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Why are India's housewives killing themselves?

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prasad1

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More than 20,000 housewives have been killing themselves in India every year since 1997, the earliest year for which we have information compiled by the National Crime Records Bureau based on occupation of the victim. In 2009, the grim statistic peaked at 25,092 deaths.
Suicide rates of housewives vary from state to state.
In 2011, for example, their rates - more than 20 per 100,000 people - were higher in states like Maharashtra, Pondicherry, Tamil Nadu, Madhya Pradesh, Kerala, Karnataka, Andhra Pradesh, Goa, West Bengal and Gujarat. Punjab, Uttar Pradesh and Bihar showed lower suicide rates.
Peter Mayer, who teaches politics at the University of Adelaide and has spent much time studying the sociology of suicide in India, wonders why suicide rates of housewives in India is so high, and why it gets so little attention in the media.
After all, as Mr Mayer says, research in western societies suggests that "marriage confers protection from suicide to married women".
Therefore, married people are less likely to kill themselves - studies have found suicide rates for married people in the US and Australia, for example, are lower than others in the same age group.
India, clearly, is an outlier.

A study published in the medical journal The Lancet in 2012 found that the suicide rate in Indian women aged 15 years or older is more than two and a half times greater than it is in women of the same age in high-income countries, and nearly as high as in China.
Married women are part of the cohort. Mr Mayer, author of Suicide and Society in India, and co-researcher Della Steen, found that the "risk of suicide is, on the whole, highest in what are probably the first or second decades of marriage, that is, for those aged between 30 and 45".
"We found that female literacy, the level of exposure to the media and smaller family size, all perhaps indicators of female empowerment, were correlated with higher suicide rates for women in these age groups."
Also, the researchers say that suicide rates among housewives are lowest in the most "traditional" states, where family sizes are big and extended families are common. Rates are higher in states where households are closer to nuclear families - Tamil Nadu, Andhra Pradesh and Kerala. (Dowry-related deaths are treated as murders.)


Mr Mayer told me that he believed the high rate of housewife suicides was linked to the "nature of the social transformation in the nature of the family, which is occurring in India".

"I suggest that a central explanatory factor is the importance of changing expectations concerning social roles, especially in marriage," he says.
There are conflicts with spouses and parents, and "relations between poorly educated mothers-in-law and better-educated, insubordinate daughters-in-law" are a source of tension.
An educated daughter-in-law was more likely to "forge a strong alliance with her husband and persuade him to break off from his parents and set up a nuclear family on their own", according to one study by Joanne Moller.
Dr Vikram Patel, a leading Goa-based psychiatrist and professor at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, who co-authored the Lancet study, tells me that the high rate of housewife suicides in India can be attributed to a double whammy of "gender and discrimination".
"Many women face arranged marriages by force. They have dreams and aspirations, but they often do not get supportive spouses. Sometimes their parents don't support them either. They are trapped in a difficult system and social milieu," he says.


"The resulting lack of romantic, trusting and affectionate relationship with your spouse can lead to such tragedies."
Making things worse is the lack of counsellors and medical facilities for patients of depression. Then there's the social stigma associated with "mental illness".
Next big question: why does the media ignore the rising rate of suicides among married women, when, say, farmer suicides, rightly, gets a lot of attention?

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-35994601
 
The actual suicides in males is twice that of females at all india level with regional variations...West Bengal has highest female suicides amongst all states (source wiki)
 
Is there a possibility some of the housewives have lost interest in their marriages and do not feel they want to play the role of wife,mother,daughter in law anymore but since there is no way out of the situation they resort to suicide?

Sometimes a person does not actually want to die but rather is seeking a drastic change in their life..but sadly sometimes death is the only change that is possible.

I know the traditionalist are going to blame all this ills on the break down of joint families..but we have to see beyond tradition here and address individual issues which are seldom discussed.
 
Not all modern housewives commit suicide when they are unhappy.

Some quietly turn to others for a relationship.

Others , make the husband commit suicide by driving him to it as vganeji has pointed out

women cope better than men if they are in unhappy marriages.
 
Not all modern housewives commit suicide when they are unhappy.

Some quietly turn to others for a relationship.

Others , make the husband commit suicide by driving him to it as vganeji has pointed out

women cope better than men if they are in unhappy marriages.

Unhappy marriages are not always the cause for having relationships with others(affairs).

In fact at times to have an effective affair one needs to have a very stable and happy marriage!

Sounds paradoxical but there are individuals who like the stability of a happy marriage and the high of an affair.

Most men or women who have affairs usually are in a very happy marriage and would crumble if their marriages were to break down but at the same time they want a hormonal high of an affair.

Its just that these types like to have the cake and eat it both!

The finding may seem controversial and many like Rishikeshan Ji might not likes this post..but sometimes when a marriage seems happy and all stable still someone either husband or wife might commit suicide..at times affairs help stabilize marriages for individuals who need the stability of marriage and the extra attention of another relationship.

To cut it short its like this....Marriage is like Nirguna Brahman...its stable unchanging...gives us security..An affair is like Saguna Brahman..it is transient in nature yet it gives satisfaction to the devotee cos it has a personal touch.

And the person who subscribes to both marriage and an affair is under the influence of Maya.
 
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Unhappy marriages are not always the cause for having relationships with others(affairs).

In fact at times to have an effective affair one needs to have a very stable and happy marriage!

Sounds paradoxical but there are individuals who like the stability of a happy marriage and the high of an affair.

Most men or women who have affairs usually are in a very happy marriage and would crumble if their marriages were to break down but at the same time they want a hormonal high of an affair.

Its just that these types like to have the cake and eat it both!

The finding may seem controversial and many like Rishikeshan Ji might not likes this post..but sometimes when a marriage seems happy and all stable still someone either husband or wife might commit suicide..at times affairs help stabilize marriages for individuals who need the stability of marriage and the extra attention of another relationship.

To cut it short its like this....Marriage is like Nirguna Brahman...its stable unchanging...gives us security..An affair is like Saguna Brahman..it is transient in nature yet it gives satisfaction to the devotee cos it has a personal touch.

And the person who subscribes to both marriage and an affair is under the influence of Maya.

LOL.

So in the whole process what is never grasped is sAyujyam. The search goes on and on without an end. LOL.
 
Unhappy marriages are not always the cause for having relationships with others(affairs).

In fact at times to have an effective affair one needs to have a very stable and happy marriage!

Sounds paradoxical but there are individuals who like the stability of a happy marriage and the high of an affair.

Most men or women who have affairs usually are in a very happy marriage and would crumble if their marriages were to break down but at the same time they want a hormonal high of an affair.

Its just that these types like to have the cake and eat it both!

The finding may seem controversial and many like Rishikeshan Ji might not likes this post..but sometimes when a marriage seems happy and all stable still someone either husband or wife might commit suicide..at times affairs help stabilize marriages for individuals who need the stability of marriage and the extra attention of another relationship.

To cut it short its like this....Marriage is like Nirguna Brahman...its stable unchanging...gives us security..An affair is like Saguna Brahman..it is transient in nature yet it gives satisfaction to the devotee cos it has a personal touch.

And the person who subscribes to both marriage and an affair is under the influence of Maya.

Doc, you seem to have done quite some contemplation on the state of "affairs" :)

All things being fair and equal, a man and a woman would yearn for multiple partners, imo.

STD.

(sorry to digress) ;D
 
Doc, you seem to have done quite some contemplation on the state of "affairs" :)

All things being fair and equal, a man and a woman would yearn for multiple partners, imo.

STD.

(sorry to digress) ;D


I like to read about controversial situations and psychology research on various personality types.

It is interesting.

The best is to throw people off balance by a point blank question...once a couple of older ladies were discussing about their childhood days and school days..you could see them becoming "young" again when they spoke about their childhood.

So I decided to tease them a little and ask them "so what things naughty did anyone of you do when young? anyone painted the town red?"

The next moment all their faces lost their new found "youth"..some turned pale with the horror of the question..some turned a 50 shades of red with anger I guess or did they blush?

I quickly left and got the worst scolding from my mum ever in my life becos these ladies were her friends.

You see people become angry too fast when posed with a controversial question..why? Is it something they are afraid that a secret would be revealed or some feel they have been judged etc? Anger sometimes hides the most secrets.Anger is denial.

Well... I never got to know..cos all these old ladies remained silent!LOL
 
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I agree with renukaji that romance and marriage have not much to do with each other.

If scientists are to be believed very few mammals are monogamous and why humans practised monogamy was centuries back , communities had agricultural communes

practising polygamy.Due to fear of STI [sexually transmitted infections] they turned to monogamy -one male opting for one female for a lifetime. Later on religion

sanctified this principle.

Romance is mostly based on physical attraction , something to do with natural process at a certain age when is exposed to the other sex. It might or might not result in

marriage.Even in stable marriages one can feel romantic about another human being. That does not mean anyne will sacrifice his/her marriage for it.All want both. most do

not like to rock the stable boat for fishing for a gold fish.lol
 
Unhappy marriages are not always the cause for having relationships with others(affairs).

In fact at times to have an effective affair one needs to have a very stable and happy marriage!

Sounds paradoxical but there are individuals who like the stability of a happy marriage and the high of an affair.

Most men or women who have affairs usually are in a very happy marriage and would crumble if their marriages were to break down but at the same time they want a hormonal high of an affair.

Its just that these types like to have the cake and eat it both!

The finding may seem controversial and many like Rishikeshan Ji might not likes this post..but sometimes when a marriage seems happy and all stable still someone either husband or wife might commit suicide..at times affairs help stabilize marriages for individuals who need the stability of marriage and the extra attention of another relationship.

To cut it short its like this....Marriage is like Nirguna Brahman...its stable unchanging...gives us security..An affair is like Saguna Brahman..it is transient in nature yet it gives satisfaction to the devotee cos it has a personal touch.

And the person who subscribes to both marriage and an affair is under the influence of Maya.

hi

maya infuenced in marriage and affairs too....you know the both psychologies....i think many affairs are happening

DUE TO MIDDLE AGE CRISIS....ATRACTION BEYOND RECOGNITION.....already experienced in married life....more

psychological needs than a physical needs.....physical need also part of affair....SO MORE SAAYUJYAM/SAAMIPYAM

IN AFFAIRS....
 
practising polygamy.Due to fear of STI [sexually transmitted infections] they turned to monogamy -one male opting for one female for a lifetime. Later on religion

sanctified this principle.


This is what was written in the newspaper today.

That latest studies say the fear of STD was the cause for monogamy.

The title was Germs,Not True Love Make Humans Mate For Life!


Here it is:


http://news.discovery.com/human/evolution/germs-not-true-love-make-humans-mate-for-life-160412.htm
 
hi

maya infuenced in marriage and affairs too....you know the both psychologies....i think many affairs are happening

DUE TO MIDDLE AGE CRISIS....ATRACTION BEYOND RECOGNITION.....already experienced in married life....more

psychological needs than a physical needs.....physical need also part of affair....SO MORE SAAYUJYAM/SAAMIPYAM

IN AFFAIRS....

From Advaita people opted for Bhakti Marg!LOL
 
This is what was written in the newspaper today.

That latest studies say the fear of STD was the cause for monogamy.

The title was Germs,Not True Love Make Humans Mate For Life!


Here it is:


http://news.discovery.com/human/evolution/germs-not-true-love-make-humans-mate-for-life-160412.htm

I read something from another newspaper 'the Mail Today' of april 14th . Nothing elaborate but a couple of paras. and I remembered your post.

so scientific researchers back you.you are on strong wicket.

Some extracts.

Heading -Wedding was invented only to stop genital herpes

Sub heading- Monogamy emerged because sleeping around became risky

Monogamy is present only in 3% of mammal species.

Scientists believe that with hunter gatherers over 12000 years ago started living in bigger farming groups , the spread of STI may explain a shift towards the

emergence of preferring one sexual partners over many.

Prof. Chris Bauch and colleagues of univ of waterloo canada believe this led to pre historic humans remaining in stable relationships leading to institution of marriage

Polygamists would have been punished and made social outcastes thanks to presence of STI

The spread of contagious diseases can influence the development of social norms it appears.

So renukaji, there is scientific research to support your theory.
 
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So renukaji, there is scientific research to support your theory.

I am actually glad to know what I have been thinking all these years does have a scientific backing!LOL

I remember telling my mother that humans are actually not meant to be monogamous but external factors and evolutionary factors including cultural conditioning have influenced our behavior..deep down inside each one of us lies a raw hidden talent of being Polygamous/Polyandrous etc.

But she got mad with me saying "hey we are Hindus...we do not carry such unfaithful rotten behavior genes"

You see even she believes in gene theory!

Over the weekend I am planning to tell her about all the latest scientific research backing up my theory.She would really get mad with me again and go into denial mode.

Once I tried to suggest matching her widowed friend with my widower Father In Law just to be friends for a start but everyone got angry with me!

I think I am starting to understand why my mum feels happier when my younger brother comes home..cos he does not talk to her about human behavior and polygamy etc!LOL
 
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