Sri Rudra Maha writes:-
"When us Brahmins who are supposed to lead the way have gone behind material pursuits, what’s the point in lamenting of children going astray in life. Met many people at a crowd. All old people with kids abroad, but none of them are happy with their children’s choices of their spouses, life etc. What’s stopping such people to voice out their opinions loudly rather than being hypocritical to their own kids?"
These same recurring concerns have been raised before. They appear to encapsulate issues of personal perplexity, disillusionment, despondency, despair, leading sometimes to a confession of inadequacy and helplessness. It is a life-challenge we face, not a mere puzling dilemma. It is a battle for survival, for self-preservation.
To seek viable solutions can we please try to go back to our roots a little?
We are not a born-yesterday, die-tomorrow community. We have our Vedams, smrithis, puraanams. We have rules of conduct which are valid even today.
"sathyam vada; dharmam chara" (speak the truth; perform your assigned duties and responsibilities) commands our Krishna Yajur-veda Taittireeya Upanishad Cap. I, v. 19. It goes on to adjure, "maathru devo bhava; pithru devo bhava, aachaarya devo bhava, adithi devo bhava" (treat your mother as divine, your father as divine, your spiritual preceptor as divine, your guest under your roof as divine) Cap I. v. 20.
The Vedams and the principles, the teachings, and the philosophies contained therein form the bedrock of our culture, our civilisation, our way of life, our raison d'etre, the very cause of our existence as humans, as Indians, as Hindus, as Braahmanas.
These Vedams were not composed yesterday or the day before.
Kishkinda-kaandam of Vaalmeeki's epic, the Ithihaasa-puraana Raamaayanam, has a passage in which Sree Raamachandra, the sixth and human manifestation on Earth of Lord Sree Mahaa-Vishnu, tells his half-brother Lakshmanan that Hanuman, the man-ape disguised as an aged ascetic appearing before them, was well-versed in the Rig, Yajur and Saama Vedams.
Hence, the Vedams and their partitioning into Rig, Yajur, Saama, and Atharva had happened before even the the thretha yugam.
Not just before the end of the kali-yugam by someone who was born to a fish and a gandarva, was adopted and brought up by a fisherman and who, though vowed to brahmaachaaryam (lifelong celibacy), slept on his mother's orders with two widows Ambika and Ambaalikaa of King Vichitra-veeryan and also slept with Ambaalikaa's maid, thereby fathering respectively blind Drithiraashtra, mottled-skinned Paandu, and Vidoora (vide Devi Bhaagavatham). (I have read elsewhere that there were no less than 24 successive Vyaasas who from time to time moulded the enormous amorphous mass of manthrams before partitioning it into four.)
Reverting to Sri Rudra Maha's concerns of today's "children" (they are fully-grown self-opinionated rebellious adullts in reality) going astray, parents' laments, unhappiness at chldren's choices of spouses, and general frustrations and hypocrisy, can we accept that coercion, collusion, conspiracy will not work?
Today's parents should realise that they did not grow up in the same mileu and with the same lexicon as their children. Being curious about and emphasising with their children's feelings and experiences, will help parents support their children's transition to the new life. Providing a listening ear, being always accessible, showing love is better than jumping in with advice.
The young are aways under pressure to perform, to achieve, to excel, and not to let themselves and others down. They sometimes experience a sense of "disconnection" as if body and soul are not "in tune". Children need space and time to recover. Parents need to respect their children's need of privacy, to count their own blessings, to help children to cull "toxic" friends, and get the children to "open up" to parents.
Sri Rudra Maha's recommendtion is that parents should "voice out their opinions loudly" -- a sure-fire foregone guarantee of failure which wiill only antagonise not only the children themselves but everyone around, including well-wishers.
A spoonful of sugar (or honey) will make the medicine go down, as the song says. Bigotry and demagoguery will have negative repercussions.
The parents should themselves set the example of disciplined Braahmanic lives and show that it is feasible and practicable, not merely desirable.
In the maelstrom of modern life, whether abroad or at home, it is easy to lose one's compass, and drift on to the rocks. We need strong anchors, stout hawsers. We need an alert and intelligent captain, we need a dedicated crew of mariners. We need reliable sea-charts and maps.
We have all of those. Are we prepared to galvanise the crew, incentivise the captain, steer the ship away from the menaciing rocks and to a safe and secure harbour of our choice? To read and make sense of the charts and maps?
We need spirituality, morals, faith, conviction, eternal vigilance, guts and gumption to succeed. It might well be a case of now or never.
Back to our sacred scriptures.
Yes, we Braahmanas are unique. Aren't the Amish and the Quakers? The Bahais, the Ahmadiyyas, the Shias? The myriad cults from the Syrian Orthodox, the Greek Orthodox, the Russian Orthodox, the Eastern Orthodox, to the Mar Thoma Orthodox churches? The Lutherans, the Presbyterians, the Christian Scientists, the Mormons, the Anglicans, the Methodists, the Salvation Army, the Baptists, thr Seventh-Day Advntists, the Pentacostals?
If they can survive, maintain their identities in the teeth of competition and danger, why can't we?
Sure, we can.
Sri Rudra Maha asks:- what are the options left for anyone who wishes to lead a normal dharmic life?
Little and often is probably the best way. Reform cannot be rushed. Angkor Wat was not cleared in a day. Nor was Borobudur so built.
May we start at the beginning? The minimum is our thri-kaala sandhyas. These can be divided into two components each: The shorter arkhyam-tharppanam part involving arkhyam of pure cold water chanting the mahaa-gaayathri manthram (thrice at sunrise and at sunset and twice at noon) and the gaayaathri japam (108, 32 and 64 respectively at sunrise, noon and sunset).
For beginners and reformers/rejoiners, postpone the time-consuming gaayaathri japam to weekends and public holidays, and do the arkhyam and tharppanams daily.
When you get into your stride, get a good copy of the Bhagavath-Geetha with English, Thamizh, Telegu, Kannada or Malayalam translations/commentary. Study slowly a few slokams at one time. Make sure you have caught the meaning, before proceeding further. There are 700 slokams. At 4 slokams a day you would have covered the whole Geetha in half a year or less.
Jagadguru Sree Aadi Shankaraachaarya, seeing the prolixity of worship of a multitude of deities, and consequent quarrelling among the devotees, devised a system of "shanmatam" worship, confining the worship to only six deities: Aadithya (Sun), Shiva, Vishnu, Ganapathi, Shakthi, and Subrahmania (also called kumaara).
Vaishnavaas traditionally worship only Vishnu and his ten avathaarams such as Sree Raama, Sree Krishna, Sree Narasimha, and Sree Parashu-raama. They wear distinctive forehead marks of three coloured vertical lines. Vadamas traditionally worship all six deities. They wear three horizontal lines of sacred ash (vibhoothi) across their forehead. Both Vaishnavals and Vadamas wear sandalwood paste and kumkum (reddened turmeric powder) on their foreheads.
You can select whichever deity among the six that your ancestors worshipped, and follow suit or, as my family does, worship all six. There is a tradition that Mahaa Vishnu prefers ornamentation and garlands (especially basil -- thulasi) , that Shiva prefers abhishegam (bathing with 12 ingredients), and that the Sun prefers prostrations (surya namaskaaram).
There is also a custom that each and every one of the deities (and their consorts) can be worshipped by shodasha-upachaara puja -- worship with 16 steps/offerings. You can learn this from your family priest. Going further, there are 1008-name sahasra-naama sthrothrams for most deities. These are resorted to on special occasions, such as festivals, and elaborate archanais done.
One last word before I close. Sri KRS, well-known member, advises:
"Live to understand who am I?
This query was posed by Ramana Maharishi. The answer is found in many of our Upanishads, i.e. it is not the human body, but the spark of divinity that inhabits the living body, the jeevaathma which, when the body dies (with the cessation of the function of the praanas and the indriyams) returns to the Paramaathma.
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