Educated moms have fewer kids, reveals Census

[Janaki Jambunathan]

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If it can happen in life it could be excellent..

Most mothers of working daughters /DILs get drawn into daughters/DILs life at child birth for a few months whether they like it or not.

They are forced to play a support role[ It is an emotional hook]

It would be wonderful if parents/parents in law can stay away . It is a dream for most.

Somehow one cannot wish away and live ones own life when children call for help.

Also there is economics to consider. How many of us can live independantly after retirement? Health is a another issue which make parents stick to children after they

are married

Hope to be back in Madurai this week end and. Will respond to this (emotional) hook

 

[vgane]

with regards may i say it is applicable only to the parents of girl child. they have to spend a major chunk for education and marriage. it does not end there, the mapillai has to be pampered for all festivals for one year.( may be later too).they have to bear the expenses for first child!!?etc., whereas the boy's parents get everything from the girls side. so your argument holds good only for girl';s parents. but many of them are manasthans, so they never desire returns from their girl,except for Love.

For employed girls the tide is in their favor..Most of them call their parents to stay with them...Also they help their parents too financially...This is more in vogue..If the girl is not employed then she is financially dependent on husband..But this is not widely prevalent

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Ganesh,

Earning or not, girls have the upper hand. Let me share what I have observed about modern girls.

1. One newly wedded girl made her hubby buy a diamond ring for her father on his 60th birthday.

2. Many girls make the hubby buy the tickets for their parents to fly to the U S of A, because they come for 'baby sitting';

the hubby's parents buy their own tickets because they come to 'enjoy' the company of the grand children. Good logic!!
3. A non brahm software eng. girl married an Iyengar guy; sent all her earnings to her family in Andhra, for six years. opcorn:

It was one of the conditions, well before their love marriage. Then she coolly quit him and went away with another guy

from her own community. Probably guys from her own community might NOT have agreed for her condition!

 

[vgane]

A non brahm software eng. girl married an Iyengar guy; sent all her earnings to her family in Andhra, for six years. opcorn:

It was one of the conditions, well before their love marriage. Then she coolly quit him and went away with another guy

from her own community. Probably guys from her own community might NOT have agreed for her condition!

TB's are ilichavayans...A similar situation arose for an Iyer girl...She ran away with a NB...After getting a child the man discarded her & married some one from his own community (Gounder) and asked her to help the second wife...The girl is ruing her decision now!!

 

[tbs]

TB's are ilichavayans...A similar situation arose for an Iyer girl...She ran away with a NB...After getting a child the man discarded her & married some one from his own community (Gounder) and asked her to help the second wife...The girl is ruing her decision now!!

hi

this is going to happen more...still they hate TB BOYS.....

 

[navy-eswaran]

Eswaran ji is yet to know the real position of tambrahm guy's parents.
To be frank, I am happy that Ram and I are financially independent. eace:

madam,
the modern generation of parents (like us) have planned for their post retirement needs. still there are gullible ones and vultures within the family try to snatch from them, misplaced investments in nidhi companies has wiped out many homes in 90's. a little caution and medical insurance would go a long way in reducing dependency.many people do not know that for a few thousand rs per year PSU banks give medical insurance (cash less). awareness is so low.
hope elderly people opt for such schemes immediately.
finally drop the ji please.
regards

 

[yesmohan]

I could not understand the rationale and wisdom behind the preaching for…..oldies stay alone and lead their life with financial independence.

What is wrong in staying with son / DIL ….….or Daughter / SIL ?.

Lack of prudence to live in harmony with kith and kin, exposes the complex / lack of self confidence of the oldies in adjusting with others / situation.

Why looking after grand child is construed as baby sitting?.

Some of the Grand mothers/ fathers are looking after the grand children…….not because of their financial dependence but for the fact that they have the mental maturity and taking it as an opportunity gifted by God for nurturing the grand child / playing with them / enjoy them doing some mischief.

All rest with ......the line of thinking of the individuals.

 

[renuka]

I could not understand the rationale and wisdom behind the preaching for…..oldies stay alone and lead their life with financial independence.

What is wrong in staying with son / DIL ….….or Daughter / SIL ?.

Lack of prudence to live in harmony with kith and kin, exposes the complex / lack of self confidence of the oldies in adjusting with others / situation.

Why looking after grand child is construed as baby sitting?.

Some of the Grand mothers/ fathers are looking after the grand children…….not because of their financial dependence but for the fact that they have the mental maturity and taking it as an opportunity gifted by God for nurturing the grand child / playing with them / enjoy them doing some mischief.

All rest with ......the line of thinking of the individuals.

As we grow older we find adjusting to new changes and new individuals not as easy.

I like children but as I am aging I find it hard to stand too much sound by children playing or crying.

My neighbour has 11 grandchildren and at least 5 are there at one time...at times I wish I could sound proof my house.

So peace and quiet is not there when there are children around.

Some of us as we age crave peace and quiet.

When I was a teen I stayed in a house that was on a hill surrounded by a dense jungle.

Even the monkeys there did not make as much noise as my neighbours grandchildren!

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Renu,

The hero of the movie Jurassic park says that he doesn't like children because they are noisy and expensive!

But finally he starts loving the kids!

When we visited Ram's nephew, his daughter was very happy because Ram allowed her to play with her friends in the bed room

while he was taking a nap; she told me that her grandfather never allowed them in the bedroom when he took a nap!

 

[tbs]

As we grow older we find adjusting to new changes and new individuals not as easy.

I like children but as I am aging I find it hard to stand too much sound by children playing or crying.

My neighbour has 11 grandchildren and at least 5 are there at one time...at times I wish I could sound proof my house.

So peace and quiet is not there when there are children around.

Some of us as we age crave peace and quiet.



Even the monkeys there did not make as much noise as my neighbours grandchildren!

hi renu,

you are FIT FOR VAANAPRASTHA ASHRAMA....

 

[navy-eswaran]

hi renu,

you are FIT FOR VAANAPRASTHA ASHRAMA....

hi,
living with children is no problem for all. it is the total dependence(other word for control in TB household) on son that irks and leads to heartburn. many oldies(your word) micro manage instead of letting youngsters lead a normal life as per choice. the control starts with dress/expenditure/movies/travel and finally food and theetu madi pattu etc.,. a girl educated in a coed college would find all this obnoxious and the rift begins.
best is -garuda sowkiyama.
regards