ஆண் முதுமையில் இழக்க கூடாத சொத்து மனைவி &#2990

[P.J.]

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ஆண் முதுமையில் இழக்க கூடாத சொத்து மனைவி &#2990













ஒரு ஆண் முதுமையில்
இழக்க கூடாத சொத்து
மனைவி மட்டுமே......!!!



Source: Uma Maheshwaran

 

[Raji Ram]

OMG! What is wrong with you P J Sir?

Such a post on the start of Jaya varusham!

 

[P.J.]

Every old man's Sothu!! Never to Lose..!!

 

[krish44]

why oldmen alone?
no one would like to lose a companion at any time in life.
men find it more difficult to carry on without spouse in old age . ladies somehow cope better . they busy themselves with their next generations and pursue other interests .I know some widows feeling free after losing their spouses and living it up .Married ladies who have to support their
old half infirm husbands being jealous of them and feel stuck with their men. sounds a bit strange but it is a fact that many old men get ill treated by their wives also.

 

[P.J.]

Yes, Krish Sir, you are right, Men will be like fish out of water without their wife; somehow Widowed Women manage to live even after the husband's departure, but Men without wife in old age suffer more..

That is why in those days difference between girl and boy was kept minimum of more than 5 years.

 

[krish44]

Yes, Krish Sir, you are right, Men will be like fish out of water without their wife; somehow Widowed Women manage to live even after the husband's departure, but Men without wife in old age suffer more..

That is why in those days difference between girl and boy was kept minimum of more than 5 years.

are you suggesting that the age difference was kept to ensure men die first.? I thought it was kept as it was believed that girls mature faster than boys. It was perhaps also to ensure male superiority over females.of course there is a factor that life expectancy of male is more than female.so that they die almost together.

 

[tbs]

hi

i remember 2 stories in my life...my paternal grand father died at 96 yrs old ...he lived with his WIFEtill end of his death...he said once to

grand maa ....if i die (grand father)...i will call u back within one year...same thing happened...my grand mother died within one

yr my grand father's death....my maternal grand father had the same....my maternal grand mother died within one yr of grand father's

death...they both had ONLY SOTHU.....ONLY MANAIVI....

 

[renuka]

Dear PJ sir,

Actually men are the sentimental creatures with less confidence! LOL

In this world we have to be practical..I cant help pasting this here:


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[TD]When a tree sways with the wind, its branches bend and toss up and down. But the tiny bird sitting on it is not afraid? Why? Because the bird relies on its wings. Even if the branch falls down, as long as its wings are fine, it is safe. With this realization, the bird sits bravely on the swaying branch. However, human beings do not have so much faith as a tiny bird. Even with the slightest problems on the tree of life, people get very worried, why? It is because they have lost their self-confidence. Even at the slightest suffering, people are frustrated, depressed and unable to bear. Instead of depending on your intelligence, physical strength or wealth, trust your self-confidence. Do good deeds; let every step and all your efforts be directed to win His Grace and proximity. Then, you will surely triumph!

[SIZE=-1]- Divine Discourse, 'My Dear Students', Vol 3, Ch 3, Jun 30, 1996.[/SIZE]​

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[V.Balasubramani]

P.J.Sir,

I posted this poem of Avvaiyar in your other thread ‘பாசம், நேசம், அன்பு, அரவணைப்பு .......

In this poem while the first line speaks about the delicious food offered by the mother, the last line explains about the importance of wife.

தாயோடறுசுவைபோம்,தந்தையோடுகல்விபோம்
சேயோடுயாம்பெற்றசெல்வம்போம்- மாயவாழ்வு
உற்றாருடன்போம்,உடன்பிறப்பால்தோள்வலிபோம்
பொற்றாலியோடுஎவையும்போம்,
-ஔவைமூதாட்டி.
This same poem comes handy here too. When wife is alive, life goes on smoothly and hence most don’t find her significance in taking care of the family especially during times of crisis. When one’s wife is alive nobody dare to spare a thought of living without a wife and when this unfortunate happens, men find themselves like fish out of water, struggle to manage things. I have seen few friends of mine who recently lost their wives struggle hard to lead a normal life. There can be no substitute for a wife as she is known to take different avatars depending upon the situation.

They are known to perform ‘Shatkarma’ i.e. (1) Kaaryeshu dhasi, (2) Karaneshu Manthri, (3) Rupeshu Lakshmi, (4) Shamaya Tharithri (5) Snehe sa Maatha and (6) Sayaneshu Veshya. They are prone to run extra mile on their duties. Maintaining the home as a sweet home, immense love and affection towards family members, bringing up children, planning and execution, etc etc

In short, a ‘temporary separation’ will certainly prove the importance of a wife for a husband/family and when such a member is lost everything is lost. Life will become miserable and will be a boat without a oar/row.

There is yet another thread discussing on growing old. When age grows, energy slowly diminishes and we start using aids like specs, walking sticks, hearing aid, etc. But these things help us only to some extent to attend routine. But what about the timely expert advice………. of a minister ……..???

Morale: Preserve and protect wife who is highly precious!

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear P J Sir,

I did NOT want to discuss on the Tamil new year day and hence the silence yesterday! When Balu Sir posted a poem of

poetess Avvaiyaar in another thread, I wrote my contrary views. The last line was ' pottAliyodu evaiyum pOm'' which means

''everything will go with the golden thAli''. I don't agree to this point.

Normally, ladies are bolder than men! Hence it is said ''சக்தி இல்லையேல் சிவம் இல்லை (Shakthi illaiyEl Sivam illai) ! :high5:

 

[Raji Ram]

Oh! The same poem has been posted here too by Balu Sir! :typing:

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Balu Sir,

By 'potrAliyOdu evaiyum pOm', the poetess meant the lose of 'thAli' by a woman.

Those days widows were ill treated and hence the line!

If the poetess is alive now, she will rewrite as, ''manaiviyOdu evaiyum pOm''!

P.S: Men were allowed to get married any number of times and 'iLaiyAl' was very common in many families!

 

[renuka]

May be in those days men could not cope as well cos they seldom did any housework.

I have a friend who got divorced a couple of years back..he is doing perfectly fine.He is able to run his home totally on his own.

He takes advise from me and I told him to date a few woman but dont commit to anyone as yet and he is doing well with my advise...I told him only get married again when your kids are in college and make sure the woman you marry has no small kids to make you pay for her kids..so play safe and marry only when all kids from either side are on their own so that you dont have any financial burden cos after all what is you need is a companion and not the excess baggage that comes with it.

So men these days manage well and are not helpless as men of yesteryears.

 

[P.J.]

are you suggesting that the age difference was kept to ensure men die first.? I thought it was kept as it was believed that girls mature faster than boys. It was perhaps also to ensure male superiority over females.of course there is a factor that life expectancy of male is more than female.so that they die almost together.

Sri Krish Sir

I idea is was that women live longer than men; maturity comes with age.

 

[P.J.]

May be in those days men could not cope as well cos they seldom did any housework.

I have a friend also a doc who got divorced a couple of years back..he is doing perfectly fine.He is able to run his home totally on his own.

He takes advise from me and I told him to date a few woman but dont commit to anyone as yet and he is doing well with my advise...I told him only get married again when your kids are in college and make sure the woman you marry too has no small kids to make you pay for her kids..so play safe and marry only when all kids from either side are on their own so that you dont have any financial burden cos after all what is you need is a companion and not the excess baggage that comes with it.

So men these days manage well and are not helpless as men of yesteryears.

renukaji

may the cases you have seen are different; normally men crumble, suffer silently without their spouse in many cases.

Women without their husband are far better equipped to handle any situation.

 

[Raji Ram]

......... So men these days manage well and are not helpless as men of yesteryears.

Dear Renu,

I am talking about the tambram mAmAs who have been bossing their spouses all along their life! :lol:

 

[renuka]

renukaji

may the cases you have seen are different; normally men crumble, suffer silently without their spouse in many cases.

Women without their husband are far better equipped to handle any situation.

Dear PJ sir,

Some of my uncles are widowers and they are fine...they are practical and understand that life and death is not in our hands.

They too have loved their wives but they did not break down and are managing well in all aspects of live.

After the initial phase of grief reaction most people get on with life very well.


In fact I know an elderly person who lost his wife and son and still continues life happily..he left everything to God and goes around doing lots of Seva as before.

I feel its men who had not treated their wives well when their wives were alive are the ones who cant cope cos only in their wives absence they feel how much they took her for granted and they start to feel guilty and that guilt breaks them down but for the man who had treated his wife well and loved her..he lives in her fond memories and does not break down cos he has no guilt...and he can even move on and marry again.

 

[renuka]

Dear Renu,

I am talking about the tambram mAmAs who have been bossing their spouses all along their life! :lol:

Dear RR ji,

read my post #17!LOL

 

[Raji Ram]

.......... may the cases you have seen are different; normally men crumble, suffer silently without their spouse in many cases.

Women without their husband are far better equipped to handle any situation.

Oh, yes!! Many tambram mAmAs are inefficient in managing their house!

(I am NOT talking about smart men like Krish Sir!!)

One mAmi known to me gave a sigh of relief when her spouse left this world!

 

[Raji Ram]

..... I feel its men who had not treated their wives well when their wives were alive are the ones who cant cope cos only in their wives absence they feel how much they took her for granted and they start to feel guilty and that guilt breaks them down but for the man who had treated his wife well and loved her..he lives in her fond memories and does not break down cos he has no guilt...and he can even move on and marry again.

:clap2: Shall join after a break!!

 

[V.Balasubramani]

Dear Renu,

I am talking about the tambram mAmAs who have been bossing their spouses all along their life! :lol:

Mam,

You cannot generalise all tambaram Mamas.

 

[krish44]

Oh, yes!! Many tambram mAmAs are inefficient in managing their house!

(I am NOT talking about smart men like Krish Sir!!)

One mAmi known to me gave a sigh of relief when her spouse left this world!

hey RRji
what have I done? to deserve this smart label. I have throughout been a good boy.
only recently I decided to wake up to protest against all atrocities done by the women folks. I do not know how long my freedom of speech will last.I have my wifes permission to say I am a good husband.
I actually know an old TB mami who was talking of lack of freedom of movement because of a restrictive spouse and was jealous of her another relative a widow who was free and independant to do what she desired.mostly I talk from personal experience though somethings are shocking to say the least.

 

[renuka]

I actually know an old TB mami who was talking of lack of freedom of movement because of a restrictive spouse and was jealous of her another relative a widow who was free and independant to do what she desired.mostly I talk from personal experience though somethings are shocking to say the least.

A spouse does not have to be dead for one to feel freedom.

If two people really cant stand each other its better to opt for a divorce and wish each other well instead of being envious of someone who has freedom due to a dead spouse!LOL

 

[krish44]

May be in those days men could not cope as well cos they seldom did any housework.

I have a friend who got divorced a couple of years back..he is doing perfectly fine.He is able to run his home totally on his own.

He takes advise from me and I told him to date a few woman but dont commit to anyone as yet and he is doing well with my advise...I told him only get married again when your kids are in college and make sure the woman you marry has no small kids to make you pay for her kids..so play safe and marry only when all kids from either side are on their own so that you dont have any financial burden cos after all what is you need is a companion and not the excess baggage that comes with it.

So men these days manage well and are not helpless as men of yesteryears.

renukaji
you are a menace with your unconventional views.all TB ladies will chase you away from this forum.All TB men are patnivrata and do not let go of their wives. suggesting divorce or even talking about happiness after the same - though may be a fact in most cases- is considered unacceptable. it is kallanum manaivi,pullanum manaivi .
normal boys are not getting girls to date that easily . pl do not tell divorced man also to join the race. He has already got one chance. He should leave the field and give a chance to youngsters in the family
I agree with you that once his kids are married ,and settled ,he could play his second innings with some old hag without baggage who might put up with him

 

[V.Balasubramani]

Dear Balu Sir,

By 'potrAliyOdu evaiyum pOm', the poetess meant the lose of 'thAli' by a woman.

Mam,

Thanks. I stand corrected.