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Teenage Love

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K

krish44

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In star vijai neeya naana of 1st feb interesting discussion between youngsters and seniors on the this subject [ not fully available on you tube yet]

it gave a nice peek into thinking of new generation on love marriages

what starts as a friendship and sharing of interest turns into a relationship wanting to

share a lifetime with another.

their view is it is just a desire to marry a person with shared personal and professional

likes and one aspect of their life. In case it does not work out , they could make a

career and go their different ways if it is good for both.

they would not mourn for their bonding not resulting in marriage

.

they would not attach too much sanctity to their love and would not behave like devdas

in the event of love failure and destroy themselves with drinks.lol
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krish44 said:
they would not mourn for their bonding not resulting in marriage

.

they would not attach too much sanctity to their love and would not behave like devdas
Click to expand...

Most females do not really mourn any break up..they quickly get an arranged marriage.

Its only guys who become Devdas.

A friend told me a joke:

If you marry your girlfriend.. that is Love Marriage,
If you marry another person's ex girlfriend..that is Arranged marriage!
 
most parents in the neeya naana program had strong disapproval of the mindset of teenagers

regarding love marriages. their basic thinking was that job of teenagers was to study in colleges and not be

distracted by love affairs.secondly, the feelings for each other without high degree of emotional

involvement and a matter of fact approach based on suitability , academic proficiency and career

matching between boys and girls practised by teenagers could hardly be called love by parents. the

casual approach to dating and break up was unacceptable to parents.
 
Infactuation vs. Love - old topic. At the young age, one does not have the necessary view to make himself or herself commit to one and understand responsibilities and paid. So better for everyone at that age on what they are supposed to do.. with proper foundation as education and growth focus.. they can soon find the right love.
 
What is the real meaning of dating? Is it just a casual friendship between male and female or beyond that?
 
krish44 said:
most parents in the neeya naana program had strong disapproval of the mindset of teenagers

regarding love marriages. their basic thinking was that job of teenagers was to study in colleges and not be

distracted by love affairs.secondly, the feelings for each other without high degree of emotional

involvement and a matter of fact approach based on suitability , academic proficiency and career

matching between boys and girls practised by teenagers could hardly be called love by parents. the

casual approach to dating and break up was unacceptable to parents.
Click to expand...

I feel teenage from 13-19 years is not the time to be in Lovvu cos it can be distracting.

I remember one of my school mates a Non Indian girl who fell in Lovvu with a fellow Non Indian classmate at the age of 16.

This girl was extremely intelligent and planned to be a lawyer but the guy was a total non studious types and told her not to become a lawyer and she agreed and did not go to University all for the sake to marry him.

They did get married no doubt..but I feel she wasted her "brains".

So this is the drawback of Teenage Lovvu...why just fall in love too young.

I feel if people want to date they should start dating once they are in college when they are more mature and know how to divide time between Lovvu and studies.

Also do not get too attached and keep options open..if studying in another country its even easier cos when the plane heads home the plane does not have the carry any excess baggage of a boyfriend or girlfriend..just say BYE BYE and fly back home!LOL
 
CHANDRU1849 said:
What is the real meaning of dating? Is it just a casual friendship between male and female or beyond that?
Click to expand...

Ok lets get real....Dating is friendship with romantic interest.

CoupleS who are NORMAL do not say its Deiviga Kadhal!LOL

Ok in dating there need not always be sexual activity.

Usually the romantic activity is divided into 4 Bases.

Base 1 to Base 4.

Only Base 4 involves Sexual intercourse.

Those who want to retain their virginity usually only stick to Base 1 which only involves light kissing and holding hands.
 
renuka said:
Usually the romantic activity is divided into 4 Bases.

Base 1 to Base 4.

Only Base 4 involves Sexual intercourse.

Those who want to retain their virginity usually only stick to Base 1 which only involves light kissing and holding hands.
Click to expand...

Do we have authenticated guidelines for dating? What are reflective of Base 2 and 3. Only Base 4 affects virginity and 1-3 are not.

It is like bank robbery is a crime; whereas pick pocketing is not.

If socialization is the order of the day, we will have to accept it.
 
Teenage love is like myopia..You cannot see the distant future..It is manifestation of infatuation ..

A Girl after her first crush would want to see Him all day..She glows on hearing about him..Her heart lub dub palpitation can be heard..There is perceptible sweating..She would like to bond emotionally

For a Boy his communication (lack of it) is the serious issue..He cannot express his love...Listening is his first casualty..He would like to bond physically

So teenage love is immature ...Do not get into the quagmire..You will regret it later!
 
krish44 said:
most parents in the neeya naana program had strong disapproval of the mindset of teenagers

regarding love marriages. their basic thinking was that job of teenagers was to study in colleges and not be

distracted by love affairs.secondly, the feelings for each other without high degree of emotional

involvement and a matter of fact approach based on suitability , academic proficiency and career

matching between boys and girls practised by teenagers could hardly be called love by parents. the

casual approach to dating and break up was unacceptable to parents.
Click to expand...
hi

truly.... i had teen age love in my life....it is good feelings and hope for future.....have u ever tried in ur life?.....teen age love

is ONCE IN LIFE TIME....its good or bad....but if we go through ..then realize the hardships...
 
renuka said:
Ok lets get real....Dating is friendship with romantic interest.

CoupleS who are NORMAL do not say its Deiviga Kadhal!LOL

Ok in dating there need not always be sexual activity.

Usually the romantic activity is divided into 4 Bases.

Base 1 to Base 4.

Only Base 4 involves Sexual intercourse.

Those who want to retain their virginity usually only stick to Base 1 which only involves light kissing and holding hands.
Click to expand...
hi renu,

what yaar.....light kissing/hard kissing?......both are kissing yarrr.....light kissing may be DEIVEEGA KAADHAL.....hard kissing

may be couples kaadhal...lol
 
CHANDRU1849 said:
Do we have authenticated guidelines for dating? What are reflective of Base 2 and 3. Only Base 4 affects virginity and 1-3 are not.

It is like bank robbery is a crime; whereas pick pocketing is not.

If socialization is the order of the day, we will have to accept it.
Click to expand...

Dear Chandru,

I can not go more detail than this...it would be too explicit.

It is available on Google searc..at the same time use your imagination.

From time to time its advisable to use the imagination ..it helps increase neuronal activity in the brain.

BTW there is no "crime" here..its just a game that humans play..if that game was a crime everyone would be in jail!LOL
 
tbs said:
hi renu,

what yaar.....light kissing/hard kissing?......both are kissing yarrr.....light kissing may be DEIVEEGA KAADHAL.....hard kissing

may be couples kaadhal...lol
Click to expand...


Dear TBS garu,

Deiviga Kadhal is the Kadhal where guys claim their hormones did not come into action and they worship their girlfriend like a "devi" and do not view her from a sexual point of view as they CLAIM!LOL

I feel its becos usually these type of guys are not machakarans and even to get one girl is a real big deal..so they are afraid to hold even the hands of the girl fearing the girl might misunderstand the intention and leave him and he knows his chances of getting another "Figure" is very low!

So this type of guys just suppress their emotions and feelings but hormones will be wrecking their mind and they will be fantasizing non stop but yet claim its Deiviga Lovvu.

Then if these types of guys get a chance to finally marry their Lovvu ....they wont be doing any Pooja for her but instead will be singing Pottu Thakku song!LOL
 
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renuka said:
Dear Chandru,

I can not go more detail than this...it would be too explicit.

It is available on Google searc..at the same time use your imagination.

From time to time its advisable to use the imagination ..it helps increase neuronal activity in the brain.

BTW there is no "crime" here..its just a game that humans play..if that game was a crime everyone would be in jail!LOL
Click to expand...

Madam,

If dating or romance is due to the activity of brain, then it requires acceptance, and moral policing has no role.

The reason for two forms of crime was brought as an example is when case 1 i.e. light kissing is acceptable and case 4 i.e. physical sex is not - shows contradiction. Light kissing ultimately leads to case 4, I believe.
 
Agree with Chandru !!

This is a dangerous path to slip & kids cannot control their emotions at this age !!. So now you all know why I place so much premium on conservative upbringing.

All these nonsense at this age will spoil the kids & ruin their careers/lives. Just because some kids were able to come out unscathed doesn’t mean this is okay. so the saying - "Ignorance is bliss" is another gem, our kids don't need to know everything at this age!!!!
 
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when teenagers reach the age when when they experience love in its purest sublime form, older generation parents

go with a mindset to find fault with them and indoctrinate them with their religeous/caste practises and under the

pretense of protecting them biases their attitudes towards the other sex damaging their lives.

the best the parents can do is offer them understanding regarding their desires for friendship and bonding with the

opposite gender. they can also teach them to court and date a person of other sex. they can teach them safe sex

and how to protect themselves. teenagers have to learn these things so that they can make informed decisions

regarding the mate they should bond with for life. marrying someone they know and bond with is far better than

arranged matches of these days
 
CHANDRU1849 said:
Light kissing ultimately leads to case 4, I believe.
Click to expand...

dear Chandru,

Not always true..Base 1 does not need to lead to Base 4. Its a well know fact that many college Lovers indulge in Base 1 and do not proceed beyond that cos they know that Base 4 is irreversible and might lead to an unwanted pregnancy. Base 1 is just kissing and nothing more..so technically one could have kissed 10 guys but remain a virgin on technical grounds.

But then again I have noted that those who seem "innocent" usually proceed to Base 4 too soon like we see in the movies..then they start crying begging the guy to marry them....so its always the simple innocent girls who fall prey easily..so if you ask me I wont recommend even Base 1 for an orthodox girl cos they are very easily misled.They fall in love too easily.

Non-orthodox homes girls are warned about consequences of a teenage romance..so the girls already know what are the dangers.Also non orthodox girls do not fall in love too easily and might think of a future in her career and life..so a college lovvu could just be a time pass.That is why its so easy for a female to ditch a boyfriend and marry a guy her parents chooses.

But in orthodox homes such risks of teenage lovvu are always almost not discussed becos of taboo and girls have no idea what danger lies ahead and fall in love with the 1st guy who show her affection.

So its not about being moral or immoral here..its about awareness of "danger" of being misled.

But I think youngsters girls these days are intelligent enough not to be misled..in fact guys might be misled by girls!LOL

Then again if both partners agree for a non committal relationship...then it becomes friends with benefits and not hold each other ransom and talk about marriage.
 
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renuka said:
dear Chandru,

Not always true..Base 1 does not need to lead to Base 4. Its a well know fact that many college Lovers indulge in Base 1 and do not proceed beyond that cos they know that Base 4 is irreversible and might lead to an unwanted pregnancy. Base 1 is just kissing and nothing more..so technically one could have kissed 10 guys but remain a virgin on technical grounds.
Click to expand...

Madam,

Law of Virginity is that Virginity is not lost if dating is restricted to only kissing even the number is more than one. This is due to the impact of Western culture.

Fine. Present day youngsters are blessed.
 
CHANDRU1849 said:
Madam,

Law of Virginity is that Virginity is not lost if dating is restricted to only kissing even the number is more than one. This is due to the impact of Western culture.

Fine. Present day youngsters are blessed.
Click to expand...

Nope...its not Western Culture alone.

The Kama Sutra describes 30 types of Kissing and there is no mention of marriage or restricting to only 1 partner.
 
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tbs said:
hi

truly.... i had teen age love in my life....it is good feelings and hope for future.....have u ever tried in ur life?.....teen age love

is ONCE IN LIFE TIME....its good or bad....but if we go through ..then realize the hardships...
Click to expand...

Only once? Come on TBSji, we know you are more experienced than that! :)
 
tbs said:
hi renu

you can do ph.d in kama sutra.....lah.......lol
Click to expand...


Dear TBS Garu,

When I landed in India at the age of 19 I bought 2 very important books:

1)Bhagavad Geeta with commentary by Adi Shankara

2)Kama Sutra.


I love to read anything!LOL
 
biswa said:
Only once? Come on TBSji, we know you are more experienced than that! :)
Click to expand...

hi sir,

teen age love ONLY ONCE..... its in high school...may be one sided lovvu..small meesai with vesthi.....hero style hair style....college

lovvu is matured....its 2 way lovvu....
 
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