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Is ‘staying single’ is on the increase?

  • Thread starter Thread starter V.Balasubramani
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The problem with most of the Indian parents is that they want their children to be a 'kOndhai' - :baby:

for life time! By the time the children are in early twenties, they know how to live a life 'they want'!

Not many need even the guidance of their parents. Blessed are those who have loving children even

if they live far away!


I have also seen that many stay single or go for IC / IR weddings, if either the parents are fighting cocks
- :fencing: OR they are too dominating - :whip:. In case of IC , IR weddings, those who DO NOT want

to loose the son / daughter, accept the wedding with a :D. Life is like that!
 

Now an interesting real story (!) - BTW why do we say real story? :becky:

We had a distant relative mAmA, who was in his seventies when I met him first in my teens! He was the Bhisma

of that family. He will be very happy to talk to little girls and show some magic tricks to entertain them. After a

few years, I came to know that he had a 'set up' family and had a son also and it was 'ooraRindha ragasiyam'. :dizzy:


 
Raji Ram said:

Now an interesting real story (!) - BTW why do we say real story? :becky:

We had a distant relative mAmA, who was in his seventies when I met him first in my teens! He was the Bhisma

of that family. He will be very happy to talk to little girls and show some magic tricks to entertain them. After a

few years, I came to know that he had a 'set up' family and had a son also and it was 'ooraRindha ragasiyam'. :dizzy:


Click to expand...

WHO might that (anti-Bhishma) Bhishma be???
297.gif
 
Yesterday when my mother suddenly asked me "How is kondai?"
I thought she was asking about my little grandson and
srarted telling her about the little cutie.
But my mother intercepted and said
"I am asking about your kondai who is alone now?"
His family has to her parents' home for vacation.
 
I found family of strange members.

The man is a widower without any children.

The uneducated women is a with a daughter.

She is the wife of the man's younger brother.

The grown up girl calls him Appa and her Amma.

Cool! Fine!! He is looking after

his brother's widow and educating his niece.

But there was something which struck me as very odd.

The woman in forties did not a have a single tooth in her mouth!!!

How does she eat without any teeth?

Why should she go around with

neither real teeth not a denture??? :confused:
 
Folks,

In my opinion, there were always folks in our families who wanted no part of a married life. In my own extended family, I have several uncles and aunts who elected to remain single for whatever the reason. I think our religion also has an outlet for this, like the true renunciates in other religions.

The topic at hand is whether this number is increasing, taking in to account the population increase. I am not sure that it is.

Regards,
KRS
 
palindrome said:
Dear Mrs.VR, Why not parents love the children (without feeling the need to control children)? When love is true (ie., not considered a burden, obligation, chore, a job, a problem, etc) children very well sense it. Also, when love is true, it lets the loved one go, without expecting anything in return (including commitment). If love comes back to us (if at all it does, which is very rare) then we should consider ourselves blessed.
Click to expand...
Similar thought made me write this:

அறிவீரே பெற்றோரே!

பாசம் காட்டி வளர்த்த மகன் மேலை நாடு சென்ற பின்
நேசம் காட்ட மறந்தால் என்னதான் செய்வது?

“தென்னையை வெச்சா இளநீரு; பிள்ளையைப் பெத்தா கண்ணீரு!”
உண்மைதான் உரைத்துள்ளார்! அது மிகக் கசப்புத்தான்!

தன் வாழ்க்கைத் துணையைத் தானே தேடணுமாம் – பெற்றோர்
தன் வேலை வளர்த்ததுடன் தீர்ந்த்ததென எண்ணணுமாம்!

"நம் இனத்தில் நல்ல பெண்ணிருந்தால் கூறு", என்றால்,
"எவ்வினமாயின் என்ன? உன் வேலையைப் பார்", என்கின்றார்!

தன்னைப் பேணிய பெற்றோரை விடவும் – தான் அந்த
மண்ணில் கண்ட மடந்தை உயர்வாகப் போகின்றாள்!

இந்நாளில் பெண்களுக்கோ அமெரிக்க மாப்பிள்ளை வேணும்;
எந்நாளும் மாமன் மாமி இந்தியாவில் இருக்கவேணும்!

பெண்கள் மட்டும்தான் பெற்றோரைப் பேணுகின்றார் – இல்லை!
பெண்கள் தன் பெற்றோரை மட்டும் பேணுகின்றார்!!

சாண்பிள்ளை ஆனாலும் ஆண் பிள்ளை என்று எண்ணித்
தான் மகிழ்ந்த காலமெல்லாம் மலை ஏறிப் போயிற்று!

பிற் காலத்தில் தன் தேவைகளைத் தன் பிள்ளை கவனிப்பான் என
எக்காலத்திலும் கற்பனை வேண்டாம்! அறிவீரே பெற்றோரே!

தன் உழைப்பால் சேர்த்த செல்வம் தானம் தருமம் போகத்
தனக்கென்றே வைத்தவர்தான் கலிநாளில் பிழைத்திடுவர்!!


:peace:
 
Raji Ram said:
Similar thought made me write this:

அறிவீரே பெற்றோரே!

பாசம் காட்டி வளர்த்த மகன் மேலை நாடு சென்ற பின்
நேசம் காட்ட மறந்தால் என்னதான் செய்வது?

“தென்னையை வெச்சா இளநீரு; பிள்ளையைப் பெத்தா கண்ணீரு!”
உண்மைதான் உரைத்துள்ளார்! அது மிகக் கசப்புத்தான்!

தன் வாழ்க்கைத் துணையைத் தானே தேடணுமாம் – பெற்றோர்
தன் வேலை வளர்த்ததுடன் தீர்ந்த்ததென எண்ணணுமாம்!

"நம் இனத்தில் நல்ல பெண்ணிருந்தால் கூறு", என்றால்,
"எவ்வினமாயின் என்ன? உன் வேலையைப் பார்", என்கின்றார்!

தன்னைப் பேணிய பெற்றோரை விடவும் – தான் அந்த
மண்ணில் கண்ட மடந்தை உயர்வாகப் போகின்றாள்!

இந்நாளில் பெண்களுக்கோ அமெரிக்க மாப்பிள்ளை வேணும்;
எந்நாளும் மாமன் மாமி இந்தியாவில் இருக்கவேணும்!

பெண்கள் மட்டும்தான் பெற்றோரைப் பேணுகின்றார் – இல்லை!
பெண்கள் தன் பெற்றோரை மட்டும் பேணுகின்றார்!!

சாண்பிள்ளை ஆனாலும் ஆண் பிள்ளை என்று எண்ணித்
தான் மகிழ்ந்த காலமெல்லாம் மலை ஏறிப் போயிற்று!

பிற் காலத்தில் தன் தேவைகளைத் தன் பிள்ளை கவனிப்பான் என
எக்காலத்திலும் கற்பனை வேண்டாம்! அறிவீரே பெற்றோரே!

தன் உழைப்பால் சேர்த்த செல்வம் தானம் தருமம் போகத்
தனக்கென்றே வைத்தவர்தான் கலிநாளில் பிழைத்திடுவர்!!


:peace:
Click to expand...
Read using azhagi transliteration. But please if you don't mind, could i request for a rough translation in English? Many thanks.
 
Losing ALL the teeth in late 30s or early 40s
is unusual even in a poor country like India.
The daughter was 15 years old when I saw her.
Considering the early marriages in villages
of the not-much-educated women,
the mother must have been ONLY plus or minus 40!
 
I think the proportion of singles we are discussing here is less than 5% of the entire population. The reasons are discussed in length above and do not want to comment about them.

My point is "If they know the Plus and Minus of their decision", we should leave it to their choice.

Perhaps GOD wants them to be as they are..
 
Visalakshi Ramani said:
I found family of strange members.

The man is a widower without any children.

The uneducated women is a with a daughter.

She is the wife of the man's younger brother.

The grown up girl calls him Appa and her Amma.

Cool! Fine!! He is looking after

his brother's widow and educating his niece.

But there was something which struck me as very odd.

The woman in forties did not a have a single tooth in her mouth!!!

How does she eat without any teeth?

Why should she go around with

neither real teeth not a denture??? :confused:
Click to expand...

i have seen people here , women losing their teeth in the twenties. apparently it is the inability of the body to absorb calcium, and little by little, the teeth break away.

my athai patti, had no teeth. and no dentures either as mottai pattis of those days, no one spend any money on them. she used to what we call 'மொம்மி மொம்மி '...stuff like murukku etc she used to soak it in coffee or tea till till gets soft, and then eat it. fruits used to be squished. rice used to be well massaged into almost semi liquid form...yes, there are ways of eating without the teeth.
 
kunjuppu said:
i............ no one spend any money on them. she used to what we call 'மொம்மி மொம்மி '...stuff like murukku etc she used to soak it in coffee or tea till till gets soft, and then eat it. fruits used to be squished. rice used to be well massaged into almost semi liquid form...yes, there are ways of eating without the teeth.
Click to expand...
Poor dears!

What all harassment unlucky women of those days faced!! :sad:
 
palindrome said:
Read using azhagi transliteration. But please if you don't mind, could i request for a rough translation in English? Many thanks.
Click to expand...
Dear Palindrome,

It is easier for me to type out Thanglish! So, here it goes... Hope it is OK!

aRiveerE petrOre!


pAsam kaatti vaLarththa magan mElai naadu sendra pin

nEsam kaatta maRandhaal ennadhaan seyvadhu?


"thennaiyai vechchaa iLaneeru; piLLaiyaip peththaa kaNNeeru"!

uNmaithaan uraiththuLLaar! athu migak kasappuththaan!


than vaazhkkaith thuNaiyaith thaanE thEdaNumaam - petrOr

than vElai vaLarththadhudan theerndhadhena eNNaNumaam!


"nam inaththil nalla peNNirundhaal kooRu", endraal

"evvinamaayin enna? un vElaiyaip paar", engindRaar!


thannaip pENiya petrOrai vidavum - thaan andha

maNNil kaNda madandhai uyarvaagap pOgindraaL!


innaaLil peNgalukkO amerikka maappiLLai vENum;

ennaLum maaman maami indhiyaavil irukka vENum!


peNgaL mattumthaan petrOraip pENugindraar - illai!

peNgaL than petrOrai mattum pENugindrAr!


saaN piLLai aaNaalum aaN piLLai endru eNNith

thaan magizhndha kaalamellaam malai ERip pOyitru!


piR kaalaththil than thEvaigaLai than piLLai gavanippaan ena

ekkaalaththilum kaRpanai vENdaam! aRiveerE petrOre!


than uzhaippaal serththa selvam dhaanam dharumam pOgath

thanakkendrE vaiththavarthaan kalinaaLil pizhaiththiduvar!
 
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