A Brahmin's Voice

[renuka]

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Since there is so much problems with even same caste marriage....I guess eventually the "friends with benefits" scenario might start to sprout!LOL

 

[vgane]

Dear Vgane ji,

There is risk in all types of marriage..love and arranged and also with same caste too.

What you have mentioned also happens in same caste marriages too if things go wrong.

So its not merely becos of intercaste marriage..its so happened the marriage did not work out.

After all same caste marriages of all communities too end up in divorce at times and fair skinned DIL is always preferred by Indians.

If going by the fact that same caste marriages have high success rate..there wont be any divorces in India.

BTW usage of the words entice and infatuation makes it sound that one party is totally innocent and the other totally guilty. To be fair to both parties..words like "falling in love" is more appropriate.

Dear Renukaji,

Yes it takes two to tango...My concern is the TB girls falling prey to the road side romeos...We need to educate the children of the pitfalls..The 3 cases that I penned are not that an uneducated girl from the country side falling for her man

The 3 girls are from Army school, PSBB & from a private Matriculation school...The dalliance was looking honky dory initially & they fell for the sweet words overlooking their parents and siblings advice..Now they are ruing their fate..Now their lives are spoilt and doomed

Have we seen any Main stream Cinema even commercial talking about their woes? Is their any write up anywhere even among the Brahmin publications about this malaise?

Can the Brahmin society at least now get their act together to prevent erosion of the community?

 

[krish44]

vganeji
I have also come across two such brahmin girls [well educated] falling for NBs who were already

married and ended up damaging the lives of two NB wives.both were love marriages. both these

girls were fair. recently [about on year back] I attended the marriage of daughter of such a couple.

the first wife was generous enough to send her son to help out at the wedding and discreetly

stayed away. The second couple , the man turned out to be a wife beater treating both his wives

equally badly. In these cases , the brahmin girls were callous enough to marry men knowing fully

well the men were already married under the excuse they were in love .

 

[rishikesan]

Dear Krish, Your Posting #72 , if it could open the Eyes of the parents it is most welcome. Recently a few Horoscopes brought for matching were in the range of 22 years. Major problem is more age & more criticisms on either side, leading to arguments which are obviously different from the aged, well earning women ( they are no more Girls ) Even the parents wonder as to why & How their daughters have drastically changed ?
When this situation happens to be ruling, the Brahmin Forum becomes FUTILE & don;t you think, we are only writing comments & counter comments & feel happy , being a contributer with literally no involvement in the TOPIC Let the Topic be closed . Hope you will Second my proposal ?
Secondly reconsider the feasibility of meeting I know--You have good number of such persons who would seriously take the topic for propagating ?
Rishikesan

 

[krish44]

Dear Krish, Your Posting #72 , if it could open the Eyes of the parents it is most welcome. Recently a few Horoscopes brought for matching were in the range of 22 years. Major problem is more age & more criticisms on either side, leading to arguments which are obviously different from the aged, well earning women ( they are no more Girls ) Even the parents wonder as to why & How their daughters have drastically changed ?
When this situation happens to be ruling, the Brahmin Forum becomes FUTILE & don;t you think, we are only writing comments & counter comments & feel happy , being a contributer with literally no involvement in the TOPIC Let the Topic be closed . Hope you will Second my proposal ?
Secondly reconsider the feasibility of meeting I know--You have good number of such persons who would seriously take the topic for propagating ?
Rishikesan

rishikesanji
I welcome your initiative to do good and find matches for brahmin community girls and boys.

I always help anyone who approaches me asking for a suitable match.

I hardly found any difficulty in finding matches from good families for my own and extended

families.

my help for those wanting a match is on a person to person level as it is a individual personal issue

and group solutions have no meaning.

discussions help only in getting updated on ground realities which this forum ably does.

with best wishes to you on your endeavours.

krish44

 

[rishikesan]

Marriage of Brahmin Boys/ getting matching Girls

rishikesanji
I welcome your initiative to do good and find matches for brahmin community girls and boys.

I always help anyone who approaches me asking for a suitable match.

I hardly found any difficulty in finding matches from good families for my own and extended

families.

my help for those wanting a match is on a person to person level as it is a individual personal issue

and group solutions have no meaning.

discussions help only in getting updated on ground realities which this forum ably does.

with best wishes to you on your endeavours.

krish44

Dear Krish, The reply given to my poser encourages me to interact more., with you. About your assistance to locate groom/ Brides, if it is really possible---then ? Hats Off to you.
You have rightly mentioned that looking for alliances is purely personal & left to the families concerned. We , meaning myself & my wife, a professional Astrologer are only doing Porutham for families who write & talk to us. We give everything in writing & no need to meet us even, if they are from outstation or anywhere in the Country & other countries,
Besides Porutham, She writes Full predictions covering all aspects in kife, including Marriage/ child/ Foreign education/ Family life/ Dasa Periods covering 3 to 4 years. We never like Jataka Parivarthanai,because those days have gone & it is risky.
If I want to help a few of those who need Girls for Boys, can I ask them to write to you ?
Thanks
Rishikesan ( A, Srinivasan)

 

[adityac057]

i would suggest to keep distance with NB people and in contact with bramin families so that we do not loose the the actual importance of our community.
its also better to arrange marriage for our children as early as possible in order to prevent the inter cast marriage.
because increasing the age of marriage could make the children to choose wrong life partner. we should help for community people whenever they suffer economically and socially. let us be pratriotised to our community.
because if this continues there will be no pure bramis prevailing in our country.

 

[Vaagmi]

I think the following steps will go a long way in making the TB community retain its uniqueness:

1. Every brahmin neighbourhood (where brahmins stay in large numbers as neighbours) should have a local brahmins club which can have the local brahmin managed, brahmins owned temple, bhajan mandali, matom or a sabha as the base. The brahmins should be actively canvassed to become members of these clubs.

2. The well employed brahmins should be encouraged to mentor bright and promising young boys and girls to become accomplished individuals in their chosen line. It can be anything. Can be science, technology, business, music, dance or entrepreneurship.

3. The brahmin young men and women who are abroad should be approached to become members of these clubs and participate in its activities.

4. Politics should never be mixed in this social initiative.

5. Parents with children in the marriageable age should be encouraged to work with a brief algorithm of horoscope matching. no need to go deep into horoscopes and write a bhashyam on that. God will take care of the couple after marriage as to their luck in life and not the navagrihas. A class may be conducted to these parents about the futility of believing in navagrihas instead of God.

6. The children in the marriageable age should be taught about the uniqueness and greatness of brahmin caste and should be taught that it is in their own interest to marry within the community. In this they can be exposed to lectures by learned elders as well as scientists and people who can talk from personal experience. (In kerala the syrian christians have such an arrangement. Every church arranges classes for grown up men and women ready for marriage to tell them the importance and reasons for marrying within the community.)

7. Elders with the help of Acharyas should endeavor to create an informal network of brahmin mentors and facilitators who would help young men and women of the community in finding good jobs, seats for courses etc., a kind of an ID card should be issued to such men and women for whom access to such mentors should be made easy and quick.

8. All brahmin institutions like temples, sabhas, matoms etc., should be managed well and a system of democratically elected representatives managing them should be introduced by convincing the Acharyas and seeking their cooperation and help. The kind of relation between laity and church can be emulated and copied here too. Acharyas can remain detached from the day to day running of the order/matom etc., and concentrate on spirituality and teaching while the council of grihastas can run the financial affairs in a transparent manner remaining accountable to the community.

9. We can learn a lot from Parsis (the community owns a substantial chunk of shares in the Tata business empire).

Just some loud thinking.

 

[krish44]

finding a match is very simple if we do away with horoscope matching , post a decent well written profile with decent

photo[s ] in a matrimonial site. one should know how to write a profile stressing on education and career alone of the boy and girl

after prelimery talk with parent allow boy and girl to talk on line or skype a couple of times to get initial mutual acceptance

and have just one meeting to clear , and finalise the wedding. this can be done in two to three weeks.

one should be decisive . and then we should be clear what sort of match we want before hand and should be willing

for a compromise on some issues.

also people bring their personal ego and allow biases to cloud their judgement.

matches which boy and girl decide ,parents should learn to accept without bringing extraneous issues.


t

 

[V.Balasubramani]

We already have a Tamizhnnadu Brahmins Association (Thambraas) doing noble service since 1980. In our area this Association is more active and all Members involve and do service.

To learn more: http://www.thambraas.com/services.php

 

[cmano1981]

i would suggest to keep distance with NB people and in contact with bramin families so that we do not loose the the actual importance of our community.
its also better to arrange marriage for our children as early as possible in order to prevent the inter cast marriage.
because increasing the age of marriage could make the children to choose wrong life partner. we should help for community people whenever they suffer economically and socially. let us be pratriotised to our community.
because if this continues there will be no pure bramis prevailing in our country.

I have seen few love marraiges, where boy and girl checked whether they are brahmins, including sects and then went to parents to do their marriage. It was successful and all were happy. Those boys and girls probably are taught by their parents about their origins and importance. Parents who are busy with their own work and not spending enough time with their kids do damage to themselves and their kids.

 

[kunjuppu]

9. We can learn a lot from Parsis (the community owns a substantial chunk of shares in the Tata business empire).

Just some loud thinking.

surely not from Parsis, dear vaagmi. they stopped procreating long ago, and what little of them is left, may be rich. but no one to leave their wealth. we certainly want our children to have many children, don't we?

 

[Vaagmi]

surely not from Parsis, dear vaagmi. they stopped procreating long ago, and what little of them is left, may be rich. but no one to leave their wealth. we certainly want our children to have many children, don't we?

LOL.

I said a lot. Not everything.

We should tell our children to have four children each.

I hear someone calling me a hindutva............... LOL.

 

[krish44]

LOL.

I said a lot. Not everything.

We should tell our children to have four children each.

I hear someone calling me a hindutva............... LOL.

children thru how many wives ?lol

 

[tbs]

We already have a Tamizhnnadu Brahmins Association (Thambraas) doing noble service since 1980. In our area this Association is more active and all Members involve and do service.

To learn more: http://www.thambraas.com/services.php

hi

i agreed,,,,still a lot of problems....even my son had SAMASTI UPANAYANAM through *******...im the member of *******....

its not reached grass root level of brahmins....becoz variety of subcaste system among brahmins...

 

[Raji Ram]

children thru how many wives ?lol

oru poNNukkE vazhi illAdha samayaththil, ippadi oru AsaiyA?

 

[Raji Ram]

finding a match is very simple if we do away with horoscope matching , post a decent well written profile with decent

photo[s ] in a matrimonial site. one should know how to write a profile stressing on education and career alone of the boy and girl

after prelimery talk with parent allow boy and girl to talk on line or skype a couple of times to get initial mutual acceptance

and have just one meeting to clear , and finalise the wedding. this can be done in two to three weeks............

You have an incorrigible positive attitude!

 

[V.Balasubramani]

oru poNNukkE vazhi illAdha samayaththil, ippadi oru AsaiyA?

ஆசை யாரைவிட்டது!!

 

[apsarathy]

I agree with the opinion of our members here. However, some parents are also at fault. When the girls are educated and work in a big company earning handsomely, these parents do not want to let go of their daughter lest the family income gets diminished. They try to put off the marriage on one pretext or the other and finally one day the girl makes her own selection and becomes a 'odukaali' as one member had defined such girls.

 

[kunjuppu]

I agree with the opinion of our members here. However, some parents are also at fault. When the girls are educated and work in a big company earning handsomely, these parents do not want to let go of their daughter lest the family income gets diminished. They try to put off the marriage on one pretext or the other and finally one day the girl makes her own selection and becomes a 'odukaali' as one member had defined such girls.

this would not happen, if the boys' side are enlightened enough, to share 50% of the wedding expense, and allow the girl, to contribute her income to her family, post marriage. right? guess how many, still, of boys families are willing to do this simple thing?

a while ago, a woman was angry here, at the haughtiness and demands of modern girls' parents. i challenged her above, and she flatly refused to accept these terms.

 

[iyer.sreedharan]

பிராமணன் எபோதுமே ஒரு படி மேல் தான், நம்ப வர்கம் தான் உட்டு கோடது போறாங்க, இது நடக்க விடாமே சேயனும். நம்பளை மட்டமா நனெக் கூடாது. எல்லா பெரியவர்களும், சிறியவர்களும் இதுக்கு ஒதைழகனும். we have to save our prestige in the society at any cost