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Sarvangam

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Dear Mrs. Raji Ram,

I did not participate in this thread for the simple reason, thinking about this subject brought some painful thoughts to my mind. When I was young, my grand mother used to send me for getting our family barber once in two months to get her head shaven as per the old tradition. She was so close and dear to me I used to wonder why she should under go this and why can't she grow hair and live like any other women. But I did not get any answer for this query, till I grew up.It is a shameful truth,at a particular period of time , no other community has imposed such degrading practices on their own mothers and sisters like Brahmins. Because of their economic dependance these unfortunate ladies had to put up with all these inhuman practices without protest. Worst sufferers for life were the child widows.

Regards,
Brahmanyan,
Bangalore.
 
Brahmanyan said:
Dear Mrs. Raji Ram,

I did not participate in this thread for the simple reason, thinking about this subject brought some painful thoughts to my mind. When I was young, my grand mother used to send me for getting our family barber once in two months to get her head shaven as per the old tradition. She was so close and dear to me I used to wonder why she should under go this and why can't she grow hair and live like any other women. But I did not get any answer for this query, till I grew up.It is a shameful truth,at a particular period of time , no other community has imposed such degrading practices on their own mothers and sisters like Brahmins. Because of their economic dependance these unfortunate ladies had to put up with all these inhuman practices without protest. Worst sufferers for life were the child widows.

Regards,
Brahmanyan,
Bangalore.
Click to expand...

Dear Sir,

It is so sad to read this but I don't think its Brahmins alone who practice this.
When I was a student in India a Bengali Kshatriya Caste friend of mine told me that in her joint family..widows(her widowed grandmother) were only allowed to wear white and have their head shaven and given to eat food with no salt in it.
 
Dear Brahmanyan Sir,

I can understand your feelings. My mother lost her mother soon after her second younger brother was born. My mom and her five

siblings were all brought up by her grandma who was widowed at the age of 18! That grandma had undergone the evil practice of those

days and was given a 'naar madi' at that tender age, with all beauty gone for ever! I feel a lump in my throat even when I think of her!
She was a brave lady, full of affection, a God mother to all of us and lived up to the ripe age of 93! :pray2:

But the OP is about sarvAngam for men!! :)
 
Even today I know a couple bengali old ladies who observe the strict vrat voluntarily, not forced by anybody including their children.

Anyway, sarvangam is now done by many - wrestelers, body builders, Mr. Chennai or Delhi, and many more. Whether they do it themselves or get it done is not worth debating.

renuka said:
Dear Sir,

It is so sad to read this but I don't think its Brahmins alone who practice this.
When I was a student in India a Bengali Kshatriya Caste friend of mine told me that in her joint family..widows(her widowed grandmother) were only allowed to wear white and have their head shaven and given to eat food with no salt in it.
Click to expand...
 
renuka said:
Dear Sir,

It is so sad to read this but I don't think its Brahmins alone who practice this.
When I was a student in India a Bengali Kshatriya Caste friend of mine told me that in her joint family..widows(her widowed grandmother) were only allowed to wear white and have their head shaven and given to eat food with no salt in it.
Click to expand...

Dear Doctor,

I am aware that when these degrading practices were imposed on the helpless widows by the community that claimed cultural maturity,few other communities also followed them in Maharashtra, Bengal and some parts of Uttar Pradesh. For the SC & STs there were some enlightened leaders to take their cause to free them from oppression. But except a few leaders like Ram Mohan Roy, no one seem to have come out to free these unfortunate souls. It was the individual educated families just ignored diktats and discontinued these abhorring practices themselves.

Regards,
Brahmanyan,
Bangalore.
 
Brahmanyan said:
Dear Doctor,

I am aware that when these degrading practices were imposed on the helpless widows by the community that claimed cultural maturity,few other communities also followed them in Maharashtra, Bengal and some parts of Uttar Pradesh. For the SC & STs there were some enlightened leaders to take their cause to free them from oppression. But except a few leaders like Ram Mohan Roy, no one seem to have come out to free these unfortunate souls. It was the individual educated families just ignored diktats and discontinued these abhorring practices themselves.

Regards,
Brahmanyan,
Bangalore.
Click to expand...

Dear Sir,

One of my mother's good friend a Bengali Brahmin lady told us before that she only saw her face in the mirror the day she came to Malaysia after her marriage.

When she was growing up..she said her parents never allowed her to look at the mirror cos they told her that good family girls do not need to beautify themselves.

She said that she used to look at water to get a glimpse of her face.

After marriage her husband left with her to M'sia and she said that was the first time she actually saw her face fully in a mirror.

She said all these years without a mirror made her an expert to tie a saree and to apply Bindi and Sindoor perfectly without a mistake.
 
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I think I wrote this in our forum sometime back. I had one Telugu speaking student to learn Carnatic music.

She told me that her father wants her to become a great musician and so will not allow her to eat food with

salt, tamarind and chilly, to control desires! She became the youngest music director for one Telugu film,

at the age of 12!! :thumb:
 
Brahmanyan said:
Dear Mrs. Raji Ram,

I did not participate in this thread for the simple reason, thinking about this subject brought some painful thoughts to my mind. When I was young, my grand mother used to send me for getting our family barber once in two months to get her head shaven as per the old tradition. She was so close and dear to me I used to wonder why she should under go this and why can't she grow hair and live like any other women. But I did not get any answer for this query, till I grew up.It is a shameful truth,at a particular period of time , no other community has imposed such degrading practices on their own mothers and sisters like Brahmins. Because of their economic dependance these unfortunate ladies had to put up with all these inhuman practices without protest. Worst sufferers for life were the child widows.

Regards,
Brahmanyan,
Bangalore.
Click to expand...

dear B,

it is really heartwarming to see the attitudes of our community these days.

i have a cousin, widowed in her mid 30s, mid 1990s. not only has she picked up her bharatanatyam career (which was put on hold during her entire married days due to the attitudes of her in laws), but she dresses fancy (good for her) pattu etc and goes all over the world for her concerts.

in addition, she was the chief host and right out in the public including the dais, during her daughter's wedding. i would imagine that she would be the same during the forthcoming wedding of her son.

we have talked of re marriage. her pat answer - she loves the freedom and would never again surrender it to another man :) though, i think personally, since her kids have grown up and left, she should find a companion, who appreciates her. she says, all the men her age, she is now in her 50s, dont have that attitude of giving full freedom to their spouses. and the available ones are bald, fat and expect to be served - when she herself is pretty svelte and outgoingly cheerful. :)
 
Sometime before Independence:

It was Mahaamaham time in Kumbakonam and a white police chief was doing aerial survey over the congregation waiting to do a holy dip there. He asked his subordinate “why so many Burmese police are detailed here?” “Please give them duty elsewhere”. The subordinate humbly replied, “Sir, what you see are not Burmese police.” “What you see are widowed Indian ladies who customarily shave off their head and cover up their shaven head with saree this way.” “After the holy dip they will go back to home.”
 
Greetings.

On the day I got married, in the morning I was very casually dressed in old 5 yard veshti and an old shirt. In the morning my father -in-law's barber showed up and offered to do 'sarvangam'. I just laughed! He patiently explained the custom to me and also mentioned that he would get all the cloth I was wearing when he was done and requested if I could do better than those pathetic casual wear I was wearing at that time! He was a nice guy in the village. I changed in new veshti, new shirt and also paid a liberal fees... all for cutting away two strands of hair! ( That was all I let him do ). An interesting article in the OP though.

Cheers!
 
Raghy said:
Greetings.

On the day I got married, in the morning I was very casually dressed in old 5 yard veshti and an old shirt. In the morning my father -in-law's barber showed up and offered to do 'sarvangam'. I just laughed! He patiently explained the custom to me and also mentioned that he would get all the cloth I was wearing when he was done and requested if I could do better than those pathetic casual wear I was wearing at that time! He was a nice guy in the village. I changed in new veshti, new shirt and also paid a liberal fees... all for cutting away two strands of hair! ( That was all I let him do ). An interesting article in the OP though.

Cheers!
Click to expand...
hi
braber can check our physical before the wife checks......its kind of detective agency work of olden days...lol
 
Raji Ram said:

I think I wrote this in our forum sometime back. I had one Telugu speaking student to learn Carnatic music.

She told me that her father wants her to become a great musician and so will not allow her to eat food with

salt, tamarind and chilly, to control desires! She became the youngest music director for one Telugu film,

at the age of 12!! :thumb:
Click to expand...

Raji Madam

If one does not eat Salt, he loses strength!!
Then how come she could learn Music?
 
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tbs said:
hi
braber can check our physical before the wife checks......its kind of detective agency work of olden days...lol
Click to expand...

Barber detective agency was not quite required. I married a girl from the same village, same street. I was seen ' sarvangm' by other kids in the village often enough, every time I went for a swim.

By the way, barber was not the only person to do detective work. Did you notice who collected the money you left under the pillow after the nuptial night?

Cheers!
 
P.J. said:
.......... If one does not eat Salt, he loses strength!!
Then how come she could learn Music?
Click to expand...
Dear P J Sir,

You should be knowing that salt derived from vegetable is good enough to keep us active. Now a days there are

ads to educate people to eat ONLY 2 gms of salt everyday! But it is true that 'uppu illA paNdam kuppaiyilE'.

P. S: I add a pinch of salt when I make 'mysoorpak' to enhance the taste!! :D
 

There is one more custom! On the wedding night, the groom is served 'paal chaadham' in a silver plate!

Groom keeps some money under the plate and it is collected by the sister of the bride, who cleans the plate later.
 
kunjuppu said:
what is this? new to me!!
Click to expand...

In the morning after the nuptial night, the bride would be brought out by her elder sister. Elder sister also would clean the linen and roll the bed. A dhakshina would be placed for the sister-in-law under the pillow. Since I knew everyone, there was nothing formal in my case. Everyone was making demands quite vocally for everything! Well, usually brides elder sister would be looking for tell-tale signs while rearranging linen.

Cheers!
 
Raji Ram said:

There is one more custom! On the wedding night, the groom is served 'paal chaadham' in a silver plate!

Groom keeps some money under the plate and it is collected by the sister of the bride, who cleans the plate later.
Click to expand...

Not necessarily 'paal saadham'. What if the groom doesn't like 'paal saadham'? It can be sweets, fruits or anything suitable for the occasion. Brides elder sister would be responsible for few observations and for bringing out the bride after ' nalangu - aarathi' in the morning.

Cheers!
 
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i have heard that these days, in the silver plate, along with sweets and milk, there is also nirodh or trojan packets.....and the older sister inspects in the morning, as to the number of packets split and the size too. ;)
 
Raghy said:
Not necessarily 'paal saadham'. What if the groom doesn't like 'paal saadham'? It can be sweets, fruits or anything suitable for the occasion. Brides elder sister would be responsible for few observations and for bringing out the bride after ' nalangu - aarathi' in the morning.

Cheers!
Click to expand...

Raghy Sir

Greetings

As usual , this thread had taken a turn to a different subject!!

KOMJAM ADAKI VASIKANUM; Raji Madam is also here!!!

Cheers!
 
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