Comparing intercaste marriages (TB vs Other Brahmins)

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I'm a long timer lurker and never posted here.I'm from a karnataka brahmin family and I've few of TB friends. One thing I've observed is Intercaste marriages among TB is very high compared to other brahmins.For example in karnataka there are 4 major brahmin communities.I've seen personally that we can put maximum percentage of intercaste marriages are between 10 to 15%.

Girls do marry out more often than men , but still their percentage is quite low(Women perhaps marry out 15% , Men perhaps marry out 10%). In my family or extended family there isn't a single intercaste marriage.But I do know few women and men in my community who had inter caste marriages.In fact compared to 2000s and 2010s , percentage of intercaste marriages is becoming stable or lower.I've attended at least 40 marriages in 2024.Out of them 39 were from within a caste.Other one is married to lingayat community who are fellow vegetarians and have similar culture.

But things are starkly different among TB friends , where too many men and women married out. In fact among TB friends there are very few children born of both TB houses.In US I've seen too many TB women married whites, blacks, chinese , hell lot of them are atheists/agnostics or nonreligious.I was really surprised how many of them are ultra progressive and woke left.

Whenever family functions happen in my family , we are glad to meet people , who speak the same language , have the similar customs, similar thinking .But I've seen among TBs too many different types of people meet in their family functions and uniqueness is pretty much lost.

I've seen similar tendencies among Telugu Brahmins, where inter caste marriages are pretty less.When I visited north indian states ,I've observed that brahmin intercaste marriages are still within 10 to 15% threshold.

My question is why only the TB community is affected so badly ? Why not other brahmins? Basically brainwashing by dravidian parties has an effect in destroying the TB community?

I feel that in the future , when dravidianism dies , one has to import brahmins from north india just like it has been done multiple times before.

 

[sravna]

Dear Sir,'

I do not know what to say. So sad about the plight of TB community.

 

[a-TB]

Cultural and ego clashes in a marriage are far worse. Human men marrying human women is fine. Caste purely based on birth has no basis other than in human ego

But within a grouping there are cultural norms that can clash. For that reason it is better to marry within similar culture which may be found within same caste but there are no assurances . But character is more important than cultural and hence caste background.

The movie culture has created attractive members of other castes. TB boys in orthodox families tend to grow spineless. Women including TB women don’t find that attractive. TB fellows rarely tend to breakout of this mold being forced to life of celebacy.

TB household tend to be most confused compared to other groups. There are many reasons. It is a different topic area.

TB homes if Rajasic flee Tamil Nadu. Or they are Tamasic pontifying on topics of Vedanta without trying to properly learn. All these are weaknesses. Hence the community is steeped in Superstitions. Nature ensures such communities perish.

It is all God’s will. The trend cannot be stopped. But dharma will survive one way or the other.

If the trend has to be stopped then begin to live like a Brahmin as defined in Gita.

I hesitate to use the word spiritual because it is the most distorted word in this forum and is synonymous with ignorance. Rather I would say find time to study Gita and Upanishad with Shraddha. Enquire and don’t be a follower of superstitions. Be accepting of all. Then like minded people will want association in weddings. That will be a turning point for TB communities

 

[sravna]

On a more analytical note, I would say the relentless onslaught by some dravidian groups on the brahmin community did have a significant impact on the minds of the younger generations. The noise created by the dravidian groups was so loud that propaganda won and the guilt of wrongdoing was created. Also negative stereotypes about the brahmins were continuously projected that created a bad impression on the minds of brahmin youth.

Personally I feel TB community is one of the most open minded and gifted but ironically those qualities made the community to go astray.

 

[sravna]

Take it from me folks. Though I do not want to paint all Indian Americans with the same brush generally their first allegiance and naturally I would say, is to USA. But among them there are some who in the guise of showing interest and concern for Indians and the TB community do not heart of hearts have that concern especially on a matter that may hurt America.

They talk about Gita, Shraddha etc etc and worried about the very little knowledge that others at this forum have. I value them only for the different though prejudiced perspective and give only flippant interest to their content.

But let diversity galore. We cant have others shut their mouth unless it is malicious and begins to have an impact.

 

[clicq]

In Gita, Lord Krishna always asked us to fight. Not just surrender to fate without doing anything

//TB boys in orthodox families tend to grow spineless. Women including TB women don’t find that attractive.

I keep hearing brahmin men are spineless only among TB community.In my brahmin community, we rarely hear that.Also I never heard arranged intercaste marriage like what is happening in TB communities.In my community(which I refuse to specify), women who married out typically fell in love (like classmates, colleagues etc) , but they don't give reason that our boys are spineless.

I strongly feel that absense of strong anti brahminism in other states is reason for this. TB men and women are strongly brainwashed in schools and colleges with so called dravidinism , which make them reject their culture and find other culture attractive. It also make them progressive and atheists with scant regard for religion.

I'm also bit spiritual and have some experiences regarding that. What I closely observed in my community , children of following types tend to marry out lot more than others

1.Parents are atheists/agnostics
2.Parents/ancestors who did lot of evil deeds within couple of generations before
3.Parents who left brahminical practices
4.Parents who provide broken home to children and have very bad relationships among themselves.

I've seen children of very good parents also had intercaste marriage.But it is lot fewer than others.

I'm 100% sure that , TB community will be wiped out within a generation or two or greately reduced in number. By the time Dravidinism finally recedes in tamil nadu , they will have to import brahmins from north or from other states.

It had happened in Karnataka multiple times in the history . Two of Four major brahmin community traces their ancestors to north , who arrived at south to rejuvenate Vedic culture. Vedic culture wouldn't die, but TB community as we know off will most probably is.

 

[sravna]

A

Take it from me folks. Though I do not want to paint all Indian Americans with the same brush generally their first allegiance and naturally I would say, is to USA. But among them there are some who in the guise of showing interest and concern for Indians and the TB community do not heart of hearts have that concern especially on a matter that may hurt America.

They talk about Gita, Shraddha etc etc and worried about the very little knowledge that others at this forum have. I value them only for the different though prejudiced perspective and give only flippant interest to their content.

But let diversity galore. We cant have others shut their mouth unless it is malicious and begins to have an impact.

A correction in my previous post. I used the word Flippant. I really did not want to say that the content deserves respect. Sorry about the use of the word

 

[Vedant Kavaipatti]

I'm a long timer lurker and never posted here.I'm from a karnataka brahmin family and I've few of TB friends. One thing I've observed is Intercaste marriages among TB is very high compared to other brahmins.For example in karnataka there are 4 major brahmin communities.I've seen personally that we can put maximum percentage of intercaste marriages are between 10 to 15%.

Girls do marry out more often than men , but still their percentage is quite low(Women perhaps marry out 15% , Men perhaps marry out 10%). In my family or extended family there isn't a single intercaste marriage.But I do know few women and men in my community who had inter caste marriages.In fact compared to 2000s and 2010s , percentage of intercaste marriages is becoming stable or lower.I've attended at least 40 marriages in 2024.Out of them 39 were from within a caste.Other one is married to lingayat community who are fellow vegetarians and have similar culture.

But things are starkly different among TB friends , where too many men and women married out. In fact among TB friends there are very few children born of both TB houses.In US I've seen too many TB women married whites, blacks, chinese , hell lot of them are atheists/agnostics or nonreligious.I was really surprised how many of them are ultra progressive and woke left.

Whenever family functions happen in my family , we are glad to meet people , who speak the same language , have the similar customs, similar thinking .But I've seen among TBs too many different types of people meet in their family functions and uniqueness is pretty much lost.

I've seen similar tendencies among Telugu Brahmins, where inter caste marriages are pretty less.When I visited north indian states ,I've observed that brahmin intercaste marriages are still within 10 to 15% threshold.

My question is why only the TB community is affected so badly ? Why not other brahmins? Basically brainwashing by dravidian parties has an effect in destroying the TB community?

I feel that in the future , when dravidianism dies , one has to import brahmins from north india just like it has been done multiple times before.

Reason is because Dravidian movement has greatly abused TB people and brainwashed many of them into doing intercast marriage...

 

[sravna]

Dravidian movement may have brainwashed TBs into intercaste marriage but like temporary effects on all fine things you cannot prevail for long. I think the community is smart and wise enough to set vright the problem. One significant factor that I believe may have had an effect is TBs exposure to American culture. That might have liberated their general outlook and found nothing wrong with IC marriage.

But I think with resurgent India this will also be a temporary effect and TBS will realize that India has real substance and they will break free from the deluded views of American superiority. TBs resilience and maturity are enough to make them reinstate their faith in the venearble values of our land.

 

[renuka]

Dravidian movement may have brainwashed TBs into intercaste marriage but like temporary effects on all fine things you cannot prevail for long. I think the community is smart and wise enough to set vright the problem. One significant factor that I believe may have had an effect is TBs exposure to American culture. That might have liberated their general outlook and found nothing wrong with IC marriage.

But I think with resurgent India this will also be a temporary effect and TBS will realize that India has real substance and they will break free from the deluded views of American superiority. TBs resilience and maturity are enough to make them reinstate their faith in the venearble values of our land.

Dear Sravna,

Is it only USA ?
What about UK and Canada?

 

[sravna]

Dear Sravna,

Is it only USA ?
What about UK and Canada?

Renuka,

When it comes to taking praise USA only is praised but when it comes to taking blame USA wants to add U.K, Canada, Australia etc !

 

[prasad1]

I'm a long timer lurker and never posted here.I'm from a karnataka brahmin family and I've few of TB friends. One thing I've observed is Intercaste marriages among TB is very high compared to other brahmins.For example in karnataka there are 4 major brahmin communities.I've seen personally that we can put maximum percentage of intercaste marriages are between 10 to 15%.

Girls do marry out more often than men , but still their percentage is quite low(Women perhaps marry out 15% , Men perhaps marry out 10%). In my family or extended family there isn't a single intercaste marriage.But I do know few women and men in my community who had inter caste marriages.In fact compared to 2000s and 2010s , percentage of intercaste marriages is becoming stable or lower.I've attended at least 40 marriages in 2024.Out of them 39 were from within a caste.Other one is married to lingayat community who are fellow vegetarians and have similar culture.

But things are starkly different among TB friends , where too many men and women married out. In fact among TB friends there are very few children born of both TB houses.In US I've seen too many TB women married whites, blacks, chinese , hell lot of them are atheists/agnostics or nonreligious.I was really surprised how many of them are ultra progressive and woke left.

Whenever family functions happen in my family , we are glad to meet people , who speak the same language , have the similar customs, similar thinking .But I've seen among TBs too many different types of people meet in their family functions and uniqueness is pretty much lost.

I've seen similar tendencies among Telugu Brahmins, where inter caste marriages are pretty less.When I visited north indian states ,I've observed that brahmin intercaste marriages are still within 10 to 15% threshold.

My question is why only the TB community is affected so badly ? Why not other brahmins? Basically brainwashing by dravidian parties has an effect in destroying the TB community?

I feel that in the future , when dravidianism dies , one has to import brahmins from north india just like it has been done multiple times before.

I take a different view. You come to a TB forum and insult them and show how superior is YOur Brahmin group. Why start this inter-brahmin group fight? Caste tag has less meaning for educated young adults across all communities. Tamil Brahmins are a tiny community that is highly educated and has very few opportunities in Tamil Nadu. They are spread across the globe. So opportunity to meet people of the same community is difficult. If they marry outside the caste and happy why should it matter to others? I see mischief in this post.

I apologize if the intent of the original post was harmless.

 

[Super1223]

I'm a long timer lurker and never posted here.I'm from a karnataka brahmin family and I've few of TB friends. One thing I've observed is Intercaste marriages among TB is very high compared to other brahmins.For example in karnataka there are 4 major brahmin communities.I've seen personally that we can put maximum percentage of intercaste marriages are between 10 to 15%.

Girls do marry out more often than men , but still their percentage is quite low(Women perhaps marry out 15% , Men perhaps marry out 10%). In my family or extended family there isn't a single intercaste marriage.But I do know few women and men in my community who had inter caste marriages.In fact compared to 2000s and 2010s , percentage of intercaste marriages is becoming stable or lower.I've attended at least 40 marriages in 2024.Out of them 39 were from within a caste.Other one is married to lingayat community who are fellow vegetarians and have similar culture.

But things are starkly different among TB friends , where too many men and women married out. In fact among TB friends there are very few children born of both TB houses.In US I've seen too many TB women married whites, blacks, chinese , hell lot of them are atheists/agnostics or nonreligious.I was really surprised how many of them are ultra progressive and woke left.

Whenever family functions happen in my family , we are glad to meet people , who speak the same language , have the similar customs, similar thinking .But I've seen among TBs too many different types of people meet in their family functions and uniqueness is pretty much lost.

I've seen similar tendencies among Telugu Brahmins, where inter caste marriages are pretty less.When I visited north indian states ,I've observed that brahmin intercaste marriages are still within 10 to 15% threshold.

My question is why only the TB community is affected so badly ? Why not other brahmins? Basically brainwashing by dravidian parties has an effect in destroying the TB community?

I feel that in the future , when dravidianism dies , one has to import brahmins from north india just like it has been done multiple times before.

LOL, this has nothing to do with dravidian stuff, our people migrate a lot for economic reasons, and we happen to educate women as well, which usually doesn't happen in most of India, so educated women obviously would prefer to decide her partner, and would prefer outsiders to escape the orthodoxy imposed on her, this is common in urban areas outside of TN, I'm worried more about the fact that Men are not marrying out as much as women are at least outside of TN.
If we want to stop this IC stuff, you have to stop women from being educated, and or restict education of women to the bare minimum and keep them restricted to their houses, which we obviously can't do,

 

[Super1223]

I take a different view. You come to a TB forum and insult them and show how superior is YOur Brahmin group. Why start this inter-brahmin group fight? Caste tag has less meaning for educated young adults across all communities. Tamil Brahmins are a tiny community that is highly educated and has very few opportunities in Tamil Nadu. They are spread across the globe. So opportunity to meet people of the same community is difficult. If they marry outside the caste and happy why should it matter to others? I see mischief in this post.

I apologize if the intent of the original post was harmless.

I don't think TB are small at all, probably was the largest community in south India at least during the time of independence, yes people migrate for jobs and community is too orthodox esp on women, it's obvious why women want to marry out, you want to stop it either don't educate women or encourage men to be not orthodox

 

[renuka]

I find everything very weird..that is everyone wants to decide what women should do..a suggestion to restrict education of women seems totally illegal in the present day scenario.

Actually what would really help is to create extra uterine conception..that is hopefully very soon science would be able to develop an external uterus so men can programme it the way they want it to be for continuation of species...for the ova, may be they can use donor ova from a different loka.
There might be same caste individuals in some parallel universe.

Or may be we should read the puranas again to find out which technology was used to develop the 100 kauravas outside the uterus of Gandhari and how did Dronacharya managed to be conceived in a pot...it was possible in the past..so this technology should be developed.

We are still lagging behind..kindly dont restrict the education of anyone of any gender or any background or caste as anyone of them could develop what i just wrote in the future.

 

[Super1223]

I find everything weird..as usual men want to decide what women should do..a suggestion to restrict education of women seems totally illegal in the present day scenario.

Actually what would really help is to create extra uterine conception..that is hopefully very soon science would be able to develop an uterus so men can programme it they way the want it to be for continuation of species...for the ova, may be they can use donor ova from a different loka.
There might be same caste individuals in some parallel universe.

Or may be we should read the puranas again to find out which technology was used to develop the 100 kauravas outside the uterus of Gandhari and how did Dronacharya managed to be conceived in a pot...it was possible in the past..so this technology should be developed.

We are still lagging behind..kindly dont restrict the education of anyone of any gender or any background or caste as anyone of them could develop what i just wrote in the future.

why do you think girls from other communities don't do IC marriage, it's because they don't educate their girls, that's why

 

[a-TB]

LOL, this has nothing to do with dravidian stuff, our people migrate a lot for economic reasons, and we happen to educate women as well, which usually doesn't happen in most of India, so educated women obviously would prefer to decide her partner, and would prefer outsiders to escape the orthodoxy imposed on her, this is common in urban areas outside of TN, I'm worried more about the fact that Men are not marrying out as much as women are at least outside of TN.
If we want to stop this IC stuff, you have to stop women from being educated, and or restict education of women to the bare minimum and keep them restricted to their houses, which we obviously can't do,

I think you should stop worrying and start living. If you represent the so called Brahmin caste with such really narrow minded ideas about women, I would counsel anyone to run far away from the likes of your thinking

You and I cannot stop this ‘ IC stuff’. And there is no need to either. Let us educate ourselves with the real teachings to come out of ignorance. That will be the greatest contribution to human beings

 

[Super1223]

I think you should stop worrying and start living. If you represent the so called Brahmin caste with such really narrow minded ideas about women, I would counsel anyone to run far away from the likes of your thinking

You and I cannot stop this ‘ IC stuff’. And there is no need to either. Let us educate ourselves with the real teachings to come out of ignorance. That will be the greatest contribution to human beings

LOL, one group here is crying that IC marriages are happening, other group is crying that such, marriages should not stopped, I'm just giving rational understanding and solution to prevent the community from going extinct,
Either restrict women education, which is not feasible and I don't think is viable either or encourage boys to chase girls i.e parents must encourage sons to chase girls prefarbly of the same community, they should declare that they won't do any AM and it's the boys responsibility to find a partner within the caste, girls can't be controlled these days by parents esp once they go to college and stuff, so boys must be encouraged to chase girls

 

[Super1223]

I take a different view. You come to a TB forum and insult them and show how superior is YOur Brahmin group. Why start this inter-brahmin group fight? Caste tag has less meaning for educated young adults across all communities. Tamil Brahmins are a tiny community that is highly educated and has very few opportunities in Tamil Nadu. They are spread across the globe. So opportunity to meet people of the same community is difficult. If they marry outside the caste and happy why should it matter to others? I see mischief in this post.

I apologize if the intent of the original post was harmless.

We have to balance individual choice vs social interest aka clan endogamy, problem lies with parents not encouraging their sons to socialize, maintain good physique by eating decent food etc, they also expect girls who are educated to be submissive and all, if the Community should no go extinct, parents must be told to encourage boys to be more athletic and so on, they must tell boys that it's their responsibility to find a partner, parents must stop helping them. Parents must also acquire and invest wealth, otherwise we won't have any community for sure.

 

[Vedant Kavaipatti]

I take a different view. You come to a TB forum and insult them and show how superior is YOur Brahmin group. Why start this inter-brahmin group fight? Caste tag has less meaning for educated young adults across all communities. Tamil Brahmins are a tiny community that is highly educated and has very few opportunities in Tamil Nadu. They are spread across the globe. So opportunity to meet people of the same community is difficult. If they marry outside the caste and happy why should it matter to others? I see mischief in this post.

I apologize if the intent of the original post was harmless.

No superiority... He is just stating his observation. Intercaste marriages is wrong because it reesults in the loss of Brahmin culture and customs... Non Brahmins are less attractive and less intelligent. Why should one pollute his bloodline genes? This is why intercast marriages are wrong.

 

[renuka]

why do you think girls from other communities don't do IC marriage, it's because they don't educate their girls, that's why

Really?
I studied in India for my degree and my class had so many Non Brahmin girls from all communities studying there.
Its not as if Non Brahmins dont educate their daughters.

We also had female post graduates who were non brahmin communities studying there.
I remember there was a Kannada Brahmin male post graduate who was dating a Gounder Tamil post graduate girl.
Initially their respective families opposed but they finally agreed.

 

[renuka]

No superiority... He is just stating his observation. Intercaste marriages is wrong because it reesults in the loss of Brahmin culture and customs... Non Brahmins are less attractive and less intelligent. Why should one pollute his bloodline genes? This is why intercast marriages are wrong.

But what about Intermarriage with Caucasian white races?
They are mostly light eyed and very good looking, taller, better muscle mass and very intelligent too..the overall gene pool might improve.

A lot of girls do marry white men when they work in USA.

 

[a-TB]

LOL, one group here is crying that IC marriages are happening, other group is crying that such, marriages should not stopped, I'm just giving rational understanding and solution to prevent the community from going extinct,
Either restrict women education, which is not feasible and I don't think is viable either or encourage boys to chase girls i.e parents must encourage sons to chase girls prefarbly of the same community, they should declare that they won't do any AM and it's the boys responsibility to find a partner within the caste, girls can't be controlled these days by parents esp once they go to college and stuff, so boys must be encouraged to chase girls

I think the point made is something else. Let me try once more
Communities go extinct all the time and it cannot be prevented. New communities spring up and that cannot be prevented either.

No one can do anything. This universe is about 14 billion years old with the best data we have. A lifetime of 80 years is better than average and it is but a blip in the scheme of things.

There is no basis for caste or jaathi in any legitimate scriptures. Jaathi is invented by human ego and so it will perish over time because it is not in alignment with dharma.

You may think you are superior because you are born in a family of Brahmin caste. If you go around the world you will find all kinds of societies wherein they feel they are superior and will consider you inferior. All these are based on human ego.

Gita talks about Brahmana etc. Only four classification and it is NOT based on birth. Why dont you study what the teaching is. You cannot confuse with Jaathi just because someone decided to call themselves Brahmin. By Gita definition there are Brahmins everywhere in the world in every society. Most TBs are TVs - Tamil Vaishyas because almost everyone is engaged in some form of business (even in a salary position)

The reason so called TB community is going extinct is because most have lost connection as to how a Brahmana varna has to be lived. There is collective ignorance and laziness to learn the scriptures. Occasionally there may be a mahatma to teach dharma - say like Kanchi Periyava. Instead of living the teaching, you make him deity and erect a temple. Then there is a huge gulf with him and you, and you can safely do whatever you are doing except for doing archana or talk about some miracles he did (He never claimed to do any miracles) . Here the usage of word you is just a figure of expression.

Our rituals are mostly superficial and photo ops. The chanting a priest does has very little to do with vedic mantras. In fact, most TB do not want their own children to go into priest craft. Only a few who cannot get into anything worthwhile become a vadhyar. They memorize some Smruthis, probably does not know basic Sanskrit even if they managed to pronounce well. Our world is filled with greed and fear driven by newly created religious practices and superstitions.

Asrologers invent new doshas everyday. A recent one invented is called kala sarpa dosha and it seems if afflicts all born between certain dates in a year which could be tens of millions.

TBs do not learn proper Tamil literature, do not study knowledge scriptures, do not know meanings and vision behind what they incorrectly chant. They are all aping the west. The younger generation see the hypocrisy of older generation and reject. They are moved by the glitter of the west.

When it was possible to know the sex of a child to be born, enormous numbers of female fetuses were aborted decades ago because of some blind beliefs about wanting a son who can do Shraddham or whatever . Right now there is an imbalance. Many TB boys cannot find a bride unless they go outside the community.. Also TB girls watching Bollywood movies do not like the docile TB boys.

The TB community has lost its immunity. This trend cannot be prevented and will most likely reach extinction in 50 years. The numbers cannot lie. Most TB families have very few children these days.

The solution is to educate yourselves on our knowledge scriptures and teach others. Let God decide what the outcome would be. You and I are relative nobody's and our wish to stop this extinction is not going to be possible

The caste hierarchy is ego based and it will not survive the test of time.

Better to study the book of life to know the real purpose of human life. Gita and Upanishads are starting points.

 

[a-TB]

No superiority... He is just stating his observation. Intercaste marriages is wrong because it reesults in the loss of Brahmin culture and customs... Non Brahmins are less attractive and less intelligent. Why should one pollute his bloodline genes? This is why intercast marriages are wrong.

your comments expose ugliness in your thinking and thought process. May god help you.

 

[Super1223]

Really?
I studied in India for my degree and my class had so many Non Brahmin girls from all communities studying there.
Its not as if Non Brahmins dont educate their daughters.

We also had female post graduates who were non brahmin communities studying there.
I remember there was a Kannada Brahmin male post graduate who was dating a Gounder Tamil post graduate girl.
Initially their respective families opposed but they finally agreed.

No, in most cases they don't allow such marriages,even if they educate their daughters, it does happen, but it's very rare, families spoil their children too much these days, esp boys, boys are not competent enough, they're molly coddled too much, and as said we are not investing enough in them to make them competent, other communities invest a lot more in their boys compared to girls, we must mitigate it by investing in boys, encourage them to be in sports and competitive exam.