What a sad compromise!!. If humans only wanted jobs &money, there would have been NO need for religion, culture, traditions..
Like how we need food for the body, we need religion,philosophy, culture & traditions for our Soul. what purpose is served by teaching Kids onlyto go find a Job ? They should we well rounded with an excellent knowledge ofour philosophy, scriptures etc…
Clearly all those who moved out of TN & South ingeneral have lost the most precious in the process & the impact is farhigher on the Kids since they have completely lost touch with our richtraditions.
And why would people feel the need to come to this site& spend time?. Imagine if the 1[SUP]st[/SUP] generation is feeling so much déjàvu, what will be the impact on the Kids who are neither here nor there. theywill NOT be accepted by the Whites in all eternity, so they will be secondclass for ever. They will be blaming their parents all their lives.
This is where I have the utmost admiration to the Malayalis& similarly to the NB Tamils & Kannadigas who went in droves to middleeast/other countries seeking work, everyone of them comes back & buys ahome here & they relocate back without fail after their work career isover. They go abroad, make money & come back to settle here!!
To the PIOS – I am NOT trying to put you all down here. Allthe other people on this forum should understand what is the long term impact ofmoving away from our home town & settling abroad. They will then realize& not NOT push their kids to go abroad, instead seek jobs here in TN. Every life experience is a learning for others& that’s how we improve as a community.
dear jaykay,
i do understand and appreciate your anguish. i felt the need to answer you (& those whose views are similar) but at the same time, did not know whether i could ever relate to my own personal circumstances and state of mind, to the parameters that appear so high in your list ie community, hometown, culture etc.
for someone, whose family has moved to a different place every generation, we really do not have a strong tie to a piece of earth, to call us back and settle down. the place where i live, i should be at peace. and since i bring forth children to this world, the place should cater to their mental and intellectual growth without warping them from traditions, which i myself do not believe in, and what i consider an albatross.
i would like to point out, that the new societies of the world, much as they have bloody antecedents, are a melting pot of humanities. the key to an open mind, is, as i have said, is to accept that your children can marry whom they want. i can tell my children the same in india, but an india still deeply imbedded in the caste system, will give them a rough life. especially the males, and it will take a few generations before the curse of caste vanishes from india. that is my sincere prayer.
caste, i find, is like a shirt, that is unique to india. it vanishes out of each indian, the minute he leaves the shores, and lands, particularly in the west. it is an exhilarating feeling, to be devoid of this sack cloth, i think. add to it, the shackle like traditions, which prevent individuality and independence, all in the name of community and propriety, is something, for folks like me, too much to handle.
most people who emigrate to the americas or australias, do not live all that different from india, per se. except they live on their own terms. most tambrams do poonal for their sons, out of consideration for their folks in india. so they come to india, do the poonal, and it disappears the kid gets on the plane. ask him for his abhivadhey and you will know what i mean.
i think these are but inevitable changes, brought by technology and globalization. that a scavenger's son could dream today of being an engineer, and a maid's daughter could be a doctor, is the wonderful change that is taking place in india. which gives me great gratification. but all this means, entrenched establishment types like our community, needs to change in attitudes. change fast, or as it happpend in tamil nadu since 1967, they will be changed for you. by the erstwhile disenfranchised or by the sheer rule of numbers.
whichever it is, the smart thing, is for us, to seek opportunities in places where our fathers did not venture to tread. it does not mean, others have not been there before. people movement has been the norm ever since the dawn of mankind. we tambrams did not grow in tamil nadu. we came here maybe a couple of thousand years ago. but from somewhere. to pack up the bags, and leave for what we presume to be better climate, is not a sin. it is just another facet of human behaviour.
a movement of some folks, is not a disaster for the community left behind. it will deal with changes in its own way. and for those who move, there is no loss either. they will find what they want, at the place they move. or they will keep on moving. such is life.
re your point about not being accepted in a western society is just a point. can we truly say that we are accepted as equals, by the rest of tamil community? i am not talking about some seat in a college or government job. i mean, the concept of being considered a part of the society and treated by the nadars gounders mudaliars naidus chettiars as one among them tamil?
or when they call us saami or iyeray, there is a invisible curtain, that separates us and them. B and NB? if this be so, i think it is so, i feel, that the generation of the 20th tambrams leaders like rajaji or va ve su iyer etc did great disservice to this generation..for are we not paying the price for their arrogance or sheer inability to grasp the consequences of separation? i feel one doesn't need respect as much as one needs acceptance, and by deliberation or ignorance, the tambrams have moved away from the core of tamildom. this again, maybe a figment of my sensitivity or imagination. that much i will concede.
the western society, atleast where i live, is far more accommodating of a new comer; than the indian society of a dalit with whom it has shared the landspace for thousands of years. the latter part bothers me. i do not want my children to be a part of this discrimination. this heritage. no amount of compensation, quotas or even apologies can wipe away the dirt instilled by manu's system, of which we are at the top of the totem pole. this is what i think.
thank you.