As I mentioned in my earlier post, life is a cycle. Earlier (up to Y2k) men dictated terms. Now, women do thanks to their education and income. Unfortunately, it just happens that some people are at the wrong ends at the wrong time. This trend would would change in may be 20 years' time and some other trend would emerge. I do notice one trend that women prefer career to life. They must understand that career is part of life and is not life itself. Earning fancy salary is all fine. But it gets a meaning only when there is a happy family. Money or position should not bring arrogance and should not blind one to the risks of time. It is more important to be happy than to be wealthy. Youth hood is a rainbow. Nerves can be active only till the curves are there (LOL). May be parents can play a role here, if only kids listen!:director:
i am not particularly replying to haridas, but more an observation of this and suchlike posts. again, i am not defending or opposing any pov. what i wish to write is observations. based on 60 + years in this planet, and living in multiple cultures over time.
i think, not only we tambrams, but indian society as a whole is moving towards a different paradigms. the west went through it a few decades ago, and now it is our turn.
already the marriage age has moved to mid twenties and beyond. now we are seeing a group of youngsters unable to marry. but also, i think, within us, there are folks who do not want to marry or raise a family. it is not everyone's desire to have a family - except in the previous generations folks had no choice - influenced by societal values. of that time.
any change, i believe, while welcomed by a group, causes angst in others. my aunt joined IRAS in 1960, and was heaped verbal abuses for taking a senior position away from men (read family supporters) and also neglecting her children. today, such abuses, i think, are seldom heard, as female participation in the work force has become a norm. and the thought of additional increase in standard of living, is but a tempting fruit, which most of urban livers can seldom refuse.
in the course of human progress, this may be another way for population to reach a steady state and ultimately decrease. for how long mother earth can be pillaged and ra*ed and still sustain its sanity? the western populations are in decline. the tambram is in decline or steady state, because in order to increase one should have more than 2 children.
that in the course of career advancements and such like, we tending to postpone marriage or having children, does have a social shock, passed on to generations coming after us. today, there is no longer any lily white society in europe - the large scale migrations of coloured people after world war 2 has permanently marked its features on those societies (unless another hitler arises and conducts a mass selective genocide).
our own tamilnadu, the agraharams are lying vacant, ruins or occupied by other castes and in some cases by other religions. i do not know when the concept of agraharam started, but i bet it atleast a few hundred years old. and unless we have a model one built for musem sake, there are none anymore. and unlikely to be in future.
these are my observations, done with an effort for objectivity and in a dispassionate manner. but one cannot have a pang of sorrow, at such observations, particularly of our own community, when it is reaching its zenith of prosperity, it also faces the long decline in its numbers, and along with it, whatever influence it had, in tamil society.
on a similar point, the annual sujatha awards, in memoryof the writer, and awarded by his memorial trust is being awarded. i went through the list of i think, 8 winners, mostly male young tamil writers, and not a single tambram in the list. i, who enjoy, kalki, t janakiraman, jothirlatha girija, asokamithran, now focus on jeyamohan, poomani, manushyaputhiran and such, the latter all top notch writers, and console myself, that in the overall picture, we are all TAMILS and who cares what caste or community they belong. in many aspects of tamil life, including in the literary scene the tamil brahmin has passed on to history. there are no more young tamil literateurs from our community, that i know.
such is life!!