Happily divorced

[renuka]

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Divorces may not be cheap, but sometimes an extra-marital fling has no price. A lot of divorces in the west start with that. Most people don't think how much it will cost them when they are just thinking about jumping into bed with somebody else. In these circumstances the reptilian brain often wins.

These people do not know how to cover up their tracks!!

I know of a case of a doctor who left his nurse wife for another doctor.

But this nurse also was too dominating and demanding types.
She used to work with me and non stop she would tell me that she only wears YSL lipstick and only uses perfumes brand that Princess Diana uses.!!LOL

I used to think that this nurse who was only some 4 feet 7 inches tall(real short ok),plump and not attractive..it certainly made no difference whether it was YSL or Chanel whatever she wore.

And she would keep bragging non stop how she demands diamonds from her rich doctor husband.
She said that she would get mad with her husband if he did not buy it for her and he would agree to anything she said.

I used to think to myself..one fine day her husband is going to kick her out of the house!!

One fine day her husband told her he wants to divorce her cos he can't stand her demands of jewels,branded make up etc and told her he had found a new woman to marry.

He fell in love with another female doc who was also a successful doctor like him in the hospital he worked.

The nurse was devastated..she said she didn't expect her ever obliging husband who gave in to every desire of hers to just ask her to leave.

So basically we can not take anyone for granted!

 

[renuka]

Interesting. This sounds similar to the familiar urban American greeting: "Wassup, dawg?"

Sometimes I wonder whether evolution always proceeds in the forward direction.

But it sound better in Tamil..Wassup Nai?


Nai(dog in Tamil)

But these days I use Sanskrit..it goes "Hey Shunaka! Katham Asti Bhavan/Bhavati?

Meaning :Hey Dog..How are you?

 

[biswa]

Agreed. There are definitely cases where one of the other party is really bad and divorce may be the only way out. However divorce cannot be a casual solution in general.

There are some other cases that I don't understand. Take the marriage of Charles and Diana for example. He always liked somebody else? They why marry Diana? She kept having one affair after another? Why do that and not get out earlier? It is almost as if they got married just so that they could eventually divorce.

 

[renuka]

Wanted to address this to both Renukaji and Raghyji who had similar responses. Do you think the divorced parents care so much about their kid? They are probably thinking more about their own happiness. Probably they would like to sever all ties to their past life and start over, if they could.

Dear Biswa,

Now you are starting to sound like the rest of them in forum!!LOL

You know no one wants to go through a divorce for nothing at all.

Some cases of divorce I have seen are:

1)Abusive husband

2)HIV positive husband that passes HIV to his innocent wife!

3)Husbands that sexually abuse their own daughters.

4)Spouses that convert to other religions and expect their spouses to follow suit.
I know one relative of my husband who divorced his wife who converted to Christianity.
He just could not accept a non hindu as his wife anymore!
Things change yaar..even I would divorce a spouse who changes his religion!

5)Abusive inlaws who ill treat their DILs .

List can go on and on and on.


Divorce parents try the best to move on with life making their kids the first priority.

 

[biswa]

But these days I use Sanskrit..it goes "Hey Shunaka! Katham Asti Bhavan/Bhavati?

Ha ha, nice! Even the Latin sounds good. Something like: "Canis, quo vadis?"

 

[biswa]

Dear Biswa,
Now you are starting to sound like the rest of them in forum!!LOL

I HOPE NOT, LOL!

You know no one wants to go through a divorce for nothing at all.

Some cases of divorce I have seen are:

1)Abusive husband

2)HIV positive husband that passes HIV to his innocent wife!

3)Husbands that sexually abuse their own daughters.

4)Spouses that convert to other religions and expect their spouses to follow suit.
I know one relative of my husband who divorced his wife who converted to Christianity.
He just could not accept a non hindu as his wife anymore!
Things change yaar..even I would divorce a spouse who changes his religion!

5)Abusive inlaws who ill treat their DILs .

List can go on and on and on.


Divorce parents try the best to move on with life making their kids the first priority.

All agreed and definitely can be justified as grounds for divorce. But I do note that you have not mentioned extra-marital affairs.

 

[renuka]

Agreed. There are definitely cases where one of the other party is really bad and divorce may be the only way out. However divorce cannot be a casual solution in general.

There are some other cases that I don't understand. Take the marriage of Charles and Diana for example. He always liked somebody else? They why marry Diana? She kept having one affair after another? Why do that and not get out earlier? It is almost as if they got married just so that they could eventually divorce.

Hey Biswa,

Don't you get it!!

Charles had to marry a royalty and Diana was the safest bet cos he must have thought that he just gets a wife for home sake and have fun(Chinna Veedu) outside(Sounds Typical Indian male like isn't it?)

Diana could not do anything with the bunch of ugly royals that surrounded her.
The stiff upper lip English types.

So what else you expect her to do?
She needed love and attention too hence all the affairs.

But at least she died a happy woman..died when she was in love with Al Fayed.

Hey Biswa..what has gotten into you?

You do not sound like yourself?

Got bitten by the conservative bug!! ha ha ha

 

[renuka]

I HOPE NOT, LOL!





All agreed and definitely can be justified as grounds for divorce. But I do note that you have not mentioned extra-marital affairs.

I left that out cos I recently read a survey that mentioned that extra marital affairs are not a leading cause for divorce.

Many spouses are able to forgive each other but leading cause of divorce is lack of emotional attachment and breakdown in communication.

 

[biswa]

Hey Biswa..what has gotten into you?

You do not sound like yourself?

Got bitten by the conservative bug!! ha ha ha

Hmm, somebody has to tow the official line in the absence of the doyens of the forum isn't it?

But I am surprised you or anybody else has not proposed an alternative lifestyle solution to the problem. That is: living in a free love commune such as that sponsored by Bhagwan Osho. Everybody sleeps with everyone else. Nobody has a permanent claim on another, hence everybody is kept on their toes. There is no marriage, hence no divorce.

The children are also community property, nobody cares who their exact father is. Everybody babysits and educates everybody else's kids. Everybody produces according to their ability, each consumes according to their own need. All's fair in love and communism?

 

[biswa]

But at least she died a happy woman..died when she was in love with Al Fayed.

Hmm, are you sure Diana was in love with Dodi and not the wealth of Mohammad al Fayed? She didn't fall in love with a driver did she?

Similarly are you sure Dodi was in love with Diana and not infatuated by her beauty? Would he have fallen for somebody not so pretty, but like Camilla? That way I think Charles is much more of a lover than Diana was.

Somehow my cynical mind thinks that Diana-Dodi was just having an opportunistic fling. Bollywood starlets and heroines do this all the time. They marry the richest industrialist they can rope in.

 

[renuka]

Hmm, are you sure Diana was in love with Dodi and not the wealth of Mohammad al Fayed? She didn't fall in love with a driver did she?

Similarly are you sure Dodi was in love with Diana and not infatuated by her beauty? Would he have fallen for somebody not so pretty, but like Camilla? That way I think Charles is much more of a lover than Diana was.

Somehow my cynical mind thinks that Diana-Dodi was just having an opportunistic fling. Bollywood starlets and heroines do this all the time. They marry the richest industrialist they can rope in.

Diana was a royal in her own right too.
So Dodi was a good match for her.

Charles and Camilia are both not good looking so they have Porthum in looks!!

BTW didn't you read the hot news phone conversation of Charles and Camilia..where he said he wanted to be her tampon?
And he was raving about Camilia unfailing skills?
Ha Ha Ha...so you know now what really mattered to Charles!!

And one more proof of Purva Janma love.

You see Charles great grand father(Edward VII) gave up the throne for the great grand mother of Camilia(Alice Keppel) who was his Chinna Veedu.

So may be they are both born again in this life too to meet!!LOL

 

[renuka]

Hmm, somebody has to tow the official line in the absence of the doyens of the forum isn't it?

But I am surprised you or anybody else has not proposed an alternative lifestyle solution to the problem. That is: living in a free love commune such as that sponsored by Bhagwan Osho. Everybody sleeps with everyone else. Nobody has a permanent claim on another, hence everybody is kept on their toes. There is no marriage, hence no divorce.

The children are also community property, nobody cares who their exact father is. Everybody babysits and educates everybody else's kids. Everybody produces according to their ability, each consumes according to their own need. All's fair in love and communism?

LOL!!

" अयं बन्धुरयं नेति गणना लघुचेतसां उदारचरितानां तु वसुधैव कुटुम्बकं ”

ayam bandhurayam neti ganana laghuchetasam udaracharitanam tu vasudhaiva kutumbakam

Only small men discriminate saying: One is a relative; the other is a stranger. For those who live magnanimously the entire world constitutes but a family.

 

[suraju06]

BTW didn't you read the hot news phone conversation of Charles and Camilia..where he said he wanted to be her tampon?
And he was raving about Camilia unfailing skills?
Ha Ha Ha...so you know now what really mattered to Charles!!

LOL. A man may say he wants to be the tampon or the lip-stick of his lady love(chinna veedu) when he is in a hormone induced stupor. But still he needs a wife to shout from the kitchen that he has to have his daily morning shave and it is getting late because he is absorbed in the Times of India reading about some stupid statistics about how every day sex helps you live without hypertension. A wife is a wife and a chinna veedu is just that, a chinnaveedu. European standards are quite different. For shouting from the kitchen like that the husband may ask for a divorce citing nagging and harassment as the reason.

Cheers

 

[renuka]

LOL. A man may say he wants to be the tampon or the lip-stick of his lady love(chinna veedu) when he is in a hormone induced stupor. But still he needs a wife to shout from the kitchen that he has to have his shave and it is getting late because he is absorbed in the Times of India reading about some stupid statistics about how every day sex helps you live without hypertension. A wife is a wife and a chinna veedu is just that, a chinnaveedu. European standards are quite different. For shouting from the kitchen like that the husband may ask for a divorce citing nagging and harassment as the reason.

Cheers

Do wives really shout from the kitchen?
I never do that..sometimes when my husband is not within audible range..I call his handphone.
I always carry my handphone with me wherever I am.

So when I call him..he comes to answer his phone and I tell him "Dinner is ready..come and take it from the kitchen"

We have to be polite wives...do not shout just use handphone!!

 

[sarang]

I was once a tenant in a chettiar's house. There was no visible tension when the second wife and her children visited, two or three times a week, as they stayed in a different house.

Having a second wife is more prevalent among chettiars, sindhis and perhaps in other business communities, as the men spend more time away from home. Among my relatives I can count only three cases in which the relationship was open.

Umm, I think plenty of Indians and Hindus have experimented with multiple wives (legally) in the past. It is only after the advent of the current secular Raj that the practice of polygamy has been outlawed (at least among Hindus). Not sure if the polygamists of the past were happier though ...

 

[sarang]

We had such communes in the past ; tantrics!

We tolerated all aberrations(!) when they were not a threat to conservative society and can be capsuled as a separate group. Even sects practising orgies or human sacrifice were contained but not wiped out.

Hmm, somebody has to tow the official line in the absence of the doyens of the forum isn't it?

But I am surprised you or anybody else has not proposed an alternative lifestyle solution to the problem. That is: living in a free love commune such as that sponsored by Bhagwan Osho. Everybody sleeps with everyone else. Nobody has a permanent claim on another, hence everybody is kept on their toes. There is no marriage, hence no divorce.

The children are also community property, nobody cares who their exact father is. Everybody babysits and educates everybody else's kids. Everybody produces according to their ability, each consumes according to their own need. All's fair in love and communism?

 

[renuka]

Having a second wife is more prevalent among chettiars, sindhis and perhaps in other business communities, as the men spend more time away from home. .

So they set up a new home wherever they go??
Like sailors??LOL

 

[guruvayurappan]

Ha Ha Ha...but at least it is better than a husband and wife who are happily married, never divorced and sitting in front of the house and watching their children play and the husband says:

"darling..look at both our sons playing with each other"

wife thinks in her mind "yes darling...both are my sons..don't ask me who is yours"

So guys unless there is a DNA test..men can only assume the kids are his!!LOL

dear renukaji !
one more joke like that
he said to his friend that he will not marry a telephone operator cos she may say 3 mins over
the friend said "that will be better answer than telling -sorry the line is busy and try after some time "
this is when manual exchange were in operation.. in mobile technology you will get announcement as the person you want to contact is out of reach /or not in a position to take your call