How common is IC marriages among TB community in Delhi?

[a-TB]

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Sir, British people who ruled us also human beings, would you like to invite them back?, I don't get the boomer mentality at all, they are conservative towards daughters and sons as well and then act all righuteous when daughters try to escape the conservative situation they have created.

Lol it seems people are doing female infanticide coz of superstitious belief, I would say it's the TB boomers who are mostly superstitious, those guys at least are clear about what they are doing, I'm sorry I'm not taking shit from whatsapp university members who pretend to understand the problems and attack others for being ignorant if they don't subscribe to the WhatsApp university findings.

Please leave my thread if you have nothing logical to contribute.

Pal
You are not sounding bright. Anyone that blabbers an opening post is not an owner of the thread. Please read forum rules before you blabber more

I actually sympathize the likes of you. Your pattern of engagement reveals an extraordinary frustration in life being forced into a life of celebacy. No statistics can fix this. There are literally billion women eligible to marry at this point. But you are unlikely to be selected because of your attitude of dehumanizing people with ignorant labels.

Boomers label apply somewhat to a generation primarily in the west and that too in America. Most here engaging in this thread are not born in USA. After Second World War there was a population boom but a particular attitude of that generation was labeled so. A little thinking will show you that boomer characterization will not apply to the Japanese. That is an example.

If you want to be presentable to the opposite sex you have to come across as thoughtful. Look at the post of Mr XLR8R. It is all thoughtful information. One would consider recommending such a person to a prospective match

But you dear Super are not showing up well. Calling jaats and punjabis some names will not get you **id.

Wake up. Even the other castes and women you disparage will not take people like you in their life.

I know life sucks. And seems there is no way to find a partner. All these complaining about statistics only makes you less desirable to prospects. The first rule of human. Relations. Is not to complain , criticize and condemn and generalize.

The English had terrible people and there were extraordinary human beings also. This is found in every human groupings. Saying they are humans does not mean that one should become their slaves. That kind of logic has a name. Dumb ass logic

I don’t know anything about you and my post is not to insult you for I have no idea who you are. But I am using the profile based on what is written thus far to make a point. That is blaming statistics etc cannot win. World is immense.

Bring a frog in the well cannot help. Even in recession smart people find jobs and create opportunities. Same is the case in finding brides or grooms. The stats being the way it is , is but one problem. How you show up makes all the difference. Take the advise or leave it.

Wish you the best regardless

 

[Super1223]

Pal
You are not sounding bright. Anyone that blabbers an opening post is not an owner of the thread. Please read forum rules before you blabber more

I actually sympathize the likes of you. Your pattern of engagement reveals an extraordinary frustration in life being forced into a life of celebacy. No statistics can fix this. There are literally billion women eligible to marry at this point. But you are unlikely to be selected because of your attitude of dehumanizing people with ignorant labels.

Boomers label apply somewhat to a generation primarily in the west and that too in America. Most here engaging in this thread are not born in USA. After Second World War there was a population boom but a particular attitude of that generation was labeled so. A little thinking will show you that boomer characterization will not apply to the Japanese. That is an example.

If you want to be presentable to the opposite sex you have to come across as thoughtful. Look at the post of Mr XLR8R. It is all thoughtful information. One would consider recommending such a person to a prospective match

But you dear Super are not showing up well. Calling jaats and punjabis some names will not get you **id.

Wake up. Even the other castes and women you disparage will not take people like you in their life.

I know life sucks. And seems there is no way to find a partner. All these complaining about statistics only makes you less desirable to prospects. The first rule of human. Relations. Is not to complain , criticize and condemn and generalize.

The English had terrible people and there were extraordinary human beings also. This is found in every human groupings. Saying they are humans does not mean that one should become their slaves. That kind of logic has a name. Dumb ass logic

I don’t know anything about you and my post is not to insult you for I have no idea who you are. But I am using the profile based on what is written thus far to make a point. That is blaming statistics etc cannot win. World is immense.

Bring a frog in the well cannot help. Even in recession smart people find jobs and create opportunities. Same is the case in finding brides or grooms. The stats being the way it is , is but one problem. How you show up makes all the difference. Take the advise or leave it.

Wish you the best regardless

Ah expected response from a boomer, can't understand statistics, won't understand the reality of the world, will name call and rant coz you can't come up with anything rational, I told you to leave if you can't contribute anything rational, don't you have a brain or can't you read? Lol, why am I even expecting rational stuff from boomers Is beyond me,
Mr boomer your trying to be righteous when everyone else is trying to be ruthless and crooked do you realize that? Yes we should not be frog in the well and learn to be crooked and ruthless as well, which I have learnt to be but unfortunately the boomer like you won't, you won't leave this thread also.
Don't know why you're defending Jaats and Punjabis so much, your daughter ran away with one?, they are crooked and we are not, you want people to be not frogs in the well, learnt to be crooked and more ruthless than them.
I'm not worried about me, I'm unfortunately worried about the lives of sons and daughters ruined due to such boomer mentality.
It's amusing that for supposedly an intelligent community I only get rants and righteous rhetoric, amusing thing is I get the same reaction from bengalis lol, they are also into this wokism stuff, it's going to be bad for sure if people don't grow and adapt

 

[renuka]

Ah expected response from a boomer, can't understand statistics, won't understand the reality of the world, will name call and rant coz you can't come up with anything rational, I told you to leave if you can't contribute anything rational, don't you have a brain or can't you read? Lol, why am I even expecting rational stuff from boomers Is beyond me,
Mr boomer your trying to be righteous when everyone else is trying to be ruthless and crooked do you realize that? Yes we should not be frog in the well and learn to be crooked and ruthless as well, which I have learnt to be but unfortunately the boomer like you won't, you won't leave this thread also.
Don't know why you're defending Jaats and Punjabis so much, your daughter ran away with one?, they are crooked and we are not, you want people to be not frogs in the well, learnt to be crooked and more ruthless than them.
I'm not worried about me, I'm unfortunately worried about the lives of sons and daughters ruined due to such boomer mentality.
It's amusing that for supposedly an intelligent community I only get rants and righteous rhetoric, amusing thing is I get the same reaction from bengalis lol, they are also into this wokism stuff, it's going to be bad for sure if people don't grow and adapt

???
Most Jaats and Punjabis are brave, they are direct to your face..not crooked...no back stabbing and will break your bones if you fight with them unfairly.
They totally have BALLS of steel which generate lightning when agitated by others.

Read Deva Samhita on the origin of Jaats..you would be surprised to read about their origin.

Better take care..do NOT mess with a Jaat.
Jaats call themselves Jaat Devatas.

 

[sravna]

???
Most Jaats and Punjabis are brave, they are direct to your face..not crooked...no back stabbing and will break your bones if you fight with them unfairly.
They totally have BALLS of steel which generate lightning when agitated by others.

Read Deva Samhita on the origin of Jaats..you would be surprised to read about their origin.

Better take care..do NOT mess with a Jaat.
Jaats call themselves Jaat Devatas.

I like that Renuka .

 

[sravna]

Crookedness, ruthlessness and perverted intelligence are all features of those who have fallen and who make lives miserable for others while they themselves live in misery.

They do not want to put in the discipline and right efforts to lead a righteous life.

Oh what a fall! Righteousness given a negative connotation! Things can't get worse. That is my hope.

 

[sravna]

I must concede in one sense I am able to sympathize with Super1223s thinking that when everyone around you are crooked and ruthless how can we be not to survive? The understanding that world is crooked is right but we need to adopt the right method as a counter.

A man cannot fight in isolation. But my advice would be this. Don't get corrupted at the level of mind. Maintain the purity and for your part don't propagate wicked or parrot them if possible. By keeping the mind pure and just acting out at the physical level we are waiting for the opportune moment to strike back with impact and effect.

 

[XLR8R]

@XLR8R are most of them unmarried only then, why don't they marry women from Bihar where dowry is prevalent?,
Do you know the history of this, when this sort of intercaste marriages started at least from point of view of Delhi.

At age of 32-35 yes many are unmarried. Don't know many people in 40+ age bracket.

In Bihar or UP the families have some negative connotations if you marry your ward by arranged marriage or matrimonial service to someone from far off state. So if you're from Bihar your family is likely to be ok for matches from Bengal Odisha or UP but not so much for other places.

The families there militaristically promote marrying in same ethnicity/caste group because they are aware they are not rich relative to others (east India in general is poorer) and hence they feel a gender imbalance in marriageable adults will make things tough for their community.

Although if the girl is educated and open minded and the boy is smart it can happen without much issue, but in general a South Indian Brahmin family has a much better background (in terms of upbringing, exposure, English language education, open minded thinking, good lifestyle, access to better facilities, materialistic things like branded accessories, good clothes, gourmet food, etc.) compared to the average Bihari, Bengali, Odia or Assamese Brahmin family.

So "in practice" what I have seen, is that even when boy and girl are ok with it, the South Indian Brahmin boys' parents will not be happy with the really small house and simplistic living of these east Indian Brahmin groups and then the relationship will break.

But my experience also is that most Bihari/Bengali/Assamese families still fear about things like female foeticide and wife beating, and in Brahmin community they are worried about language barrier and tend to ask questions that might feel funny to a south Indian because we have never seen those things. Also in these ethnicities the women (i.e. mothers) are not very well educated relative to a south indian family of similar standing so in conversation between families there is chance of mismatch and arguments due to misinterpretation/misunderstanding.

Finally most Brahmins east of UP and Chhatisgarh are occasional non-veg eaters. Although in many cases if a girl likes you enough she will agree to not eat anything non-veg in the house, or in some cases even give up completely. In many cases for these communities one sibling may be pure veg, other sibling may love chicken, third sibling may only eat once in blue moon etc. But in traditional Tamil Brahmin families the parents are not very comfortable with relatives eating non veg and tend to then look for "pure vegetarian" families.

The key is to adjust and not feel offended, then anything is possible. But since marriage is decided not just on boy's agreement or girl's satisfaction but also on parents communication and understanding, there come many diverse factors to navigate which are not so easy. One needs to be patient, intelligent and calm.

As for when these IC marriages started, I would say started in 90s but picked up in 2009 onwards due to MNC IT startup boom.

 

[sravna]

Some great and elaborate analysis and dissection by Shri. XLR8R. They definitely have their place in understanding why things are as they are. In addition to having that sort of understanding, TB community should not let go their prized emotional calmness and clarity and employ them in making final decisions. Pragmatism 50% maturity 50%.