up period of a child, is the most pleasurable period of a parent. the first days of school, the teenage angst, the homework help or distress at unable to help, puberty, and so much more. why deprive ourselves of all this?

your friend, in sending his child to a hostel, is losing everything in this life, the reason that he brought into this world, another life.

i would consider him, among the most ignorant in the world. please try to change his mind.

ps..i am quite sure his son does not want to go to a hostel.

pps.. let him not expect affection and love from his son at a later age, for what is not given when young, cannot be expected back, when old.

 

[sarma-61]

It is a question of money and status, at least in India. Ordinary, middle- and lower middle- class parents cannot afford the expense and they should not desire that their children should be sent to residential schools. Rich people will send to residential schools where their children will grow imbibing the western culture like non-vegetarian food, eating with fork and spoon, drinking, free sex both inside and outside the school etc. If the child gets into some very bad criminal case also the parents' money power will save them to become "great" personalities. Look at Nehru family and many similar people.

 

[prasad1]

Life is a big challenge. In today’s competitive world children who boldly face the challenges of life alone wins. Boarding schools have succeeded in creating a strong mental framework among students that will help them in the long run. Children learn the lessons of self-reliance and care for others from the boarding schools. Boarding schools can be considered as a mini-university of life where children from different backgrounds stay together. The first lesson a child learns from boarding schools is the lesson of adaptation. They make themselves adapt to the new environment, which is completely strange to them. This lesson is the primary and important lesson of life. It is one of the key ingredients of success in life. It helps the student to grow up as matured persons without any adaptation problems.
Another advantage of boarding schools is that they will enable the students to grow up as a self-reliant person. Since they live away from parents and dear ones students will learn to tackle their problems independently. Self-reliance contributes a lot in the development of a successful human being. This will help students to cultivate self-respect within them. All these contribute in the growth of confident persons who believe in themselves.
Indian boarding schools provide the students with a vast opportunity to engage in a variety of extra-curricular activities. This will exploit the hidden talents of the students to the maximum. By the end of their school period, they will be groomed into matured persons who are able to take the apt decision regarding their career. The various curricular and co-curricular activities will enable the students to recognize their aptitude and talents. Boarding schools act as a foster home for students. A boarding school alumnus is able to tackle any critical situation in their life with the help of practical knowledge they gained from their school life.

Read more: Advantages and Disadvantages of Boarding Schools | Socyberty


Advantage #1: Academic Excellence
Advantage #2: Mentoring Relationships
Advantage #3: Personal Growth
Advantage #4: A Celebration of Diversity
The Boarding School Advantage - CollegeBound.net

Why Boarding School? - Boarding School Review
Every parent has to make decision for the best interest of their children. We may not know all the constraint the parents have, who are we to judge the parents decision. We may speculate the reasons but we will never know the true circumstance. So better be careful, your children may have to make the same decision someday.

There are children in remote villages with no good school in the vicinity. Boarding school is the only option for them.

In my class in Engineering school there were about 10 students from a prestigious boarding school. They were very smart, brilliant, resourceful, all leaders. They came from very poor background, and lower caste. The school groomed them to be leaders. They were very successful in life. Their alumni was very strong. Their family life was also very good, but they could not have been as successful with just village school.