TB guys marrying Non Indian/Non Hindu girls.

[prasad1]

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Dear Sister Renu Ji,

So whose fault it is? Any man who keeps quiet when his mother is vilified is a no man at all. And any man who does not speak up for his wife when she is attacked is no man at all also.

Regards,
KRS

Well said

 

[amala]

Dear Renu,

Thanks so much for starting this surprising thread. I never expected you too! I was thinking the same yesterday myself with regards to " how come so many wonderful members in this forum give such wonderful suggestions to theblues to get her TB man"

Had it been a TB girl and as Ravi has clearly said Chennai/Tamil Nadu/India residing TB girl, no way jose can she come to this TB site and ask suggestions from us good members on how to impress/get her NB guy and his mum. No way. The good people here will pounce on her and tear her apart and blame her for the unmarried TB guys crisis.

So dear Renu. You see the problem is quite simple. For TB girls in India they cannot marry NB. Apparently too many are. But TB guys in India can marry anyone! Coz the situation is like this: Thank God, they are at least getting married!

 

[renuka]

aren't you the one who once remarked - 'I make things happen' or something like that? may be not

Dear Ozone,

Aiyooo Rama...thats not me yaar that was Yamaka and then I replied the infamous analogy and it went out of flow from then on.

Enna Kodumai Sir Idhu?

 

[amala]

Dear sister Renu,

You said:


Ask any endangered communities, be it Jews in America or the Parsis in India, they do not care about who their sons marry.

Regards,
KRS[/INDENT][/COLOR]

Dear Shri KRSJi,

If I may butt in please. The unfairness of it all (and yes i accept nature is cruel and unfair. call it karma or whatever) not withstanding at the end of the day it all boils down to individual preferences.

A community and scream, shout and yell until its blue (lol pun not intended) in the face, but people will still marry who they want and nothing can especially at this age stop them. I don't know if that is a good thing or bad thing. But personally i think the sooner a "community" stops bleating, the better. Because we can't change anything.

 

[prasad1]

Dear Amala,

I answer remains same.
So please excuse me.

Thank God, they are at least getting married!

 

[prasad1]

If you follow any Animal show or History channel, it is all about preserving your gene through your sibling. And majority is the male just plants the seed, and plays no part afterwards. So in a way it is conquest.

The female of the species accepted that in large part (except few exception Sea Horse). The same has been true in human species. The things are changing in societies where female is becoming independent.

Our thinking (we the parents) is still behind times, and will probably will never catch up to it.

 

[BostonSankara]

Dear KRS Ji,

This is not so for Jews in the US. While not opposed it is HIGHLY PREFERRED for Jews to marry Jews and is suggested by both the parents and the congregation. I think most groups are like that. On some level (and this is purely ridiculous but somehow true) I hope my kids marry smart scientists. Why? Well... because it's what I do!

But, all these prejudices aside, humanity is humanity. This is why your question and the answer to it are Universal. Ask any endangered communities, be it Jews in America or the Parsis in India, they do not care about who their sons marry.

Regards,
KRS[/INDENT][/COLOR]

 

[amala]

I hope my kids marry smart scientists. Why? Well... because it's what I do!

Show off!! sorry couldn't resist that one!...I'll just sneak away now...behind the sofa:behindsofa:

 

[Raghy]

Dear Chi.Ravi, Greetings.

I refer to your message in post #15. I am in conversation with few TB Iyengar girls. they are qualified like from MBA to school final.

The 7 points, all of the 7 points are not true in their cases. They like to marry Iyengar guys. No, they are not even considering any IC marriage situations.

My dear friend, all the Iyengar boys have to do is... just act like a man, approach any of these girls and say, " I like you. I like to know more about you. Can I buy you a cup of coffee, please?"... Ravi, Brahmin boys are not doing even that simple task.

They don't have to do this..... dheena super scene - YouTube

or this either ..... Remo - YouTube

They just want a simple, open, straight forward approach. Not very hard. It doesn't take too much to walk up to a girl and say " I like you. I want you".

When TB boys are ready to do that, they will score every time.

Cheers!

 

[C RAVI]

Dear Chi.Ravi, Greetings.


The 7 points, all of the 7 points are not true in their cases. They like to marry Iyengar guys. No, they are not even considering any IC marriage situations.

My dear friend, all the Iyengar boys have to do is... just act like a man, approach any of these girls and say, " I like you. I like to know more about you. Can I buy you a cup of coffee, please?"... Ravi, Brahmin boys are not doing even that simple task.

Shri Raghy,


Its not about Iyer or Iyengar guys. Its in general about Brahmin guys...

I have quoted your specific message above.

This is what I have mentioned in one of my 7 points - "TB girls don't find TB guys roaming around, romancing, attracting and pleasing them". This is to be understood that majority of TB guys are utterly lacking such approaching attitude. I have stated the same long before in this forum.


I have made 7 points based on what I could come to know clearly, very cleary, with maximum flow of information, news, updates, discussions with folks face to face here in Chennai etc...

You may be highly informative than me and so you could not accept all of my 7 points. May be you know much better and expressing here very honestly. So nice of you to put forward the ground reality and enlightning us. Thank you very much.

 

[BostonSankara]

To marry a beautiful Indian woman in the States you need to either be a doctor or a lawyer. The only other option way is if you can pull some serious Rajnikanth style moves to get her attention! :-D

 

[C RAVI]

Dear Renu,


Had it been a TB girl and as Ravi has clearly said Chennai/Tamil Nadu/India residing TB girl, no way jose can she come to this TB site and ask suggestions from us good members on how to impress/get her NB guy and his mum. No way. The good people here will pounce on her and tear her apart and blame her for the unmarried TB guys crisis.

So dear Renu. You see the problem is quite simple. For TB girls in India they cannot marry NB. Apparently too many are. But TB guys in India can marry anyone! Coz the situation is like this: Thank God, they are at least getting married!

One has to make a simple attempt to grasp the import of the message without any mental preoccupation. I am telling this just not to counter argue with Amala, but in general, as it is a public forum, and there should not be any misunderstandings, I am taking this effort to clear any confusions.

The list I have included is not entirely on the subject of tue LOVE of a TB girl with a NB guy, but specifically an opportunity (due NB guys pleasing around and B guys not doing so) and determined choice due one or the other reasons that I have listed in detail.

When some one as a NB girl OR TB girl, a NB guy OR a TB guy approaches this forum for tips and suggestions to win her/his "True Love" (the person and the GOD news if its true love or with calculated benefits), I bet majority of members would encourage them and would give tips and suggestion to impress their partner, patner's parents etc, just for the sake of "Love to Win" / "Lovers to Win" and live happily to their heart content.

Hardly we can find a few members (I can say just 1 member, whom we know well, who expresses his views and opinions very honestly in a straight forward manner, as a staunch brahmin against intercaste/inter religious marriage even if its out of pure love) who would disappoint them.

Members should understand that, we project the ground reality in our society, honestly to the best of our knowledge and certainly sympathise the folks at the receiving end. Whether those folks are guys or girls as the topic/issue in hand.

To the best of my knowledge, during my last more than 2 years of participation here, I honestly would like to say that, not a single person has expressed that TB guys in India can marry anyone and TB girls in India should not marry any one they like.

If any one of us have stated that TB guys can marry any one they like, out of cast/religion/national, we can not find members wasting their time and energy in expressing their concern, sympathazing TB guys and venting their disappointments.

It is the basic and in general that people living in India would be expecting in return from the same society they are living in, as the basic expectations of any community. When the counter part goes out of hand, certainly a set would be left stranded.


My above post is in the interst of the forum and forum members only. It has nothing to do with aruging with Amala and making her understand exclusively.

I was first thinking of not bothering to express my views on this. But, I did so, so that there should not be any sort of ill will among the members here. There should not be any false impression that members are gender biased.

Hope this clarifies.

If I am wrong in any ways above, I would request members to pardon me.

 

[amala]

I was telling renu the same thing. I realise the TB guys unmarried crisis in India well after having it drilled into my head by some here for the past 2 years and was conveying the same to renu. Thats all.

 

[Raghy]

Chi.Ravi, Greetings.

I refer to your post #35. I felt bad after reading your response. Your message showed, I have not delivered my message well.

Dear Ravi, kindly imagine... just to get a job, we plan so well... preparation of appilication; checking that application with someone more senior & more educated than us; Posting that application only in the auspicious post office; possible trip to Pillayar and /or Hanuman koil to pray for the success of the application....... to so many preparations before interview, before job acceptance, checking all the auspicious times before starting that job, donating the first month salary to the temple.... pooja to thank for the job; sometimes ' anga pradhadshinam'.... I did all that. I don't know about others. After 2 years I had no trouble resigining that job. So, even for such an employment we do somany preparations... how much preparations should the boys undertake to win the lady of our life? It is just one chance, one opportunity...

Do we prepare so much? I think we don't.

I did some preparation 31 years ago.... not a detailed preparation though..... a Boy should do his homework. should decide what he wants.. let the girl know he wants her by body languages... then approach. If failed, not to worry.... always adopt this policy..... Alwarpetai Aaluda song - Vasool Raja MBBS - YouTube

Sorry, Chi.Ravi, I could not accept any of the 7 points mentioned by yourself. Later on life, you may feel like myself. But for some reason, I was so very confident when I was young. When the boys have that kind of confidence, girls will just love them.

Cheers!

 

[amala]

TBH even I'm finding it hard to agree with those 7 points. Some may be right and some are hearsay but thats just a few people's experiences. Its highly generalised as well.

But if i say so I will be told I'm not from India/Chennai/TN. I don't know the "ground realities" because I'm not in ground zero .

Or told like what was told to Renu. As Malaysians we don't have the need to know. But I have a Periappa in Chennai. Lots of distant cousins. And they are pure Brahmins and this doesn't seem to be their experience.

 

[C RAVI]

Great enlightment from Shri Raghy and Amala. Thanks to you both..

 

[C RAVI]

As shri Raghy and Amala has enlightened here with their solid experiences, knowledge and good information in hand, I wish, in a real society outside this cyber world, some people enlighten those girls as well who are between the age group of 30 and 38 years and are still looking for a guy who is more educated then them and who are earning more than themselves (most of these girls are earning between 40K and 60K). As well those girls from capable families to spend for marriage/groom, for their daughters who are just qualified with BA/BCOM/BBA and alike (many not working as well), but want only professionally qualified guys like BE/BTech etc and earning atleast 8-10 Lakh a year.

 

[Govinda]

You guys seem to be masters of social sciences!

 

[tbs]

You guys seem to be masters of social sciences!

hi govinda,
more than social sciences....more psychologists.....masters in psychology....lol

 

[biswa]

Dear Shri KRSJi,

If I may butt in please. The unfairness of it all (and yes i accept nature is cruel and unfair. call it karma or whatever) not withstanding at the end of the day it all boils down to individual preferences.

A community and scream, shout and yell until its blue (lol pun not intended) in the face, but people will still marry who they want and nothing can especially at this age stop them. I don't know if that is a good thing or bad thing. But personally i think the sooner a "community" stops bleating, the better. Because we can't change anything.

Well said! Jab miya bibi raazi, to kya karega kaazi. People are deluding themselves if they think they can stop the trend.

 

[biswa]

If you follow any Animal show or History channel, it is all about preserving your gene through your sibling. And majority is the male just plants the seed, and plays no part afterwards. So in a way it is conquest.

The female of the species accepted that in large part (except few exception Sea Horse). The same has been true in human species. The things are changing in societies where female is becoming independent.

Our thinking (we the parents) is still behind times, and will probably will never catch up to it.

Mr. Prasad, I think you meant offspring and not sibling!

But otherwise you are right on the money. Females are often viewed as property or chattel (as I think Amala said). In the good old days, people would be worried about protecting their land, their cows and their women. Nobody would be thinking about protecting men. It is just about safeguarding one's reproductive rights, like one's right to food and shelter. Traditionally women in most cultures really didn't have reproductive rights. That is now changing, and hence this question.

BTW, this is also true of other mammals such as tigers, elephants, seals, and deer. The male of the species maintains a harem of females. The female is allowed to mate only with one individual but nobody questions who the male is mating with. Man, after all is also an animal!

 

[renuka]

Mr. Prasad, I think you meant offspring and sibling!

But otherwise you are right on the money. Females are often viewed as property or chattel (as I think Amala said). In the good old days, people would be worried about protecting their land, their cows and their women. Nobody would be thinking about protecting men. It is just about safeguarding one's reproductive rights, like one's right to food and shelter. Traditionally women in most cultures really didn't have reproductive rights. That is now changing, and hence this question.

BTW, this is also true of other mammals such as tigers, elephants, seals, and deer. The male of the species maintains a harem of females. The female is allowed to mate only with one individual but nobody questions who the male is mating with. Man, after all is also an animal!

Dear Biswa,

Thats why I like the dog..they are grateful, loving and have minds of their own.
Both male and female have freedom to do as they please.

Coming to that Biswa..I will tell you something funny..when my younger bro was small he used to be very disturbed with the fact that a Male Canine is called Dog and a Female Canine is called Bitch.

He used to say..the word Bitch sounds so rude and its also used as an abusive so he used to call our Female Canine as Mrs Dog.

 

[prasad1]

Mr. Prasad, I think you meant offspring and not sibling!

But otherwise you are right on the money. Females are often viewed as property or chattel (as I think Amala said). In the good old days, people would be worried about protecting their land, their cows and their women. Nobody would be thinking about protecting men. It is just about safeguarding one's reproductive rights, like one's right to food and shelter. Traditionally women in most cultures really didn't have reproductive rights. That is now changing, and hence this question.

BTW, this is also true of other mammals such as tigers, elephants, seals, and deer. The male of the species maintains a harem of females. The female is allowed to mate only with one individual but nobody questions who the male is mating with. Man, after all is also an animal!

Yup sorry progeny or offspring instead of sibling, my mistake thanks.

 

[sarang]

From the same natgeo/animal planet channels:

Some species do use offsprings and siblings for propagation. In one programme it was the pigs; lions are no exception. Perhaps they are also corrupted by the environment or by the free for all rationalists.

Yup sorry progeny or offspring instead of sibling, my mistake thanks.

 

[C RAVI]

From the same natgeo/animal planet channels:

Some species do use offsprings and siblings for propagation. In one programme it was the pigs; lions are no exception. Perhaps they are also corrupted by the environment or by the free for all rationalists.

Absolutely right, shri sarang.

Most of the animals don't see who is the offspring and who is sibling, they just indulge in pleasure game to satisfy their senses. I heared (i dunno how true is that), it's only horse that has some unique senses. They would not mate with their mother or father. So, for breeding purposes their eyes are tied with cloths or something and then made to mate.

Anyways, in general what I believe is, though sensual senses are for procreation, all the living creatures, very much including the humans are just benefited by this sensual feelings to procreate, but are more inclined towards the sexual acts for pleasure. More than the need of the offspirings all the living species are inclined to some how feed their sensual senses.

The same with humans too. That's how we find many humans indulging in sexual acts for the pleasure, much before their marriage.

The basic fact, IMO is that, sexual needs are just the needs to satisfy the feelings shooting from head to toe.. To satisfy some how depending on each individuals attitude/perceptions/self control etc..etc.. It just helps in procreation but that's not the prime motive of the humans to indulge in sex. It just depends on which individual wants the satisfaction by which ways and means. The same goes with the animals.

Humans when reaches to the limits of animal instinct tend to use offsprins / siblings / any other's kids to satisfy themselves. That's the irony.