I prefer to be polished and gracious in my criticism. But when provoked I hit hard. Please read further.
I remember the following Tamil Kavithai when I read all that is being posted here about the Kalai differences in Vaishnavam. And am amused.
கான மயிலாடக்கண்டிருந்த வான்கோழி
தானும் அதுவாகப்பாவித்து, தானும் தன்
பொல்லாச்சிறகை விரித்தாடினால் போலுமே
கல்லாதான் கற்றா கவி.
None has bothered to find the difference between the two kalais in terms of their philosophical and interpretational differences. They are happy with the externals like U mark Y mark, yellow mark blue mark etc., Stupid, It is much deeper and has a lot to do with philosophical interpretations of scriptures. Now let us take a look at the Hindu society as it exists today-not a thousand years back:
1.A virudhunagar Dakshina Maara Nadaar will not marry from a Karappettai Nadar from Sattur. a Kovilpatti Nadar will not have anything to do with a Kanyakumari or Mukkudal Nadar. All these may be Nadars and yet this Nadar will not touch that Nadar.
2.A senkuntha Mudaliyar, a Kaikkola Mudaliyar, A vellala Mudaliyar and an Arcot Mudaliyar are islands in isolation. Marriage between these communities is taboo. Each subsect considers itself to be having blue blood.
3. a siruveettu pillai, a kaarkaaththa pillai and a vellalappillai may be pillais but will not accept each other as equal. A kottai pillai lives in complete isolation in his fortress and never will accept any of the other pillais. Some pillais are saiva pillai (Veg) and some are non-saivam (non veg).
4. A gomutty chetty will not go near a Naattukkottai chetty and there are telugu chetty and Tamil chetty among the Gomutty who will not see eye to eye.
5. a kallar, maravar and agamudaiyar though all three are thevars will have nothing to do with each other.
6. There is a kondaiyaan thevar who considers themselves superior to all these thevars and so will not have anything to do with these mukkulaththu thevars.
7. a Chozha desaththu vadaman will have nothing to do with a Pandiya desaththu vadaman even though both are vadama brahmins or for that matter with a vaathiman. A vadaman will have nothing to do with a ashtasahasram because they are below par. an ashta sahasram and and vadaman or vaathiman will not have marriage ties with a brihacharanam brahmin because he is lower down in the totem pole. All these smartha brahmins will not even touch a Mukkaniyan or a Chozhiyan or a madhyanna p****yan from Kallidaikurichi because he is in the lowest tier of the totem pole. Then we have keeththu Naamams, Thirunankovil vadaman etc., among the vadamans themselves and each one is an island.
8.a telugu speaking reddy will not touch a Reddiyarpatti reddy from Tamilnadu. And a Gavara Naidu will not marry from Kamma naidu family because they do not see eye to eye.
9. You can go on adding anynumber of hindu communities to this list. Whether it is Yadavas, Vanniyars, Goundas, Naickers each one has subdivisions and fiercely preserve their subdivision. identity.
Conclusion:
1)With Vaishnavas it is just two and the division is based on philosophical interpretational differences and not some funny and fierce clan identity. Where people do not bother about the philosophical interpretations, the two kalais have been intermarrying for the last hundreds of years. I expect that immediately the elephant will be brought in. Yes it was a legal dispute with two sides trying to assert their respective rights to worship and the elephant was treated as just another asset of the temple. Vaishnavites laugh at their own folly and have taken it in their strides. Only the stupid others are unable to get over that for ever. And when compared to the much worse human right violation of asking thevaram to be chanted standing at a lower level in the Thillai Natraraja Temple is easily papered over. Will Nataraja not listen to Tamil Thevaram if the othuvar chanting it stands at a higher level and chants it?
2)The much larger issue viz polytheism which encourages worshiping one God in the morning, one after 2 hours, another after another four hours and another in the evening and then one in the night. Worshiping navagrihas because of the mortal fear that they may harm if not worshiped, worshiping Yama the God of death because of the fear that he may grant a few more years of life if he is paid his dues, The effort to reach the mirage called the samadhi and over emphasising its greatness etc., needs reform. People have to change by either becoming vaishnavites or by converting to Christianity or Islam. That is the only way to their salvation.