India’s Rape Crisis Undermines the Country

[sarang]

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Better to be safe than sorry. Dress is only one of the innumerable things that can trigger a hostile reaction in a potential rapist, who may execute the vile deed in a different time frame, on a different person, young or old.

This recent rape report from Gurgaon, delhi, shows that when risks are taken knowingly, one has to suffer. The girls knew the rapists, they took an unknown taxi without waiting for their regular taxi. They knew delhi's crime rate.

"Gurgaon police on Friday nabbed the key accused in the Thursday early morning rape in a moving car.
"The Toyota Corolla Altis car in which the twowomen were raped by the accused has been retrieved.
" Dharmabir had been trying to get to girls over the past week but when he couldn't he got a friend to lure them to get into his car and then carried out the rape of the victims.
" Since their taxi driver had not reached in time to pick them up, they hired a Toyota Altis car for Rs 300 in front of Vipul Agora Mall building.
Accused claims: The accused has been identified as Dharambir, and it was he who planned the rape to get value for the Rs 10,000 he had paid to the two victims and also raped one of them.

Gurgaon gang rape: Main rape accused arrested, but ground reality unchanged - The Times of India

 

[sarang]

Pepper spray and siren is available for Rs 200, safer to carry it than suffer.

 

[auh]

I feel that the fundamental issue has been misunderstood. Nobody is saying that a man does not equal a woman, only that man and woman cannot be seen with the same eye, in certain cases. For a majority, the opposite sex attracts, and, cloaked by (changing) societal norms, the outward gestures may be dormant, but simmer like live coals underneath.

Again, I would not generalize, for there are those where the dormant phase has probably made the attraction obsolete over the centuries.

But this is reality - dressing appropriately is just a precaution, and may prevent sexual abuse, but it would be illogical, imo, to conclude that if rapes/abuse occur in spite of dressing appropriately, the reason becomes invalid, ipso facto. No, it just means that this factor can be ruled out, since the motive is different. We just cannot generalize.

Example: A lone person carrying quite a significant amout of cash on his person, in a deserted path, may be attacked and murdered but with the money left intact. The motive in this case could be a "jati prechanai" or "Nela Thagaraaru" or "one-sided love" or 'business compet" etc. But, can we take this to infer that persons carrying cash will not be attacked for the loot they carry but for some other?


Elders used to say "Dushtanai kandaal dhoora vilagu" i.e., keep out of harm's way as much as you can.

 

[amala]

Again I feel rape is not about attraction or lust but power. The rapist can easily go to a willing woman or a brothel, but no theres no kick of domination of power in that is there? So he goes for the victim who he can subdue. That is completely not lust. It is power. end of.

 

[C RAVI]

LOL!!! The post no.129 is a paradigm of ignorance!!


Brothel services are not offered Free Of Cost.

MEN are MEN, descent or shameless criminals. Rapists too want to have intercourse with a girl/lady who is not sleeping with many men every day-in and day-out, mechanically and being rude/curt while dealing with costumers.

A hungry and perverted man can not count on a lady to sleep with him willingly, without making any hard efforts to convince her. He wants instant fulfillment by hook or crook from any lady he want.




A perverted and shameless Man will not mind attacking a girl to fulfill his lust with the help of his masculine power over a girl. Masculine power is just an aid to perform NOT the reason for committing rape/gang rape.

 

[auh]

But why would a power hungry male go to the extent of sexual abuse? Do power hungry females also find that seduction or sexual abuse is the only way out?

There are no rapists before, only after. I think the act itself would have started modestly, in most cases, as a feeler to gauge the response of the victim. Sometimes, if the women retaliates and if the molester panics, he turns off. How often have I seen women in buses shout or slap the offender (small time offenders, and they do this in a crowded bus but not to satiate their power hunger). Then there are those who cannot turn back once they have scratched the surface - like gambling. A brothel is harly the place for a fantasy or a harlot is hardly the choice for an emotional swell.

Even if one were to accept (for argument's sake) that power is the reason, can we ask then, why is sex the tool? Subjugation can take many forms, so why this?

 

[amala]

Now if I had precious 2 mins lets say. Would I want to read post no 130 for its major covering up insecurity which causes the writers condescendence or would I read post no 131's thoughtful. erudite and sincere imploring? your guess is as good as mine.

 

[amala]

Sex has been used as a tool to subjugate women for centuries. Its hardly new. Why? because they can.

 

[zebra16]

theodor w adorno defined what would be later called "blaming the victim," as "one of the most sinister features of the Fascist character.
"she was asking for it", is what the people of the opposite side would say..

trespassing a house is a crime, which every one knows. yet, do we leave our house doors unbolted, why?

rapist is an animal.. its a mental disorder, contracted by only few. And its for us to take precautions against such animals.why voluntarily fall a prey to an animal.Majority of the rapes happen at the instant, very few cases of plot-to-rape, so why not avoid falling victim to such instincts.

can we walk in the night to a reserved forest, and ask the tiger to stay away us, cos, we also have an equal right to have a holiday totter in the forest? Come into my parlor, said the spider to the fly!!

must there be a middle path, where , being modest , makes sense. ie, avoid being vulnerable.. the book of law of being modest, is written by no body else, never ever by an Arab police, but, by each individuals

Your point of rapist being an animal (at least temporarily) is well taken and either the animal is caged (as in zoo) or we are in well covered and secure vehicle (as while one is in African safari) is a good example of segregation needed between the two.

But comparing rape to a trespass or heist or robbery doesnt cut much ice. Rape is much more severe in that the victim herself as also the society feel rape is loss of irreplaceable dignity so more preventive measures are neededi to nip the idea at the bud irself.

 

[C RAVI]

The use of Sex as a tool to subjugate women Does not make SEX as having the only purpose of Subjugation.

Strangers do not rape girls for the purpose of subjugating the girl. Mind it!! They only want personal fulfillment of SEX that can satisfy their perverted mind.

 

[zebra16]

I feel that the fundamental issue has been misunderstood.

Fundamentally there is no misunderstanding of the issue. Everyone without exception condemns the despicable act of rape.

One group would like the women to be attired as per the norms or dress code of the society they are living in, to minimize any chance of being victim.

The other group is vehement that women can dress as per their will and no harm should come to them and it is the obligation of the State and society to ensure that. People not agreeing with this view are termed as passive rapists, rape supporters or rape apologists
and by implication less cultured and are living in stone age and have at least 1400 years of civilization to catch up with.

 

[prasad1]

Fundamentally there is no misunderstanding of the issue. Everyone without exception condemns the despicable act of rape.

One group would like the women to be attired as per the norms or dress code of the society they are living in, to minimize any chance of being victim.

The other group is vehement that women can dress as per their will and no harm should come to them and it is the obligation of the State and society to ensure that. People not agreeing with this view are termed as passive rapists, rape supporters or rape apologists
and by implication less cultured and are living in stone age and have at least 1400 years of civilization to catch up with.

Good summation.[h=2][/h].

 

[sangom]

Again I feel rape is not about attraction or lust but power. The rapist can easily go to a willing woman or a brothel, but no theres no kick of domination of power in that is there? So he goes for the victim who he can subdue. That is completely not lust. It is power. end of.

Kum. Amala,

I am neither an expert on rape nor a psychologist, to give authoritative views on the topic. Though some studies have been quoted/cited, even in some of the earlier posts here, perhaps. But to my limited intelligence and knowledge, it is not only the "power" aspect which triggers the instinct for rape in men; the unsatisfied sexual urge also causes some persons to attempt a rape, provided the circumstances also become favourable.

Your question as to why a man should try to rape instead of going to a brothel or some willing woman, omits the practical realities imho. It may not always be posssible for a person to have enough cash for payment to such a sex worker. Secondly, it may so happpen that the person has been so much lured by the depiction of female bodies in the media that, even though he is a visitor to brothels, he is no longer satisfied with that level and quality but yearns for a qualitatively much better experience. Thirdly, many such men today avoid the PSWs because of the fear of contacting AIDS.

(It is relevant to mention here that Kerala has a thriving 'house boat' tourism. It has become a mainstay for foreign tourists to have their sexual adventures of all types including paedophiles, homo-sexuals, lesbians, etc. These tourists do not want to spend much. So, there are now many women who lure girls studying in high school and the +1, +2 classes, to such customers and take away the major portion of what the tourist pays. Such young student girls are most preferred by tourists, it seems, because of the belief that these girls will be AIDS-free. Just a few days back there was a newspaper report that a girl escaped from the clutches of the foreign tourist customer, unable to bear his constant demands on her.)

As I had stated in one of my earlier posts, the lowest echelons of the society in India have been suddenly exposed to such sexually exciting consumerist culture and that too, all of a sudden, that these sections which are generally backward in education and do not have even acceptably good standards of living, really go hay-wire and then they resort to rape if they are lucky. This was what happened in the case of the Delhi braveheart (who decided to take a public transport from a point where delhiites say, no sensible person would go without one's own conveyance) as also in the present case of the Manipal rape (where the medical student felt walking at 11.30 P.M. to her flat wouls be quite safe for her).

There is an oft repeated adage in Malayalam which goes as, సూక్షిచ్చాల్‍ దుఃఖిక్కేణ్ట (sūkṣiccāl- duḥkhikkeṇṭa) - the more one is careful the less one will have to grieve later on. I feel this applies very much to women these days, especially in India.

 

[Nara]

Some from both sides are trying to caricature the other side. I for one am not advocating that women should dress as she pleases with no care for practical considerations, though I think a fully evolved society would provide the practical conditions in which women need not care and could dress as she pleases and it is a shame that she is unable to because of the fear of getting blamed if she is attacked. My point is, if a woman gets raped or molested she must be treated with utmost care and compassion and not blame her in anyway. The rapist is the only one to take the entire blame.

All this talk of men by nature are looking for an opportunity to gratify their carnal instincts and that women who do not dress modestly are asking for it is simply disgusting, though I certainly would not label such talk as rape apology.

Another disgusting aspect of this discussion is that tendency to make this into a contest of nationality and the childish "you too" reaction. Rape victims undergo lifelong trauma, whether she is in the west or east, whether she is Caucasian or Asian. Violence against women is an international scourge. I believe studies show that one in three women the world over will get sexually assaulted in their life time. Citing crime statistics and making sweeping statements based on hearsay does little to understand the gravity of this issue the world over.

I think we men, especially the privileged ones, should put ourselves in the the shoes of the women, especially poor and vulnerable women -- you know the thing called empathy -- and try to understand, to the extent possible, the challenges of having to navigate modern life with the danger of getting molested lurking at any turn.

 

[C RAVI]

Finding and advocating a safe move does not make one insensitive to the pains of rape victims. It does not make them cruel with out any heart to be sympathetic towards rape victims.

Just because reasonable precautions are advocated, when some one make twists and turns and make unreasonable and baseless accusations and some say that Rape is ONLY "to show a girl how powerful man is to control her" and for Nothing Else, that's really very childish of them.


A society can be healthy only when Male and Female together be sensitive and responsible.

 

[C RAVI]

Irresponsibly encouraging the girls to move on roads in exposing skimpy dress where ever she wants and when ever she wants, in order to educate (so called most needed awareness) her with what is her absolute liberty is AND then saying that my hart pains and shedding tears when they become a rape victim NOT gonna server anything better to the girls.

Girls beware!! Wake up and be sensitive and responsible. Apply your brain and be cautious in choosing your costume, the time, route and presence of mind. Feminist who touch your heart with their sympathy and encouraging you to expose the way you, where ever you want, any time you want etc..etc not gonna come to your rescue and their tears not gonna do anything good to you.

 

[renuka]

Strangers do not rape girls for the purpose of subjugating the girl. Mind it!! They only want personal fulfillment of SEX that can satisfy their perverted mind.

What is this Quick Gun Murugan Style Mind it! Mind it?

Most rapist are not capable emotionally of connecting with any woman for a personal fulfillment sex...now Personal Fulfillment sex is practiced even in marriage...both normal man and normal woman have sex for mutual satisfaction and personal satisfaction in varying proportions.

A rapist does not think like this...he just cant connect..for him Sex is a form of aggression and about being in control and subjugation of the female.

I feel may be some of us are confusing the meaning of the word Subjugation as the usual subjugation we see in life like junior being subjugated by a senior..a wife by her husband etc...that is different.

The psychological definition of subjugation in terms of rape is different all together.

May be some of us should get more familiar with such terms.

Rapist is not Quick Gun style for a Wham Bham Thank You Maam...He is Shooting the very idea of a women itself..he subjugates her in his mind when he violates her.

I won't chose words like Mind it! to prove a point cos I keep my options open to new info in the field of psychology.

But what surprises me that some are cock sure of what they think!LOL

 

[C RAVI]

...He is Shooting the very idea of a women itself..he subjugates her in his mind when he violates her.

For a Rapist a Women is like an object, the object that can give him intercourse and satisfy his lust, as an individual and in a group. A much perverted man who is sexually obsessed would find females from the age of 3 years to even 80 years as an object to indulge in sex with her.

 

[amala]

What is this Quick Gun Murugan Style Mind it! Mind it?

Most rapist are not capable emotionally of connecting with any woman for a personal fulfillment sex...now Personal Fulfillment sex is practiced even in marriage...both normal man and normal woman have sex for mutual satisfaction and personal satisfaction in varying proportions.

A rapist does not think like this...he just cant connect..for him Sex is a form of aggression and about being in control and subjugation of the female.

I feel may be some of us are confusing the meaning of the word Subjugation as the usual subjugation we see in life like junior being subjugated by a senior..a wife by her husband etc...that is different.

The psychological definition of subjugation in terms of rape is different all together.

May be some of us should get more familiar with such terms.

Rapist is not Quick Gun style for a Wham Bham Thank You Maam...He is Shooting the very idea of a women itself..he subjugates her in his mind when he violates her.

I won't chose words like Mind it! to prove a point cos I keep my options open to new info in the field of psychology.

But what surprises me that some are cock sure of what they think!LOL

Absolutely!!!! lets all use a million exclamation marks, coz that proves our point isn't it? It won't take a secodn to use mind it too. We also have laptops and can type English!

 

[prasad1]

Renukaji,

But what surprises me that some are cock sure of what they think!LOL

Was that intended? LOL

 

[auh]

Sex has been used as a tool to subjugate women for centuries. Its hardly new. Why? because they can.

I have nothing to add/discuss to this line of thought.

 

[auh]

Fundamentally there is no misunderstanding of the issue. Everyone without exception condemns the despicable act of rape.

Well, I doubt if anybody can have counter views on the nature of the act. It is not at all a point taken up for discussion here.

The real issue is the issue of why it happens, and that is what I hoped to address.

 

[Govinda]

I have nothing to add/discuss to this line of thought.

Auh,

Becos, you understood the flaw in the thought

Wow!

For males, it is the nature. Like ordinary emotions of love, happiness etc. , they are built by the sensory perception of things (visual, speech , sound) and the physiological changes (agressive/acidic foods/high-carbs-fat - producing more hormones).

Only females, use their weakness, to become narcissist, hen-pecked wives, chase their in-laws out and keep the husbands/men in
slavery.

So, only men had to fall slave to get benefitted in marriage. May be these backgrounds like wrong food, provoking/challenging women, provoking media, expensive prostitution, changing society and stress, polluted food/environments etc. caused them to act wild!

Fix the root causes, bring social reform, be the change!

 

[prasad1]

AUHji,

The real issue is the issue of why it happens, and that is what I hoped to address.

You can always start a new thread.

 

[sarang]

One solution:

Export rapists, potential or committed, to those countries which have a low crime rate, where rape is non existent, where the social norms and social pressures will reform the person.

Norway has plans to close four prisons because of lower occupancy. If 4000 are sent there, then there will be no job loss for norwegians. If liberal laws of the country allow stress relief night visits for the prisoners, the benign environment may reform the culprits and facilitate rehabilitation.